Cristiano Ronaldo Dominated The Euro 2016 Final Without Even Playing

Eventually, as the days become months and months become years after yesterday’s Euro 2016 final, where Portugal bested France in extra time, no one will remember that it was the poorly played—though passionate—conclusion to a tournament that itself was stuffed with teams that played like our endearing though unlovable…

Advertisement

Two Exquisite Flicks Of Feet Gave France The Decisive 2-0 Lead Over Germany

This goal—Antoine Griezmann’s second on the day and the only two of the match that has sent tournament hosts France into the Euro 2016 final—is all about two touches. The first is that lightning-quick little stab of Paul Pogba’s right foot that allows him to burst into space while leaving Shkodran Mustafi for dead and…

Iceland Turn Back Into A Pumpkin, Give Up Four First-Half Goals To France

Iceland headed into their quarterfinal with France on the high of destroying England and sending the over-anxious Anglos into full meltdown mode. The entirety of Iceland has been watching their Viking boys wreck shit and play coherent, organized soccer, and an upset against France would be easily the greatest day in…

Dimitri Payet Saves France's Ass With Late Game-Winning Goal

France at times looked a little tense during their Euro 2016-opening match against Romania, as they created chances at will but couldn’t keep their composure enough to convert them into goals. Late on, they were tied at 1-1, looking for someone to save the day. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that it was Dimitri Payet…

Hatem Ben Arfa Won't Be At The Euros, But Let's Watch Him Flay Defenders Anyway

Overshadowed in the international selection controversy sparked by Eric Cantona’s comments and Karim Benzema’s fanning of the flames was Cantona’s lamentation that Hatem Ben Arfa wasn’t called up for the France team for the Euros. As understandable as the Ben Arfa snub is, it’s still sad. Because Ben Arfa has been…

Karim Benzema Blames Racism—Not His Alleged Involvement In Blackmailing Teammate Over Sex Tape—For Euros Snub

In normal circumstances, Karim Benzema would be at the top of the world right now. Fresh off a great season at Real Madrid that culminated in Champions League glory, he should be getting ready to lead France in the Euro 2016 tournament as the host nation’s best player. Instead, he’ll be watching it all from home.

Bob Bradley's Le Havre Miss Out On Promotion To Ligue 1 By One Goal

Aww hell. Bob Bradley, former USMNT coach, took over French second-division club Le Havre in November and got the team off and running towards promotion to Ligue 1. Heading into today, Le Havre trailed Metz by three points and six goals. To make it to a top European league for the first time, Bradley—who is almost…

Karim Benzema Won't Play For France This Summer Due To Sex Tape Scandal

For as large as the legal ramifications of Karim Benzema’s involvement in the attempted blackmailing of fellow French soccer player Mathieu Valbuena have loomed over the Real Madrid star’s head, the effect the ordeal would have on his international career was also one of his chief concerns. Today he received…

Check Out The Absurd Backheel Volley This French Guy Scored

Boy, do these dudes in France’s lower tiers know how to score wondergoals. After last week’s backheel-to-overhead kick golazo, we now have Jordan Blondel upping the stakes by sizing up a long ball from his own half, and while backpedaling towards goal, kicking the ball in with his heel. From outside the box. On the…

Advertisement

Decision Not To Evacuate Stade de France During Paris Attacks May Have Saved Many Lives

On Friday, at around 9:15 p.m. Paris time—15 minutes into the France-Germany friendly—a man attempted to enter the Stade de France at Gate D, on the stadium’s east side. Under his clothes he wore a vest packed with explosives and metal bolts, meant to kill and maim as many people around him as he could. There were…