Halloween Special: Madness! Torture! Applause!

The legendary Grand Guignol Theater in Paris was not a haunted house, but a serious dramatic enterprise that put on gruesome, faux-blood-splattered shows year-round for decades. It featured staged killings, mutilations and scenes of depravity and torture so realistic that audience members often fled the theater in… » 10/31/13 11:36am 10/31/13 11:36am

Zombies Vs. Strippers: The Camp Classic That Wasn't

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The contemporary Halloween dilemma—clambering for something that’s somehow both sexy and spooky—is a painful reminder of the biggest fumble of our young careers. Last year, amidst the chaos of our mid-twenties, we were handed the creative reins to a real cinematic monster: Zombies Vs. Strippers, a low-budget,… » 10/31/13 10:45am 10/31/13 10:45am

Dolphins Lineman Richie Incognito Is Big-Time Man-Crushing On Jake Long…

Jake Long, the No. 1 overall pick by Miami in 2008, is presently an ex-Dolphin, via free agency. This does not sit well with Richie Incognito, the fellow Dolphins o-lineman (above, right). Long (above, left) may have been banged up with sundry injuries the past couple of years, but if he would come back to the ’Fins,… » 3/16/13 6:45pm 3/16/13 6:45pm

Tim Duncan And Tony Parker Mock-Executed Their Referee Nemesis Joey…

From what we can tell, this photo only started making the rounds yesterday, even though the Spurs night out on Halloween had been well-documented otherwise. These are the same costumes Tim Duncan and Tony Parker wore then—Duncan as the Punisher, because of course he'd pick a relatively obscure comic book antihero as… » 12/01/12 9:45am 12/01/12 9:45am

How To Carve A Pumpkin: A Guide For Terrible, Drunk Parents

It's Halloween, which means that it's time to dress your children up in cosplay costumes and send them out into a dark neighborhood, asking neighbors for things to put inside their mouths. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? Anyway, before trick-or-treating, you have to buy a pumpkin and carve it. That takes jussssst… » 10/31/12 1:01pm 10/31/12 1:01pm