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New York, 8:37 PM
Mon Nov 9
16 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #kurtwarner more →

    Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard

    Guy That Enabled Kurt Warner's Career Retires

    Warner Loves And Leaves 49ers, Agrees To Makeup Sex With Cardinals

    Everybody Loves Kurt

    Kurt Warner Operates On A Higher Moral Plane Than You And I

    Your Morning After Super Bowl Cardinals-Were-Hosed Post

    God Still Undecided On Who To Root For In Super Bowl

    The Ballad Of Brenda And Kurtis The Stock Boy

    Religion, Sports, And Visanthe Shiancoe Has A Bible Verse Written WHERE?

    The Meat Bikini Is Delicious, Possibly NSFW
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of chilltown chilltown
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Apparently to write for Deadspin 2009 one must have a name befitting a muckraker. I'm considering changing my name to Upton.
     Reply
    chilltown was starred chilltown was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Your nuanced understanding of modern NFL offensive strategy impresses me, son. You're hired.

    - Art Shell
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of DirkToberFest DirkToberFest
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Kurt Warner is sooooooooooo old that he doesn't realize the forward pass was invented yet.

    Take That!
     Reply
    Theodore Donald Kerabatsos promoted this comment DirkToberFest was starred DirkToberFest was unstarred
    Image of SavetoFavorites SavetoFavorites
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest:

    Kurt Warner is soooooooooooo old that he runs the Saber-Toothed Wildcat offense.

    Hooah! Try the veal piccata!
     Reply
    FlakJack promoted this comment SavetoFavorites was starred SavetoFavorites was unstarred
    Image of SavetoFavorites SavetoFavorites
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest:

    Kurt Warner is soooooooooo old that he helped write the Cardinal playbook, Cardinal fight song, and Cardinal sins.

    Stick around for Ashford and Simpson!
     Reply
    FlakJack promoted this comment SavetoFavorites was starred SavetoFavorites was unstarred
    Image of Theodore Donald Kerabatsos Theodore Donald Kerabatsos
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is soooooo old, Jaycee Dugard doesn't even need Mark Whicker to tell her who he is.

    Face!
     Reply
    Theodore Donald Kerabatsos was starred Theodore Donald Kerabatsos was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is so old, his wife wears her hair like it's 1982!
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of heartbreakturnip heartbreakturnip
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Yo momma's so old, she sat on that fade route and flattened it.
     Reply
    heartbreakturnip was starred heartbreakturnip was unstarred
    Image of Chamomiles Davis Chamomiles Davis
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is sooooo old he lettered at Pangaea High School.
     Reply
    Chamomiles Davis was starred Chamomiles Davis was unstarred
    Image of David Hume David Hume
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is sooooooooo sold that he remembers when Jesus invented getting nailed on a crossing route.
     Reply
    Edited by David Hume at 09/22/09 2:03 PM David Hume was starred David Hume was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is so old, his high school games were often interrupted by stampeding dinosaurs, per the tenets of his religious sect.
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of BullfightsOnAcid BullfightsOnAcid
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is so old that he calls the Statue of Liberty play the Collosus of Rhodes play.

    Don't forget to spay and neuter your cat or dog!
     Reply
    BullfightsOnAcid was starred BullfightsOnAcid was unstarred
    Image of BullfightsOnAcid BullfightsOnAcid
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is so old that he still thinks the annual Thankgiving Day game is played between the Lions and the Christians.

    Don't forget to tip your wait staff. They work hard out there.
     Reply
    Edited by BullfightsOnAcid at 09/22/09 5:56 PM BullfightsOnAcid was starred BullfightsOnAcid was unstarred
    Image of BullfightsOnAcid BullfightsOnAcid
    09/22/09

    @DirkToberFest: Kurt Warner is so old he still thinks touchdowns are worth VI points.

    I'd like to take this moment to acknowledge the passing of Dimebag Darrell. A moment of silence please.
     Reply
    BullfightsOnAcid was starred BullfightsOnAcid was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    F. Scott Fitzgerald blogged, "The born again aren't like you and me."
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of Stev D Stev D
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Ellafitz1: Throw Larry the bee-doop-a-beedoop-badda-badda-zing-zang... lang Ball!
     Reply
    Stev D was starred Stev D was unstarred
    Image of Benamed Benamed
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: FScottfitz1: So we beat on, boats against the current, dropping back ceaselessly to pass -- to fucking Tim Hightower when Larry is WIDE OPEN DOWNFIELD
     Reply
    Stev D promoted this comment Edited by Benamed at 09/22/09 1:13 PM Benamed was starred Benamed was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: +1
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of SavetoFavorites SavetoFavorites
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: JfitzKenn1: And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do to make Kurt Warner stop checking down like a little salt-and-pepper bitch.
     Reply
    Stev D promoted this comment Edited by SavetoFavorites at 09/22/09 1:19 PM SavetoFavorites was starred SavetoFavorites was unstarred
    Image of Chris Hanson's Axe Chris Hanson's Axe
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: PatrickFitz1: We are currently investigating claims that Larry did not receive the ball enough.
     Reply
    Chris Hanson's Axe was starred Chris Hanson's Axe was unstarred
    Image of dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: Fritz21: I am so fucking hammered I want to kiss Larry Fitzgerald. Go Vols!
     Reply
    dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac was starred dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac was unstarred
    Image of Steve U Steve U
    09/22/09

    @Stev D: EpilepFitz1: Kurt Warner needs to euhggh . . . euhgh huhg fsfhu twhach . . . THUD

    /silence
    //rapid convulsions
    ///foaming at mouth

    ////divine disease'd
     Reply
    Steve U was starred Steve U was unstarred
    Image of SavetoFavorites SavetoFavorites
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Needs more Brenda Warner reaction shots.
     Reply
    FlakJack promoted this comment SavetoFavorites was starred SavetoFavorites was unstarred
    Image of ClueHeywood ClueHeywood
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Kurt Warner plays like a damn 80 year old!

    80 year olds don't have a 92.3% completion percentage on bowel movements, much less NFL passes.
     Reply
    ClueHeywood was starred ClueHeywood was unstarred
    Image of Chris Hanson's Axe Chris Hanson's Axe
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    Put in Lineart!
     Reply
    Chris Hanson's Axe was starred Chris Hanson's Axe was unstarred
    Image of Rock, Flag and Eagle Rock, Flag and Eagle
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    "Kurt warner needs 2 stop bein a scary ass & throw the ball deep 2 my brother!damn this is annoying 2 watch!he trhwos 2 the rb's 2 damn much!"

    Twitter translator:

    "I'm emphatically concerned that Kurt Warner purchased that 'Scary Movie' mask for Halloween this year. It's far too antiquated for anyone's tastes! Moreover, I'm experiencing quite the glare on my television screen due to a high eastward sun glare. On a lighter note, my belly is growling for some roast beef. I might need to venture to Arby's for two sandwiches, but that might be over the limit of my stomach's cholesterol intake."
     Reply
    Chris Hanson's Axe promoted this comment Rock, Flag and Eagle was starred Rock, Flag and Eagle was unstarred
    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    He stole the "OLD ASS MAN" line from my eulogy for Charles Nelson Reilly.
     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
    Image of SavetoFavorites SavetoFavorites
    09/22/09

    @Hatey McLife:

    +1 pair of twisted eyeglasses
     Reply
    FlakJack promoted this comment SavetoFavorites was starred SavetoFavorites was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    09/22/09

    In reply to Somebody Get Larry Fitzgerald's Brother A Clipboard
    "YOU OLD ASS MAN, THROW HIM THE DAMN BALL" is one of the lines from Marcus' dirty version of "This Old Man." He just forgot to add the "knick-knack, fuckin' sack" part.
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of ClueHeywood ClueHeywood
    06/13/09

    In reply to Guy That Enabled Kurt Warner's Career Retires
    You could also call him "Guy that Destroyed Matt Leinart's Career," but I think that was Nick Lachey.
     Reply
    ClueHeywood was starred ClueHeywood was unstarred
    Image of mikedrawcar mikedrawcar
    03/04/09

    In reply to Warner Loves And Leaves 49ers, Agrees To Makeup Sex With Cardinals
    Actually, the 49ers just sent Leinart brochures for all the colleges and universities in the bay area.
     Reply
    mikedrawcar was starred mikedrawcar was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    03/04/09

    In reply to Warner Loves And Leaves 49ers, Agrees To Makeup Sex With Cardinals
    Photo Caption: Are You There God? It's Me, Warner.
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of Juancho Juancho
    03/04/09

    @Weed Against Speed: also: Did YOU forget to watch the Super Bowl or something?
     Reply
    Juancho was starred Juancho was unstarred
    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    03/04/09

    In reply to Warner Loves And Leaves 49ers, Agrees To Makeup Sex With Cardinals
    Warner Loves And Leaves 49ers, Agrees To Makeup Sex With Cardinals


    Vernon Davis will track him down and hate fuck him.

     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
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