Kobe Bryant Airballs From Siberia As The Lakers Lose by 34

The other day my colleague Albert Burneko worried that Nick Young's return had improbably elevated the Lakers from "gonzo terribleness to bland mediocrity." Worried because the Lakers' spectacular brand of suck has been the most entertaining subplot early in this surprisingly dismal NBA season, and that would be… » 11/22/14 2:54pm 11/22/14 2:54pm

Kobe And The Lakers Do Dumb Shit; Anthony Davis Dismisses Them

The ridiculous, bad-basketball-playin'-ass Lakers lost again last night, 109-102 in New Orleans, to fall to 1-7. Basically, they performed how you might expect them to on the second night of a road back-to-back: they won the first quarter with some fluky hot shooting, then sagged badly in the middle quarters, then did… » 11/13/14 11:24am 11/13/14 11:24am

All Hail Kobe Bryant And The Lakers, Lords Of Madness

First things first: You don't get to miss more shots than anybody else in NBA history by being bad at basketball. That record would be Larry Hughes's if he didn't, y'know, suck at everything, and in this sense, the all-time missed-shots record is a perverse monument to Kobe Bryant's greatness. He missed more shots… » 11/12/14 2:03pm 11/12/14 2:03pm

The Lakers Are Still Jump-Kicking Themselves In The Face

A funny thing happened on Halloween: Perhaps inspired by the children of America— who'd spent the evening taking to the streets in elaborate costumes, pretending to be ghosts and ghouls and ninja turtles rather than little kids—the Lakers decided to dress up as a team that can wring success out of the bad, dumb… » 11/03/14 11:17am 11/03/14 11:17am

Oh Man, The Lakers Are In Big, Big Trouble

Yep, the Lakers really are going with this whole "play terrible basketball on purpose" thing. Last night against the Rockets, they attempted 10 three-pointers as a team—two more than Houston's Trevor Ariza fired up by himself—and sent the Rockets to the free-throw line 50 times. They did both of those things on… » 10/29/14 10:55am 10/29/14 10:55am

Kobe And Dwight Howard Talk Shit To Each Other, Get Double Technicals

Dwight Howard left the Lakers a season ago, but because of Kobe Bryant's achilles injury, the two haven't played against each other since their ill-fated partnership blew up in everybody's face. If you thought things between the two were all good, well, you don't know Kobe Bryant very well. » 10/29/14 1:26am 10/29/14 1:26am

Jeanie Buss Goes In On "Losers" Who Don't Want To Play With Kobe

Things aren't going so great for the Los Angeles Lakers right now. Their head coach is dead set on implementing a caveman brand of basketball that may very well turn the Lakers into the worst team in the NBA, and a recent story by ESPN's Henry Abbott painted Kobe Bryant as a self-sabotaging sociopath whom nobody wants… » 10/23/14 1:54pm 10/23/14 1:54pm