The Stars and Stripes, a paper distributed overseas for American military and its families, reports that some members of the U.S. military are buying dirt cheap knockoff MLB, NFL, and NBA merch and sending it stateside so it can be marked up and sold for profit. And for a minute there I thought Steve Nash played for a team called the Nuns.

The reporters became suspicious when they bought a Jim Brown jersey for $15 labeled as "authentic" from a vendor near Camp Casey in Tongduchon, South Korea. And, see, it's totally not the same jersey that sells for $284.99 on NFL Shop. They noted it looked like a Reebok jersey, which sold for $125, which is getting closer to being not at all illegal. And yet ... the tag ... it says ... GASP!

The reporters found discrepancies in the jersey they bought and the unis on NFL Shop, including:

• A logo on the neckline
• Shorter sleeves
• Name on the back
• Jersey has three neckholes

Well, at least the first three are true. A simple Google search shows that Jason Chimera is actually a hockey player.

So, Korean authorities are not going after any particular soldiers involved in any jerseynanigans (loosely translated threat: "just don't do it anymore, m'kay?"), but I wouldn't be surprised if the NFL suspended them for six games apiece.

South Korean Police Put Out Warning Over Fake Pro Sports Jerseys [Stars and Stripes]

I didn't wear a diaper while conducting this interview, and that was a mistake. Listen to me bring up the time he was accused of throwing his girlfriend off a balcony in 1968. You can practically hear my bowels releasing as I try and phrase the question. Anyway, here's Jim Brown on a number of topics:

Did he bite a guy's finger off when he stuck it in his facemask? "No, but I did bite the hand that was trying to gouge out my eyes… the eyes are very vulnerable." I agree.

On Donte' Stallworth: "I think that he got off beautifully. I think that he's a very fortunate young man."

On Eric Mangini: "For the first time, we have a coach who will dominate the scene." Especially at local bakeries.

Did the flamethrower he used in The Running Man actually shoot flames? "Yes."

Did he keep it? "My personal desire was not to have a flamethrower."

Does he wish more black people played lacrosse? "No."

Can you ever be too old to wear a kufi? "Yep."

Does he still rollerskate like he did on CHiPs? "No."

On in-line skating: "I think the rollerblading is out now. I think it's going back to traditional skates."

Does he regret naming his childhood gang the Gaylords? "I can laugh at it with you because it's a strange name for young men to choose who are straight." That it is.

How does he respond to criticism about his personal history? "I chose to physically go to jail rather than take an assignment that was undignified to me. And so, when I voluntarily become incarcerated… then I've paid my dues."

Can I have just one rib? "Chris Rock, man."

This week's Deadcast is available for your listening pleasure right here. You can also find the new Deadcast in the iTunes Music Store here (should be up shortly).

Also, Mr. Brown's PR company asked that we plug his appearance at the Sports Legends Challenge event at the Atlantis in the Bahamas on September 14th to 17th, also featuring Joe Namath (kissing booth!), Mike Ditka, Troy Aikman, Dr. J, Jerry West, Reggie Jackson, and more. Visit this site to find out more.

Got a question/comment you need read over the air next week? Send it to me here. Special thanks to Liberated Syndication for hosting us. Now sit back, relax, and listen as I curl into the fetal position.