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Posts Tagged “

Detroit Red Wings

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nhl closer

Here Come The Red Wings ... Duck!

The NHL Closer is written by the Five Horsemen of the Apuckalypse from Melt Your Face Off. When not poring over the Book of Revelation for clues as to how to finally take out Gary Bettman, they can be found discovering new and inventive ways to commit blasphemy, blog-style. Weed Against Speed takes the reins of the Closer today.

Riding Pavel Datsyuk's first career hat trick, the Red Wings took out the Stars in a 5-2 drubbing at American Airlines Center in Dallas, taking a commanding 3-0 lead in the series. The Red Wings have now won nine straight games in the playoffs.

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11:10 AM on Tue May 13 2008
By melt your face off
2,573 views, 24 comments

nhl closer

Chris Osgood's Feel-Good Story Comes To A Butt-End

While Mitch Albom was gushing over what a selfless mensch Chris Osgood is on the Sports Reporters this morning for gracefully stepping aside when the Red Wings signed Dominik Hasek, he conveniently ignored the cheap shot Osgood took with the butt-end of his stick to the Stars' Mike Ribeiro at the end of regulation last night in Game 2 of the Western Conference Finals. More »

11:00 AM on Sun May 11 2008
By Christmas Ape
3,130 views, 21 comments

nhl playoff preview

Previewing The Red Wings-Stars

The Deadspin NHL Playoff Previews are brought to you by the five foppish gents at Melt Your Face Off. Please don't wear an ascot when a cravat is called for, or they will be right put out. LeNoceur breaks down the Western Conference Finals.

Forget kindergarten. Everything you need to know about life can be learned from old Westerns. You can't trust anyone like you trust your horse. Getting drunk and playing cards is really all the entertainment you need. Real men drink whiskey. People will kill you just to steal your boots. And if you need some iron to take down the local gang of rustlers, you go see the Swede.

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4:00 PM on Wed May 7 2008
By melt your face off
3,825 views, 48 comments

nhl playoff preview

Previewing The Red Wings-Avalanche

The NHL playoffs continue tonight with the Conference Semifinals. The five degenerates over at Melt Your Face Off will preview each matchup.

Put away the Super Nintendo and Sega Genesis. I hate to break it to those who lost interest in hockey in the late 90's and early 00's, but these are not your childhood's Wings and Avs. Yes, most of the major players have returned; Lidstrom, Maltby, Draper, Osgood, McCarty, Sakic, Forsberg, Hejduk, and Foote are all older and wiser. But this is not a bloodbath at the McNichols Sports Arena; this is attrition at the Pepsi Center.

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10:00 AM on Thu Apr 24 2008
By melt your face off
3,202 views, 71 comments

nhl playoff preview

The Ones Meet The Eights

NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck." More »

6:00 PM on Tue Apr 8 2008
By wyshynski
3,604 views, 38 comments

nhl closer

From Octopussies To Go Wings Gonads

The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer.

"Hello, is this the Detroit Red Wings?" "Yes, can we help you?" "Good news, actually: We've finally located your balls." "Well slap my rump and call me Sally — that is great news! They disappeared two weeks ago and we had no idea how to find them." "Yeah, turns out they were in Denver the entire time." "Denver...boy howdy, it's always the last place you'd think to look, huh?" "Well, the good news is that we can return your balls to you tonight during a 4-0 humbling of the Avalanche, so you can get back to kicking the rest of the League's collective ass...well, at least outside of your division." "Cool, what'll it cost us?" "Oh, not much: Just the health of your team captain, potential MVP and the best defenseman on the planet." "Okaley dokaley ...WAIT, WHAT THE SHIT?!"

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10:00 AM on Tue Feb 19 2008
By wyshynski
2,928 views, 43 comments

nhl closer

Why Do We Deny The Awesomeness Of The Red Wings?

The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer.

The last thing the world needs is another New England Patriots dynastic supremacy group wank-off, but it does have its benefits: Fans seems to care more about a predestined juggernaut than, say, a team like the Florida Panthers. I've been waiting all season for the NHL to embrace the Detroit Red Wings — they of the 76 points at the All-Star break — as hockey's model of Belichickian efficiency and the League's invulnerable (at least outside of their division) must-see team. So does last night's bruising 2-1 win over the defending champs in Anaheim finally cement the Wings as the closest thing the NHL has to Brady & Co.? And does that mean Brian Rafalski is their Randy Moss?

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10:40 AM on Thu Jan 24 2008
By wyshynski
2,736 views, 49 comments

nhl closer

Happy Time in Hockeytown

Yes, The Basketball Jones podcast often tells hockey to "go to hell." Guilty. But let's make one thing very clear — I don't blog on these here Internets for the money or the fame or the chance to add "Deadspin, Weekend Editor" to my Gmail signature (which is awesome, by the way). I write for the people. And the people love the NHL Closer. So here ya go, you puck-heads. More »

11:30 AM on Sat Nov 10 2007
By skeets
1,507 views, 19 comments

stanley cup playoffs

NHL Stanley Cup Pants Party: Red Wings Vs. Ducks

We have always found it amusing that Anaheim decided to take the positive modifier "Mighty" out of its name; we know they wanted to avoid the Disney context, but usually when there's a "Fighting" or a "Runnin'" in there, it's supposed to be a good thing. Now they are Ducks, simply Ducks. More »

1:15 PM on Fri May 11 2007
By Leitch
1,069 views, 34 comments

blogdome

Blogdom's Best: Hating The Red Wings

Imagine the most hateful sports fans you can think of, stuck indoors because of the frigid weather, allowing their fury to boil. Now give them large sticks. That's your typical NHL fan, just looking for a reason to hate the opposing team. Throw in that whole Canada-USA rivalry thing, and you've got a festival of enmity. So let's sit back and enjoy some of the great NHL hater blogs, shall we, you hosers?

When you think of great sports rivalries, you think of Yankees-Red Sox, Steelers-Browns, Iran-Iraq ... but Red Wings-Avalanche? We had no idea. Apparently it's true — this is one of the most heated rivalries in existence. It all goes back, we're told, to when the Avalanche were the Quebec Nordiques, the two teams located in relatively close proximity. And more recently, when a bunch of players on both sides were roughed up during the 1996 Western Conference Finals in Denver. Don't ask us for details, this is new to us too (we're still confused by the whole octopus-on-the-ice thing). Anyway, it's all chronicled here — a circus of hatred, starring the Red Wings. Enjoy.

3. Dead Wings Tribute. Featuring the smash hit "Red Wings Suck" by the Soul Thieves, and it's inevitable follow-up, "Red Wings Really Suck" by KBPI.
2. Avalanche Sanctuary. Explains the rivalry between the Red Wings and Avalanche, stitch-by-stitch.
1. Red Wings Suck. Fun anti-Red Wings games and activities for the kids, plus, a bonus "Woody Paige Sucks" section. You can't beat that. More »

1:00 PM on Wed Dec 28 2005
By Leitch
801 views, 1 comment

Latest by Kid Canada: Red Wings? I can assure you that the Maple Leafs are by far the most hated team in hockey. In fact, Sports Illustrated said so! " The Toronto Maple Leafs are a massively popular team, with the largest fan more »

hockey

Seizure On Ice

Last evening's terrifying seizure incident involving Red Wings defenseman Jiri Fischer ended with an entire game being cancelled, CPR being given right there on the bench (you can see it in that picture, from the Detroit Free Press) and, ultimately, Fischer was described as "jovial" in the hospital afterwards, which, you know, makes one of us. More »

9:15 AM on Tue Nov 22 2005
By Leitch
73 views, Comment