What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?

While collecting insertions into various orifices for our annual feature, we stumbled across a good number of truly awful penis-related mishaps. Culled from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission's database of emergency room visits, here's a year's worth of self-abuse. » 12/31/13 1:30pm 12/31/13 1:30pm

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?

As in past years, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, we have trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity. [Note: Headline has been updated. Theseā€¦ » 12/25/13 12:00pm 12/25/13 12:00pm