What On Earth Is Going On With José Mourinho's Manchester United Pre-Contract?

We can all agree that the big takeaway from the pre-contract José Mourinho has reportedly signed with Manchester United is the simple fact that, after a few months on the sidelines, no doubt stewing over the calamity that was his final season at Chelsea, our man Mourinho will almost certainly be back in his natural…


Right Now, Manchester United Must Rely On Some Unknown Teen To Save Their Season [Update: HE'S FUCKING DOING IT]

In their usually fruitless quest to prove they can still compete with the truly elite clubs in world soccer, Manchester United have apparently decided to challenge Bayern Munich for the title of World’s Most Injured Squad. Just a little while ago, the one bright spot during this season of frustration, Anthony Martial,

The Manchester United Backroom Power Struggle Theory We Desperately Hope Is True

There’s simply never enough intrigue and entertainment to be had from Manchester United to fully sate our appetite. Either they’re crushing all opponents at home and abroad, as they did during Alex Ferguson’s tenure, or they’re shitting all over themselves, the way they have in the few years since Sir Alex left. While…