To remind: he made $4.3 million for not filing his papers.

The Mavs and Nets needed Van Horn, whose new contract will pay him $75,439 per day over the final 57 days of the regular season, or $148,275 for each of the Nets' final 29 games. Before the NBA would approve the deal, league officials had to be convinced by agent David Falk and his client that Van Horn would report to New Jersey and make an honest attempt at a comeback.

See, now, that's a nice gig. We also have not filed our retirement papers and encourage any NBA team looking for salary cap relief to call us. We will make an "honest attempt" to make the team.

This completely screws up the ESPN Trade Machine, by the way. Being able to just sign random retired players for whatever amount you want is pretty difficult to simulate.

Jason Kidd Trade Good For Van Horn [St. Lake Tribune]
Doing The Deal And Dishing The Dirt [Blog Maverick]

But Idolator has found something even better, a song about the 2002 New Jersey Nets — completely with Keith Van Horn-related freestyling! — by rapper Khia called "The Nets Are Back." The song is bad enough, but Idolator points out that the original version of Khia's song is called "My Neck, My Back" and has a bit more going on than praising Van Horn's jumper.

All you ladies pop your p***y like this
Shake your body, don't stop, don't miss
All you ladies pop your p***y like this
Shake your body, don't stop, don't miss
Just do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now
Lick it good suck this p***y, just like you should
Right now, Lick it good
suck this p***y just like you should
My Neck, my back
Lick my p***y and my crack

Though, all matters considered, it does have a certain Van Hornian flair.

What A Good Sport: Khia Gives It Up For The Nets [Idolator]

(UPDATE: From The Smoking Gun, we learn we are causing trouble with the wrong female rapper.)