Big Ben And The Jets Tried To Out-Suck Each Other

Ben Roethlisberger came into today's game on a historically great run, having thrown for a combined 12 touchdowns and 862 yards in his last two games. Because the Jets suck, everyone on earth expected them to get carved up today, and then Big Ben went and crapped the bed. But that didn't stop the Jets from trying to… » 11/09/14 4:10pm 11/09/14 4:10pm

This Failed Trick Play From The Jets Gets Sadder Every Time You Watch It

Upon reflection, the most embarrassing thing the New York Jets did yesterday was try to run the world's least effective trick play on a third-quarter kickoff return. I realize that's a bold statement to make, seeing as how this game also included Geno Smith turning in one of the worst quarterbacking performances ever » 10/27/14 9:39am 10/27/14 9:39am

Jets Fan Reacts To Loss Not With Anger, But Complete Emotional Shutdown

This guy's probably reacted to Jets losses with fury and/or screaming in the past, but maybe he's just sick of it, it being everything. Last night, as the Jets' field goal attempt for the win failed, our Jets fan wasn't able to do anything but promptly walk into the bathroom so he could pretend he was in a world in… » 10/17/14 2:13pm 10/17/14 2:13pm

The Jets Invented A Whole New Way To Lose Last Night

One of the new jack football axioms is that you run when you win, not win when you run. It's insulation against the backwards idea that successful offenses are built around a dominant running game, and more of a guideline than a hard truth. Leave it to the Jets to stretch even benign football wisdom to its breaking… » 10/17/14 9:13am 10/17/14 9:13am

Official Jets Hype Video Features Climactic Typo

The New York Jets suck, but that didn't prevent them from putting together a neat little hype video in advance of tonight's game against the New England Patriots. The video was posted on the team's Facebook page, and it features all kinds of slick editing and Inception noises and hot guitar licks. It's like a movie… » 10/16/14 5:36pm 10/16/14 5:36pm

Report: Geno Smith Missed A Meeting Because Of A Dumb Team Policy

The New York Jets got stomped to hell by the San Diego Chargers yesterday, and the 31-0 blowout was so bad that Jets starting quarterback Geno Smith was yanked before the start of the second half. Smith's day got even more embarrassing after the game, a report claimed that he'd missed a team meeting on Saturday night.… » 10/06/14 11:34am 10/06/14 11:34am

Jets CB Dimitri Patterson Has Been Missing Since Friday

Jets cornerback Dimitri Patterson has been missing since Friday's game at MetLife Stadium against the Giants. He was present for meetings, a walk through, and the pre-game meal Friday, but was a no-show come game time. The Jets have not been able to speak with Patterson directly but his agent, Drew Rosenhaus, has… » 8/24/14 4:53pm 8/24/14 4:53pm

Report: Jets Sad That Backup Michael Vick's Cool With Being Backup

Today's Michael Vick is obviously not 2006 Michael Vick, but the Jets picked him up in an attempt to push second-year quarterback Geno Smith to suck less. Then, they told Vick they were going with Smith, barring a disaster. Believe it or not, the 34-year-old Vick accepted that he'd be a backup, and Jets coaches are… » 8/22/14 2:50pm 8/22/14 2:50pm

The Jets Took Fireman Ed Out To Lunch And Tried To Woo Him Back

Jets superfan Fireman Ed retired from the superfan game a few years ago, so now he's just Fireman Ed. Actually, he's retired from firefighting, too, so he's just Ed Anzalone. Anyway, the New York Jets are so desperate for that superfan-led J-E-T-S chant that they tried to wine and dine Ed back into being Fireman Ed. A… » 8/14/14 9:48pm 8/14/14 9:48pm

Jets Beat Writer Says He'll Hitchhike Home If Team Uses All Draft Picks

Heading into the final day of the NFL Draft, Manish Mehta—shit-stirrer extraordinaire for the New York Daily News—had a strong feeling that the Jets would trade at least one of their league-high nine remaining draft picks. On Twitter, he said he would hitchhike home if the Jets did not trade at least one of those… » 5/10/14 2:22pm 5/10/14 2:22pm