Deadspin: lonny baxter

Lonny Baxter Does Not Trust The Postal System

Leitch — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 11:10:39 EDT

One would think, after that whole firing weapons outside the White House thing, former Maryland "forward" Lonny Baxter would be careful with the transport of his weapons in the future. One would be wrong.

Mr. Baxter — if you're nasty, like Miss Janet — is now shipping his weaponry via FedEx. You can't do that.

Baxter, 28, of Rockville, used Federal Express to illegally mail three pistols and a Bushmaster rifle in the summer of 2006, according to a criminal information document filed in U.S. District Court in Greenbelt. The package was addressed to a College Park location, but the document does not say who it was addressed to and provides no further information about the shipment.

You know, one would think someone with such a chiseled physique would recognize that the two deadliest weapons in his arsenal were "Left" and "Right." Don't forget you're a warrior, Lonny.

Lonny Baxter: Not Doing Well [DC Sports Bog]

Baxter Receives Amazingly Quick Justice

Leitch — Thu, 24 Aug 2006 12:45:12 EDT

You know, we are no experts in the ever-turning wheels of justice ... but man, this Lonny Baxter thing got settled fast, didn't it?

Baxter was arrested for firing shots outside the White House just eight days ago, and yesterday ... he was sentenced to two months in jail. Man: That was, like, a week. We can't even get our dry cleaning back in a week. (Perhaps we should use Roger Clemens' guy.)

Baxter gave no explanation for the action but did apologize for the "careless, selfish, stupid act that I committed." Meanwhile, Montepaschi Siena, the Italian team Baxter is supposed to play for, says they'll need him back pretty soon after he gets out of jail; their season starts in October. Though as long as he's able to pretend like he has been shot every time he's fouled, he should be in game shape for Italy, no problem.

Baxter Sentenced To Two Months [Yahoo News]
One Must Be Careful Of Those Midnight Inconvenient Truth Screenings [Deadspin]

One Must Be Careful Of Those Midnight "Inconvenient Truth" Screenings

Leitch — Wed, 16 Aug 2006 12:15:10 EDT

You know, if you had told us an NBA player was going to take a couple shots at the White House, we would have thought it would have been Etan Thomas. (We kid Etan Thomas; his political beliefs are sincere, just like his poetry about Abe Pollin's prostate.)

Anyway, former Charlotte Bobcats forward Lonny Baxter was arrested early this morning for firing a number of shots in the general vicinity of the White House. Police say after pulling him over, theysaw "in plain view a number of spent shell cartridges."

Baxter, generously listed as "260 pounds," recently signed with Italian team Montepaschi Siena, which doesn't quite make this an international incident, considering he didn't sign with the Raptors.

Baxter Arrested For Firing Shots Near White House [Reuters]

(Our friends at Wonkette are all over this too.)

(By the way, that photo of Baxter and the President comes from High And Inside. Outstanding find, guys.)