Astros fans: do not eat the yellow snow cones. They are not lemon. (The browns aren't chocolate either.)

A lot of things are going to change under the new sheriff in town in Philadelphia, and on the day of the Chip Kelly's first practice, Eagles players were surprised to learn the training camp menu is a little different.

A.J. Ramos knew he was in trouble when they brought the omelet out on a pizza pan.

Just chalk this one up to unfortunate timing.

Everyone's so damn afraid of carbs. Over ten years after Dr. Atkins' New Diet Revolution warned dieters worldwide about the fattening power of the potato, the low-carb revolution is still in full effect. This is insane, because carbs are delicious. Fuck a protein shake, am I right?

I had a grill—a cheap, off-brand, bizarrely squircle-shaped charcoal kettle job, which I picked up for a few bucks at Big Lots (which, for the unacquainted, is a name for what is left strewn on the landscape when a giant comes lumbering down the mountain, lifts up a Wal-Mart, holds it upside down, and shakes it for a…

You saunter up to the counter at your local Taco Bell, you order your Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco (taking care not to actually say all of that, for fear of creating the accurate impression that you have paid rapt attention to the television advertisements and planned this trip in advance; instead affecting your best…

The first step is accepting that your kitchen is going to be quite literally as smoky as hell, which, owing to the energy-inefficient cooking methods used to incinerate the souls of the damned, can get a bit sooty.