Big Rack Attack
We've had an absurd dedication around these parts with bringing you the latest developments in the career of Jose Lima. Is it his infectious ebullience on the mound? Or the fact that his wife is stacked? Hard to say. When last we heard from Lima Time, he was still
whooping it up with the Kia Tigers in Korea. But America's crisis of confidence is over, our economy ready to reverse course and rocket skyward and shit is ready to pop off, son, because Lima Time is back on our shores! U! S! A! U! S! A!
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yeah, but where's his wife?
A few weeks ago, it seemed, the world was faced with the sad prospect of bidding farewell to Limatime when reports surfaced out of Korea that he
had been released by the Kia Tigers. Mope no longer, lovers of exuberant pitchers with stacked wives, for not only is Limatime born anew with the Tigers, HE A WINNAR!
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lima time
This is a sad thing for us all to come to terms with, but Jose Lima — along with his, uh,
ample wife — is not going to be in the majors next season. But worry not: There's always Korea.
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old pitchers never die
So here's a question: Whatever happened to Jose Lima? Everybody's favorite 7.80 ERA pitcher with the rather disproportioned wife seemed to have vanished after being mercifully released by the Mets last year. But you cannot keep Jose Lima down. You underestimate Jose Lima at your own risk.
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baseball
As has been pointed out by
Fark and a few other places, it appears that the famous dress worn by Jose Lima's somewhat heavily busomed wife when he sang the national anthem a few years ago — she was actually cropped out of accompanying photo by MLB.com, but we bring her back because we are
all about truth — is
now available for purchase on eBay.
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yard work
We are far from the first people to scream the genius of
Yard Work, but we still kinda want to be the ones who do it the loudest. Calling the site "satirical" isn't doing it justice; the site is brilliant in mad, somewhat terrifying ways. (We were unable to read this week's story about Rickey Henderson in
The New Yorker without Yard Work's voice in our head:
"Pay Rickey!") Its archives are deep, massive and hypnotic.
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Deadspin
jose lima
lima time is over
baseball
