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david hirshey is the closer
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.
Wide right. Are there two more magical words in the English language aside from perhaps open bar? But for a New York Giants fan and Chelsea-hater, wide right is a thing of poetic beauty. First Scott Norwood misses from 47 yards against the Big Blue in the '91 Super Bowl and now John Terry misses from 12 yards against ManU in yesterday's Champions League final.
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david hirshey is the closer
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.
I told you so. That's right, way back on August 6, 2007, five days before the start of this interminable but historic season, I correctly predicted the order of finish at the top of the league: ManU, Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool. If only the Lords of the EPL had listened to me then and awarded the title to United, think of all the pain and misery we could have saved ourselves, to say nothing of my liver.
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david hirshey is the closer
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.
Go ahead, bow down. Heel before Manchester United like you would a certain overdressed German guy with a pointy hat who's playing to a sold out Yankee Stadium this week. They deserve it. They stand on the cusp of pulling off an astonishing double championship, and they have done it with style and panache. So why am I not ready to genuflect?
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david hirshey is the closer
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.
When I walked into Kinsale Tavern on Sunday morning, making sure to step lightly around the dried tears of Patriots fans right outside the entrance, I was expecting a raucous welcome. After all, I was rockin' my Giants Super Bowl Champions t-shirt and still recovering from reprising Fear and Loathing in Phoenix with Leitch who, among other things, offered to blow a state trooper — and give him a signed book! — if he didn't search our car.
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David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.
If I weren't so filled with the milk — ok, beer — of human kindness, I would loathe Cristiano Ronaldo almost as much as I hate Tom Brady. Here's a guy who after sustaining a small gash on his left eyebrow — oh, the poor baby! — in a Champions League game last year said, "I don't like to look like this, but in four or five days I will be beautiful once again." Here's a guy who in the first sentence of his new book proclaims, "My name is Cristiano Ronaldo ... and I know this name means a lot to those who love football." Yeah, it also means a lot to those who love hair-gel, half-naked Vogue layouts, winking at refs and diving more than Jacques Cousteau.
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david hirshey is the closer
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. This column would have run Monday, but no one was reading the site on Monday.
I used to think that I'd witnessed some wild-ass shit at my company's holiday parties back in the day. I mean, I once had an assistant who thought he had gotten the ultimate Christmas grab bag, having double-dipped with two different young ladies, only to be punched out on the dance floor by one of the girls. But now I realize that what I thought was outrageous behavior was actually kind of innocent holiday hijinks.
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getting weekend soccer quotas outta the way
In case you haven't seen this kid yet, this is a nine-year-old who just signed a contract with Manchester United. It's the Reggie Bush kid, but, you know, not using his hands. And now Man U has signed him. Freddy Adu's a geezer fogey, really.
david hirshey is the closer
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Because we're in the mood to be kind of cheap today. Sometimes, circumstances collide to provide, in the midst of chaos, a rare moment of truth.
(Via Knees Up Mother Brown)
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