•Charlie Davies shattered his leg and fractured his face and arm. A doctor says recovery will take 6-to-12 months, making the World Cup an improbability. But things could have been a lot worse. For another passenger, they were.

•The Yankees are leaning toward going with a three-man rotation in the ALCS, keeping Joba Chamberlain in the bullpen. Considering ESPN actually put him in their Bodies Issue, the less exposure for Joba, the better.

•It's clear now that the real Gilbert Arenas is dead, and has been replaced with Bizarro Gilbert. He was fined $25k for refusing to talk to the media.

•Billy Wagner might hang it up, saying "[he's] got nothing left to accomplish." I agree. Fourteen September innings for a team that gets swept in the first round is truly the pinnacle from which to retire.

•Billy Gillispie settled with Kentucky for $3 million over his dismissal, even though he was working without a contract. Wonder where your donations are going, alumni? It ain't building new dorms; it's stuff like paying millions to someone who was legally owed nothing.

•Is a Greek basketball team sending death threats to the agent of an American player clamoring for unpaid wages? Sounds fair, if we can threaten Jake Tsakalidis for overpaid wages.

•Finally, it's like a BCS meeting, but with monkeys! So...it's like a BCS meeting.

For those who dare to live outside New York, here's a sports radio primer to catch you up: Francesa believes Chamberlain's future is in the late innings, serving as Mariano Rivera's setup man before taking the closer's mantle himself, instead of being a starter. For this season, at the very least, that argument makes sense. When Chien-Ming Wang returns, the Yankees will have five starters besides Chamberlain — Sabathia, Pettite, Wang, Burnett, Hughes — and in the playoffs, only three will be required. Why not shift Chamberlain back to his old role and shorten the game?

That's Francesa's position, and any caller would need sound reasoning to talk him out of it. But when one — Alex from Bedminster — phoned in Wednesday to say that Chamberlain has been one of the five best pitchers in baseball since he's become a starter, Francesa wasn't having it. For the record, Chamberlain has an ERA of 3.97 this year. He started 12 games last year and came in relief 30 times for a 2.60 ERA. In his rookie season, he sported a 0.38 ERA in 19 relief appearances.

A transcript of about five minutes from Francesaland, starting with the call and continuing after Alex was unceremoniously muzzled (audio here):

What are you talking about? Where are you getting that from? Five pitchers in MLB? There's three of them in this town. What are you talking about? His ERA this year is 4! You're out of your mind. Alex, you are lost. Wait, you're telling me, there are five — wait a second, Alex, there are five starting pitchers who have better statistics than Joba Chamberlain as a starting pitcher, you're trying to tell me that? Wait, wait, wait. Don't give me, since he's become a starter. Don't give me since he's become a starter. Give me the fact that you're trying to tell me that right now, he's one of the five or six best starting pitchers in baseball? Wait. What are you going off of, the basis of 30 innings? Hughes is a starter! Alex, Alex, Alex, wait a second, Joba, wait a second, Alex, what's Joba's ERA this year?

Wait, wait a second, ANDY PETTITE IS A STARTING PITCHER! Andy Pettite's a starting pitcher who's won over 200 games! What are you talking about? Andy Pettite can't pitch the eighth! Hey, Alex: Andy Pettite can't pitch the eighth inning! Get rid of him, get rid of him, get me the Joba stats for his career. I'll teach Alex a lesson here and show you the difference in the statistics since he's gone from being a relief pitcher to a starting pitcher. Why bring up Andy Pettite? He can't pitch the eighth inning. Andy Pettite! What is Andy Pettite, at the end of his career, after being a starting pitcher for 15 years, have to do with this? Why don't you bring up Maddux? Or Randy Johnson? Andy Pettite! What the hell does Andy Pettite have to do with this? Andy Pettite. And you're going to try to tell me, I don't know what world Alex lives in, that right now, Joba Chamberlain's one of the top starting pitchers in Major League Baseball? Where? He can't get through the fifth inning!

I'll go over each of his starts with you, where do you want to compare him to? Halladay's pitching today, you want to compare him to him? Santana's pitching tonight, you want to compare him to him? You want to compare him to Porcello's last five starts for the Tigers this afternoon? Get me Porcello's last five starts, he's pitching today, we'll compare them to Joba Chamberlain's. There's a guy no one's even heard of! How 'bout Greinke? You want to bring him up, at 9-1 with an ERA under 1? Joba's one of the five or six — come on, what is he talking about? Guy's got a 4 ERA, can't get out of the fifth inning. You want to talk about his hits per innings, strikeouts per innings, walks per innings, as a starter vs. reliever? You think you're looking at the same pitcher? You live in Neverneverland! You're not even looking at the same guy.

Tyler Kepner, The Times' longtime Yankees beat writer, wrote a more civil and articulate defense of Chamberlain's spot in the rotation, arguing that he's still 23, his starting numbers aren't that bad and finding a serviceable relief pitcher is much easier than cultivating an ace. Both sides have merit. But for the time being, I find myself in Francesa's camp, even if his argument in this case was more style than substance.

Or, in Francesaspeak: Joba Chamberlain is a setup man! He's responsible for the eighth inning! He drives a Dodge Stratus!

Francesa troubled by Joba-Pettite comparison [Watchdog]
Why Should Joba Start? Ask Johan Santana [Bats]

The New York Daily News details how Joba apparently spent most of the night drinking Grey Goose vodka at Dillinger's, a downtown bar, before then hitting the Night Before Lounge, a strip club. That's where he was harassed by at least one Red Sox fan, who got in this zinger, which apparently sent Joba over the edge: "If you played for the Red Sox, you wouldn't be sitting here!" (This was during the ALCS). Chamberlain got into a shouting match with the man, and one of Chamberlain's friends started shoving the Red Sox fan.

Once order was restored, Chamberlain and his five friends stared at the gyrating dancers for nearly 90 minutes before leaving just after midnight. Chamberlain paid the $145 tab and left a $100 tip at the club, where the cover charge is $3, the manager said.

Kat, a regular dancer at the joint, said she didn't even know there was a Yankee in her midst and took no notice of the beef. "I don't pay attention to altercations — unless I start them," said the blond, who took the stage last night in striped prison garb that she seductively shed.

That's some mighty fine reportin' there, Daily News. The Night Before Lounge indeed sounds like a classy joint, and it's no wonder Joba ended up there. Consider this excerpt from a strip club review from the Daily Nebraskan:

Wade: I was very impressed with the Night Before Lounge. The prices for beer were a bit steep, but worth it for the atmosphere and quality performances from the dancers, who were the best I saw that night. They moved sensually and acrobatically from pole to pole, from horizontal to vertical to upside down. The Night Before is a great place for a guys night out: you can't go wrong with beer, football and beautiful women.

Well, apparently you can go a little wrong.

Joba Jawed With Red Sox Fan At Nudie Bar Before He Got Busted [New York Daily News]
The Night Before Lounge

You know the old saying: nothing good ever happens at 1 a.m. in Nebraska. Well, Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain found out the hard way last night, as his evening ended with him in handcuffs.

Joba Chamberlain was arrested for driving under the influence early Saturday morning near his hometown of Lincoln, Neb.

Deborah Collins, a spokeswoman for the Nebraska State Patrol, said that the 23-year-old Chamberlain was pulled over after being observed speeding in a 2006 BMW 750i shortly after 1 a.m. on U.S. 77. Chamberlain was arrested after an odor of alcohol was detected and an open container of alcohol was observed on the front passenger seat.

As if the Yanks weren't having a hard enough time after a disastrous season, and now helplessly watching as their arch rivals rise from the dead in the ALCS.

Charges are expected to be filed on Monday for the 23-year old.

Chamberlain arrested in Nebraska [The LoHud Yankees Blog]

NOOOOOOO! [3:10 To Joba]

"Well, I hooked up with over 62 at least," he said, making reference to Chamberlain's number. "I got slapped a few times and yelled at, too, but I'd say there were about 20 or 30 of them who had no idea who I really was."

Even women who knew Ward wasn't really a Yankee often played along anyway, he said.

"Some of them found it amusing. Some of them didn't even care," he said.

Girls can be so dumb sometimes. It makes me ashamed to be both female and from Jersey. The look-alike, who started his quest in June, was finally busted and released on $10,000 bail. No word on whether he instituted his own Joba rules.

Somewhere the real Joba is wondering why the "I'm Joba" pick-up line doesn't work for him. Maybe he should try it on more girls from Jersey.

One potential bright spot from this injury for the Yankees (and baseball fans everywhere) is that with all the team's pitching problems it may pave the way for a Carl Pavano comeback. The oft-injured, extremely expensive pitcher will make a rehab start for the Trenton Thunder tomorrow night, officially making him the richest man to ever step foot in Trenton, N.J.

Joba Chamberlain to see noted orthopedist James Andrews [NY Daily News]
Joba to get surgery [NYSportsSpace]
Kennedy, Hughes May Save Yankees' Season [Newsday]

The Yankees are now three games back in the AL East (2 behind the Red Sox), and now they've filled the two biggest holes on their team. Outfielder Xavier Nady will provide a huge boost to the lineup and Damaso Marte is the perfect addition to keep Farnsworth off the mound. The 33 year-old lefty has never had an ERA over 3.77 in his seven full seasons.

• Dye's Blast Is the Difference. Jermaine Dye's 22nd home run of the year was a two-run shot off of Todd Jones with two outs in the ninth inning. Bobby Jenks shut down the Tigers in the bottom half of the inning, and the Sox escaped with a 6-5 win over the Tigers. Chicago has now won three straight and Ozzie Guillen is starting to run out of reasons to be all pissed off.

• Speaking of the AL Central... The Twins dropped to three and a half games behind the White Sox after losing their fifth game in a row. Minnesota made it close with two ninth inning runs of their own, but they fell short by a score of 5-4. Cliff Lee improved to a preposterous 14-2, the highest win total in the majors. The All-Star starter truly earned the victory striking out 10 in eight innings of two-run ball.

Chamberlain, who threw 62 pitches in a one-inning debacle against the Blue Jays last week, was limited to 78 pitches on Sunday. Jason Giambi had a tiebreaking homer in the sixth and Bobby Abreu had an upper-deck homer and three RBI.

• Penny Is The New Zito. Barry Zito will no longer be the butt of my jokes. Zito got his second win of the season as the Giants beat the Nationals 6-3. Meanwhile, Brad Penny ran his winless streak to seven starts as the Cubs beat the Dodgers 3-1. Jason Marquis took a two-hitter into the seventh inning and Mark DeRosa was 3-for-4 with a homer for Chicago.

• That's A Three-Game Sweep, For Those Keeping Score At Home . Ryan Howard was 3-for-5 with four RBI and the first three-double game of his career as the Phillies beat the schizophrenic Braves 6-3. Philadelphia has won four straight and 12 of 14.

• Those Lovable, Scuffling Rays. Rays starting pitcher Matt Garza and catcher Dioner Navarro got into it in the dugout during a 6-3 loss to the Rangers. You may remember Navarro for his tackle of Coco Crisp in the Red Sox brawl of last week.

• Wizard Cat Defensive Player Of The Game. Evan Longoria, Tampa Bay Rays. As if stretching to snag a felt mouse, the Rays third baseman displays his flexibility against the Rangers in an (alas) losing cause. Wizard Cat gives this play: Two wands.

Contact Wizard Cat at Wizardcat@live.com

Chamberlain's much-anticipated starting debut didn't go so well: He gave up two runs, one earned, and walked four before being removed in the third after 62 pitches. Alex Rios extended his hitting streak against the Yankees to 24 games and David Eckstein had three RBI as Toronto won 9-3. Roy Halladay (7-5) won his fourth straight decision. Hank Steinbrenner blamed it all on the media, naturally. "Tonight was a creation of the media," he said. "If this had been a first start for any other pitcher on any other team, it wouldn’t have been such a big deal.”

Meanwhile, Martinez (1-0) threw six innings in his return from the disabled list from a hamstring injury, surrendering seven hits, three runs, three walks and striking out three on 109 pitches. He also had two singles and an RBI, the Mets beating the Giants 9-6. Pedro hadn't pitched since April 1. Damion Easley had a three-run double during New York’s eight-run fifth.

• One Town That Won't Let You Down. If the Cubs are going to start swooning, hadn't they better get to it? Before you know it June will be over. Chicago won its ninth straight as Alfonso Soriano had a three-run homer and Mark DeRosa had a two-run shot to lead a 9-6 victory over San Diego. The Cubs have the best record in baseball at 38-21, and even their former players are talking trash.

• Oh Wandy, Well You Came And You Gave Without Taking ... Run-scoring doubles by Lance Berkman and Miguel Tejada and Wandy Rodriguez's six shutout innings in his second start after coming off the disabled list led the Astros over the Pirates 2-0.

• Watchoo Talkin' About, Willis? Jack Cust beat out an infield single in the 11th, driving in Kurt Suzuki from third, as the Athletics beat the Tigers 5-4. Oakland native Dontrelle Willis made his first start and second appearance since coming off the disabled list for the Tigers, pitching four scoreless innings.

• The Bondsification Of Boston. With David Ortiz lost for who-knows-how-long with that wrist injury, The Soxaholic and Boston Sports Blog are both openly speculating on the chances of a certain Mr. Bonds being signed by the Red Sox to fill the void. Whether or not this could actually happen, it's sparked some lively debate with the commenters. Boston beat Tampa Bay 7-4 on Tuesday.

• Wizard Cat Defensive Player Of The Day. Yorvit Torrealba, Colorado Rockies. The Rockies' catcher scored a decent shove to the face and then a fine two-point takedown of the Dodgers' Matt Kemp, following Kemp's strikeout in the eighth inning of Colorado's 3-0 win. Unfortunately that was the end of the action, as everyone else in this benches-clearing "brawl" simply milled about exchanging business cards. Wizard Cat gives this play: Four wands.

At issue is an incident on Thursday in which Chamberlain became somewhat demonstrative — pumping his fist and so forth — after striking out the Indians' David Dellucci.

"That's just not the Yankee way, what Joba did. Let everyone else do that stuff, but not a Yankee," Gossage said by telephone on Saturday. ... "there's no one to pass the torch anymore, no one to teach the young kids how to act. The Mets did a lot of that [celebrating] last year, and look how it came back to haunt them."

Is Gossage predicting a similar collapse by the Yankees? Well, first they have to GET to first. I'm not sure where I stand on the concept of old players coming back and telling current ones how to behave. Isn't that the manager's job? Joe Girardi needs to put a clamp on those antics stat, if that's the kind of team he wants. On the other hand, it's Goose freakin' Gossage, who could still probably kill you with a fresh dinner roll from 20 yards away. I'd probably listen to what he had to say.

Klapisch: Goose Tells Joba To Act Like A Yankee [The Record]

The loss snapped New York's three-game winning streak. Chamberlain struck out two and retired the side in order in the eighth, but Carlos Quentin's one-out double and Crede's line single to center in the ninth did him in. "I only threw one curveball and that's the one that got hit," said Chamberlain, not mentioning his fateful interview with Andrews. "The disappointing part is that I let my team down." The Yankees have been saying for quite some time that the hype surrounding Chamberlain — who has pitched all of 33 1/3 innings in the big leagues — is getting out of control. And now he apparently says something inappropriate to Andrews, and knocks his career off the tracks. Yes, Joba Chamberlain flew too close to the sun, and now must fall back to Earth to fend for himself like other mortals. Pray for him.

• Rags To Riches Story. The tattered David Ortiz jinx jersey — the one that Yankees officials had dug up from beneath their new stadium earlier this month — sold at an eBay auction for $175,100 on Thursday. The Red Sox then went out and lost to the Angels, 7-5, powered by Gary Matthews Jr.'s two-run single in the seventh.

• Frank Is Back. Oakland's cleanup hitter looks familiar ... hey, it's Frank Thomas. The Big Hurt is back, having agreed to terms with the A's after being released Sunday by the Toronto Blue Jays. He went 0-for-3 with two walks, the A's scoring six runs in the first in an 11-2 win over the Twins. Donnie Murphy had solo homers in the fifth and sixth innings.

• Things Looking Up In Washington. Felipe Lopez tied a career high with six RBI thanks to a homer and a two-run single, leading the Nationals past the Mets 10-5. Meanwhile, Elijah Dukes finished his probation by mopping out zoo cages, and should be back soon for Washington.

• Giants Not In Last. Tim Lincecum (4-0, 1.23 ERA) extended his scoreless streak to 16 1/3 innings beating the Padres 1-0. Rich Aurilia homered for the only run. San Diego is 7 1/2 games behind the front-running Diamondbacks in the West.

• Today's Quiz. OK, are the Tigers officially back, or are the Rangers just that bad?

(UPDATE: Andrews says she was talking to her producer, and that Joba's fine.)

But, as 100 Percent Injury Rate points out, the Yankees can't quite compete with some of the other great rookie hazings this year.

They put the Pirates and the Dodgers at the top of the hazing list, and after looking at the Pirates picture, it's difficult to argue:

Baseball players are weird.

Damage From Rookie Hazing Week [100 Percent Injury Rate]