The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)

"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below] » 12/16/10 6:40pm 12/16/10 6:40pm

Here's Your Infelicitous Turn Of Phrase Of The Day

Ashley Fox, Philadelphia Inquirer: "Michael Vick once fought and electrocuted dogs. Now, as the Eagles' starting quarterback, he is the most electric player in the National Football League." [Inquirer, image via deviantART] » 11/19/10 2:00pm 11/19/10 2:00pm

Philadelphia Inquirer Writer Compares Phillies Loss To 1906 San…

"When it was over, the town was a charred, smoldering mess—a blackened patch of scorched earth that left the survivors shocked and shattered as they tried to figure out what happened and how to move forward." » 10/25/10 9:51pm 10/25/10 9:51pm Interviews Scott Stapp For Some Terrible Reason

I really don't know what to say about this Q&A with Scott Stapp, other than that it's awful and seems to come from a realm of human existence devoid of any sense of irony or hearing. Also, enjoy this video again. [ESPN] » 9/01/10 3:20pm 9/01/10 3:20pm

All The News That's Fit To Analogize Ridiculously To Food

Your food metaphor of the day, courtesy The New York Times: "We all know the cliché that a prosecuting attorney can persuade a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich, but Clemens — and Barry Bonds, with his trial scheduled for next March — are not mere ham sandwiches but rather the prime beef of baseball." » 8/20/10 1:40pm 8/20/10 1:40pm

Drew Brees, Times-Picayune Leave The Yard In Entirely Different Ways

"A packed house at Zephyr Field learned two things Wednesday night. One, that child sexual abuse is a big problem, and two, that New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees can smack home runs from either side of the plate." [Times-Picayune; related] » 4/29/10 4:10pm 4/29/10 4:10pm

Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before

The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective. » 9/10/09 1:50pm 9/10/09 1:50pm

After Unanimous Backlash, Mark Whicker Responds

Though the column was published Monday night, Whicker's Jaycee Dugard column didn't strike the collective nerve of the Internet until today. I got in touch with the OC Register's sports editor, and here's what he and Whicker have to say. » 9/09/09 9:30pm 9/09/09 9:30pm

Nationals' Unexpected Success Sends Washington Post Into A Fugue State

The lede to yesterday's game story: "In the coda of the Passacaglia and Fugue in C minor, composer Johann Sebastian Bach repeats the same chord sequence over and over again, leading the listener to anticipate one resolution ..." [Washington Post] » 8/11/09 4:00pm 8/11/09 4:00pm

Tennessean Brings Out The Dead, Asks About Exciting New Line Of…

Here's the front page of the Tennessean's weekly Davidson A.M. edition, which is one of those zoned supplements that go yellow on your lawn and contain nothing but Zales ads and the occasional fluffy interview with a dead person. » 7/09/09 1:30pm 7/09/09 1:30pm

Canadian Reporters Are Diligent, Agile

To kick off your Thursday morning in the right way, here's one of the world's most dedicated local Canadian reporters. Neither rain, nor sleet, nor snow, nor gloom of night shall keep the broadcaster from his appointed rounds. » 3/13/08 9:15am 3/13/08 9:15am

Pity The Poor Jayhawks Reporter

Is Mark Mangino leaving Kansas to become the new coach at West Virginia? Well, no, obviously. Who would think that? Unfortunately for him, Lawrence Journal-World reporter Ryan Wood, who became the victim of one of them thar hoaxes. » 12/20/07 12:35pm 12/20/07 12:35pm