Fictional Lasers, Ranked

So the Navy has a laser cannon now. It's cool, I guess, except that it does not shoot any beams of light or make a "pew pew" noise or do any of the cool shit that a laser is supposed to do, really. Fictional lasers are much better. This is a ranking of fictional lasers. » 12/11/14 3:55pm 12/11/14 3:55pm

Lions Catch Laser-Pointing Jabroni, Ban Him Indefinitely

Mark Beslach, the guy who bragged on Twitter about shining a laser pointer in Kyle Orton's face at the Bills-Lions game, was caught. Police charged him with disorderly conduct, and the Lions banned him indefinitely from Ford Field. » 10/09/14 4:10pm 10/09/14 4:10pm

Bills Say Someone Shined Laser Pointer On Them; Guy Tweets He Did It

Though the Bills took down the Lions in Detroit yesterday, not all was beer and skittles. During the game, quarterback Kyle Orton and holder Colton Schmidt complained to officials that someone had shined a laser pointer in their faces. And a dude on Twitter claimed to be the one behind it. » 10/06/14 12:20pm 10/06/14 12:20pm

Russian Keeper Gets Laser Shined In His Face; Algeria Score

As Russian goalkeeper Igor Akinfeev went up to try and break up a cross, he had what appeared to be a laser shined in his face. Algeria's Islam Slimani ended up heading the ball in to knot the match at one in the 60th minute. Conspiracy theories go below. » 6/26/14 5:44pm 6/26/14 5:44pm

Navigating a Maze of Real Lasers is Harder Than You'd Think

Look — We all love lasers. And we all agree that mazes made out of lasers, a la the movie Entrapment, are awesome. What you may not realize is that navigating a laser maze in real life is harder than you’d think. » 7/16/13 2:07pm 7/16/13 2:07pm

There Is A Rich History Of Fans Shining Laser Pointers In Athletes'…

Perhaps you heard about the latest hockey dad behavior, in which a maybe-well-meaning father shined a laser pointer in the eyes of the other team's goalie. But you probably hadn't heard that there's a long, fine tradition of shining lasers in pro athletes' eyes. Cristiano Ronaldo, naturally, gets it the worst. Josh… » 3/09/12 10:05am 3/09/12 10:05am