Be Cool Like I Used To Be: A Nervous Father's Guide To Boyhood

The main thing that qualifies me to write about Richard Linklater's Boyhood from a panicked new-ish father's perspective is that I had to wait three weeks to see Boyhood even after all the rapturous reviews came out, on account of having fled New York City in terror a couple years ago so I wouldn't have to raise…

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I Re-Watched Reality Bites and It's Basically a Manual for Shitheads

Few things have shaped my existence more profoundly than the realization, courtesy of the 1994 film Reality Bites, that there are two kinds of women—Janeane Garofalos and Winona Ryders—and that I would never, ever be a Winona. (Other things I discovered painfully, early on, that I would never be: a Shalom Harlow, a…