And I just saw Carlos Santana last week at the Fillmore.

E. Santana shook off Miguel Cabrera's two-run homer in the second, and the Angels won it on Gary Matthews Jr's run-scoring single with two out in the ninth. Meanwhile, Willie Randolph lived to see another day as Fernando Tatis and Ramon Castro each had two run-scoring singles for New York, which won for the second time in nine games. But, can anyone tell me why they played in Baltimore?

• And If That's Too Soon, You Can Make It A Minute-And-A-Huff. Oh what a night. Tuesday's Yankees-Orioles game featured nine home runs, 12 pitchers and a 67-minute rain delay, which is always fun. It ended predictably, though, as Aubrey Huff doubled in the 11th to make it 9-9,, then scored the winning run on Alex Cintron's single. Baltimore came back from deficits of 4-0 and 8-4, making steam shoot from Hank Steinbrenner's ears in comical, cartoon-like fashion.

• Tim The Enchanter. In case you didn't know, Tim Lincecum is 7-1, 3-0 over his past four starts, after getting the win in the Giants's 6-3 victory over Arizona. Bengie Molina and Jose Castillo had homers for El Gigantes.

• M-M-M-My Kuroda. Sean Gallagher got the win and Aramis Ramirez and Kosuke Fukudome had run-scoring hits in a three-run seventh to lead the Cubs over the Dodgers 3-1. Hiroki Kuroda (2-4), who was Alfonso Soriano's teammate with the Hiroshima Carp in 1997, took the loss, although he left with a 1-0 lead.

• Mets Geek Changes Name To Rays Geek. Hey wait, can they do that? Because their chosen team "sucks," as they put it, popular New York Mets blog Mets Geek has changed its name to Rays Geek, and will now follow the Tampa Bay Rays. This has to be a first, doesn't it? Peculiar, especially since they've decided to keep their old logo, Mr. Met.

• Wizard Cat Defensive Player Of The Day. Brian Roberts, Guillermo Quiroz, Baltimore Orioles. It's common knowledge that Wizard Cat loves the 4-2-5 double play almost as much as he loves Little Friskies Seafood Sensations®. And all the better when it comes against A-Rod. And when it occurs with nobody out in the 11th? Just pure magic. Wizard Cat gives this play: Four wands.

Contact Wizard Cat at Wizardcat@live.com

The Mets gave up a lot, but not so much that Metsblog is worried. They're still trying to figure out a "six-or-seven year contract extension," which means it's possible, when this contract is over, we will be on our 46th president, and Citi Field will already be outdated.

Twins Agree To Deal Santana To Mets [USA Today]

For all the talk that blogs and talk radio spread unsubstantiated rumors and hearsay, just about every team has been associated with a Johan Santana trade, when, in fact, nobody knows anything. The Yankees, with Hank Steinbrenner doing his undignified gallop to catch up with this father's ghost, have dropped out (until they haven't), the Red Sox are waiting around and now the dipping their toes in. Strangely, they're resistant to add Jose Reyes to a trade; we can't imagine why. There isn't a single story about baseball in the last month that hasn't included Johan Santana's name, and not a single thing has happened. Nobody knows anything.

Report: Everyone Interested In Santana [The Sports Hernia]

The most enjoyable, ludicrous piece of trade speculation has to come from Bob Sansevere in the Pioneer-Press, who says the Twins would be crazy not to make the following trade:

Red Sox Get:
Johan Santana
Joe Nathan
Carlos Silva

Twins Get:
Jacoby Ellsbury
Dustin Pedroia
Jonathan Papelbon
Jon Lester
Clay Buchholz

As Fire Joe Morgan points out, sheesh, he's right: The Twins would be insane not to take that deal! Of course, Theo Epstein might not be up for such a trade, especially considering the fact that Carlos Silva is a free agent, something one would presume a columnist for a Minnesota newspaper would know. But the Twins have to go for it, nevertheless!

Um, Bob ... [The Dish]
Blockbuster! [Fire Joe Morgan]

Blyleven, of course, is now a broadcaster for the Twins, famed for saying "fuck" on the air at least twice, and also for the following comment, which I hope is true: Earlier this season, Blyleven and broadcasting partner Dick Bremer were discussing bowling, and Bremer said that he had his name on several bowling shirts. Blyleven responed: "So you have 'Dick' on your shirt?" Blyleven, who won 287 games in a 22-year career, is the only eligible member of the 3,000-strikeout club not in the Hall of Fame. This annoys Twins fans no end, and to tell you the truth I'm not exactly thrilled about it myself. Of course, he also once gave up 50 home runs in a season, which is still the major league record. Fun fact: Santana is 20-2 with a 1.85 ERA in 28 August starts since 2003. He gave up only two hits on Sunday — both by Sammy Sosa — and improved to 13-9. Mike Cuddyer's home run provided the only run of the game. Hey, is that new stadium ever going to get built, by the way?

• Frasier Crane Approves (But Will Not Be Watching). The Seattle Mariners: Not playoff bound? The Fighting Ms are a half game ahead of the Yankees in the wild card race, and two behind the Angels in the AL West. But Seattle plays 17 of its next 20 on the road, and I don't think that any are against the Devil Rays. Still, they're one of the hottest teams in baseball, so who knows? Jose Guillen's two-run homer in the first led an 11-5 win over the White Sox on Sunday.

• It Came From The Bottom Of The Sea. Hmm, was I just besmirching the Devil Rays? Tampa Bay 4, Cleveland 3 in 12 innings. Joel Guzman game-winning single in the 12th.

• 40 Is The New 12. John Smoltz struck out 12 to pass Phil Niekro on the team career strikeout list, Atlanta beating Arizona 6-2 behind Mark Teixeira's two homers. Smoltz now has 2,920 strikeouts. Still, the Diamondbacks have won 10 of their 11 series since the All-Star break.

• The Thrill Is Gone. I am shocked to learn that Philadelphia blew a 4-0 lead en route to an 8-4 loss to the Pirates. Matt Kata's three-run double in a seven-run seventh inning was the highlight.

It's tough to find a man on the planet who doesn't love Alyssa Milano. Her allure is timeless, considering her career ascension has matched up perfectly with most 30-something men's sexual awakenings. Think about it: As a teenager in the 80s, she was the perfect combination of girl you'd take to the ninth grade farewell dance and girl most of you'd inconspicuously fondle at the mall. In her 20s, she wasted no time shedding her image as a child star and makes the leap to lesbianic vampire movies, Poison Ivy II and "Melrose Place." (That trifecta alone guaranteed she'd have many mop socks named after her. Ask my father. He always wears his Alyssa Milanos on Sundays to do yard work.)

Now, in her 30's she's become the real life Annie Savoy, using her lady cave to assemble what would've been one of the more dominating fantasy baseball staffs in ... 2003: Brad Penny, Barry Zito, and Carl Pavano. It's true. Alyssa Milano's vagina's 2003 WHIP would've been 1.24.

Lately, it's appeared that Alyssa has put herself on the DL when it comes to bedding players (perhaps the coital equivalent of "dead arm"), reserving most of her player admiration to her MLB blog and her MLB lingerie line or whatever that is. This cannot last forever, and the more and more baseball games Milano attends, the closer she gets to fully recovering . She's so riled up right now that anytime she drives past a ballpark you could probably drown mice in her underwear.

So, this week, I'm blowing off some Teen Steam, slapping at my Tony Danza, and calculating odds on the next MLB baseball player to have sex with Alyssa Milano.

Let's touch 'em all, after this Moop.

Johan Santana:6/1

Her affinity for starting pitchers is well known, and she's referred to Santana as "dreamy." Although Santana's a married man, it has to betough to turn down the advances of Alyssa Milano. But Santana should steer clear of her, lest he suffer the Milano curse that has befallen most of the pitchers she's doinked. Chances are, Santana will resist, but should some marital trouble suddenly arise, don't be surprised if Milano starts singing the praises of skyway sex on her blog.

Chad Cordero: 3/1

Although Milano claims to be cosmic chums with Dmitri Young, I'm thinking their relationship would fall into the category of platonic: She'll talk to Meech about his game, her love life, her family; he'll talk to her about his combustible brother, "The Man," hot wings. But Dmitri will also attempt to play matchmaker for Milano, and what better guy to set her up with than the Nationals crooked-capped closer, Chad Cordero? Cordero would be delighted to have such a lady, and although she won't be interested at first, Milano will eventually succumb to Cordero's chicano-esque charm and the fact that he calls her his ruca. But Milano should beware the Havoc-like lure of Chad — and, most important, she shouldn't drink too many tequila shots with him and his buddies then boozily ask how to become a member of his gang. (See: Phillips, Bijou.)

Bobby Abreu: 5/1

Alyssa favors plate discipline over the allure of the inside the park home run, which is something she gushed about about regarding The Meat Hook's five-pitch at bat in the All-Star game's last inning. And even though he's having an off year, Abreu is usually masterful about working a count. Plus Abreu loves Mediterranean white girls, as some of the strippers at Scores could attest to first hand. But he also has a problem with his girlfriends having sex on film, which doesn't bode well for Alyssa since Embrace of the Vampire still pops up on Cinemax every once in while.

Matt Kemp, James Loney, D.J. Houlton...: 2/1

A lifelong Dodgers fan, it seems like a lock that she'd go after somebody she could root for all of the time. But with that whole Brad Penny situation still fresh, she probably won't start dating one of his teammates too soon. However, she's also a gamer, and what better way to acclimate some of the younger talent to the Major League life than by offering her services. Let's just hope she does them individually and doesn't cave into the pressure from some of the rook's to play "Blue Devil Broom Closet." That could end badly for everybody.