On Wednesday, Florida resident Jorge Jove clearly couldn’t stomach the sight of an AT&T work truck parked out front of his house. Naturally, police say, he retrieved a revolver and started shooting out the tires and engine.
The Villages, a hilariously-large retirement community in Florida, is the fastest-growing “city” in the country—with more than 117,000 people, 48 golf courses, geriatric sex (with a resulting high rate of STDs), and absolutely no children (they’re only permitted to visit for up to 30 days a year). Residents primarily …
Miami has not had an MLS team since the Miami Fusion closed down in 2001. A joint bid between Barcelona and Bolivian billionaire Marcelo Claure failed in 2009, and the league stayed out of Florida until Orlando SC entered the league in 2015. Five years ago, MLS czar Don Garber first broached the idea of plopping an…
A tennis match today between Frances Tiafoe and Mitchell Krueger at the Sarasota Open was temporarily interrupted by the sounds of some fucking.
Now here’s an item of interest. I don’t make the claim that every piece of news rises to the level of a matter of national importance, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t get a kick out of hearing some of the odd things that happen across our nation.
Florida is America’s id, and when America wants some cocaine, you better believe Florida is going to come through.
It was just your typical 3 a.m. street fight outside of a bar in Tampa until Florida Man went and ran everybody over.
Unfortunately for Marco Rubio, he’s projected to win his race for the Senate in Florida. A win that, even more unfortunately for the American people, means four more years of dealing with Marco Rubio.
If you woke up one day to discover that you were suddenly a millionaire named Ken Babby, what’s one of the first things you’d do? Would you use your wealth to humiliate a group of grown men by forcing them to wear uniforms featuring a cartoon shrimp humping the state of Florida? Why, yes—yes you would. And you would…
Reportedly mistaking a pair of teenage Pokémon Go players parked outside his house early Saturday morning for criminals, a Palm Coast, Florida man opened fire on their vehicle. The teens escaped unscathed. The car, not so much.
This week the Tampa Bay Times published a bonkers story that is so exceptionally Floridian that I have to share it with you all. It features partying, foreclosures, drugs, The Undertaker, racketeering, and a cosmetic surgeon, among other things.
Florida State spent $234 apiece on 265 rings to commemorate the football team’s ability to beat Miami, South Florida, and Florida last season, according to a purchase order provided by the athletic department.
Florida State’s football team didn’t win a national title, conference championship, or bowl game last season, but the players earned a ring anyway for the distinction of being good in Florida. Congratulations to the good Florida team.
A high school football player is the first person to be criminally charged in a disturbing incident at Florida’s South Fort Myers High School, where between 16 and 25 male students are alleged to have had sex with a 15-year-old female student in a school bathroom. The girl’s family said last week she was previously a…
The shortest distance from Cuba to the United States is about 90 miles across the Florida Strait. By the standards of human-powered sea travel, it’s extremely doable, and it has been done for decades by refugees aboard the most makeshift of watercraft, driven by desperation. In the peak years, tens of thousand of…
The Jaguars’ draft class needs no further analysis. A woman interviewed by a local news station has said all that needs to be said.
Florida State dismissed quarterback De’Andre Johnson yesterday after video from a Tallahassee bar showed why he was arrested in June for battery. Johnson’s lawyer Jose Baez is now attempting to do damage control, calling the punch an “experience” and also claiming that the woman used a racial slur towards Johnson.
Police charged Florida State quarterback De’Andre Johnson with battery last month after he allegedly punched a woman in the face at a Tallahassee bar. Legally, it’s still “alleged,” but today the state attorney’s office released a portion of the surveillance footage. It does indeed appear to show Johnson punching a…