Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
I don't know who this player is or how he hurt himself, but I do know this video is about five Leslie Nielsen movies rolled into one. [Via Twitter]
We received a LobsterGram, it's less delicious than a candygram, but it's more fun because it comes with live lobsters. We didn't know what to do with them (before cooking them) so we raced them on the Gawker HQ roof deck. Watch.
Best we can tell, this is from the third level of the German pro basketball system, and that's University of Dayton grad Marcus Johnson going all Tom Chambers on some poor schmo. All 35 fans were thrilled.
That's Robert Allenby with the errant tee shot at the Australian Masters. The man was carted off on a stretcher, bleeding from the head but giving a thumbs up. Allenby made par thanks to the favorable bounce. [AAP]
Last night's South Park featured this spoof of LeBron James's recent commercial. It features BP CEO Tony Hayward intercut with other characters in the midst of existential crises.
No sport lends itself more readily to the splendors of digital video recording than football. And nobody suffered more than football fans when Comcast introduced a schoolmarmish new DVR feature: auto-correction for fast-forwarding.
Supporters of the Chicago Fire put together this impressive tifo (basically the soccer equivalent of those North Korean card stunts) over the weekend featuring Mario, a Koopa Troopa, and one on-target fireball.
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like visiting players at Citizens Bank Park, who, since the Taser incident, are apparently the last line of defense against fans on the field.
Via a two-and-a-half-year-old Hot Clicks post comes this video of MTV "personality" Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi singing the Lucas Prata "hit" "And We Say...Let's Go Mets" which I had never heard of before. Maybe because it's factually untrue.
A guy riding his bike with a shoulder-mounted camera hits an old man. Words are exchanged. Disputation seems inevitable. Then both graciously agree on their mutual culpability and move on. Moral: Old people need to watch where the fuck they're going.
Tom Treebow is a new Squidbillies character scheduled to premiere on the Adult Swim show's July 11 episode. He seems so familiar. [Adult Swim]
Augusta National's authoritarian fussbudgets do not yet hold dominion over the skies, as proved by whoever hired this plane to circle above The Masters today. Also, it's $1 wing night at Déjà Vu. [Video via ESPN, surprisingly.]
Watch as a samurai unsheaths his katana and splits a baseball in twain as it approaches the plate. I think there's something in the rulebooks to prevent this. [TechEBlog]
On his way to leading Springfield Hillcrest to the Missouri state championship, Trey Starks took some time to jump over a much taller opponent for a vicious dunk. It's a recurring thing for him. H/t David K. for the video.
The first time I was ever published in a book was 1997. It was because I'd found Roger Ebert's email and asked him a question.