Mario Balotelli Does Selfish, Swaggy Thing, Wins Game For Liverpool

Liverpool were hosting Turkish side Beşiktaş in the European Soccer NIT today, and it was scoreless until Liverpool young cock Jordon Ibe was tripped up in the box in the 85th minute. Penalty! Captain-for-the-day Jordan Henderson picked up the ball and walked to the spot, which is when hero and burgeoning… » 2/19/15 6:05pm 2/19/15 6:05pm

Mario Balotelli Caught Sliding Into Some Teenage Girls' Instagram DMs

Most of the time, Mario Balotelli is really good at Instagram. Sometimes, though, he messes up. First, it was posting a dumb internet meme (that, to be fair, elicited an even dumber response by the braindead English FA). Now, we find him hitting on a couple 19-year-old Icelandic girls in their DMs. » 1/08/15 6:48pm 1/08/15 6:48pm

Mario Balotelli's Supposed New House Is Cool And Good

This may not be news to you, but Italian soccer star Mario Balotelli, who is the funnest, is back in England after being bought by Premier League side Liverpool from AC Milan. Since he'll ostensibly be sticking around for a little while, at least, he needs somewhere to live. This is the house he's rumored to have… » 9/04/14 11:16am 9/04/14 11:16am

British Skip Bayless Has A Strong Take On Mario Balotelli

We'll have more on this as an actual soccer move when (if?) it becomes official, but it's looking pretty near certain that AC Milan striker/international style icon Mario Balotelli will be returning to the Premier League, slotting in at Liverpool to replace Luis Suárez. Chris Bascombe over at the Telegraph has fucking » 8/21/14 11:46am 8/21/14 11:46am

Mario Balotelli Jumps Over A Guy, Knees Him In The Head In The Process

Italy are playing Uruguay today in World Cup Group D's final matchday. The winner of of this game joins Costa Rica (!(?)) in the knockout stages, so as you'd imagine, it's a bit chippy. In the 23rd minute, Balotelli retreated into his own half to win a header, elevated, and jumped right over a Uruguayan player. He … » 6/24/14 12:47pm 6/24/14 12:47pm

Mario Balotelli Has A Better Idea For Italy's Lineup

The collecting craze at this World Cup is not trading cards, but stickers. Panini's World Cup album is once again a hot seller, with collectors buying sticker packs in the hopes of completing an entire national side—or even the whole album. Mario Balotelli is his own sort of completist. » 6/17/14 11:40am 6/17/14 11:40am