Lots of smart people have made the case for Mauer, and to them I'll add that, as late as Aug. 18, Mauer's batting average was higher than Teixeira's on-base percentage (and today it's still above Morales' OBP). If VORP is your thing, the distance between Mauer and Jeter is roughly the same as the distance between Jeter and Marco Scutaro, and Mauer missed all of April. He is so self-evidently the MVP, even by the discredited standards of the old school, that the fact there is even a question makes you wonder if the awards discussion is not so much a proxy war between the statheads and the deadline poets as it is an argument between people who are paying attention and those who are trying to make a tee time.

The latest entry in the genre is Allen Barra's brief on behalf of Jeter, whose resurgence is at least partly due to his playing in a stadium with the rough dimensions of a rice cooker. You can probably recite the argument by heart:

The case for Mr. Jeter as American League MVP is being made by more subjective arguments. "How do you measure the value of inspiration and professionalism?" asks Marty Appel, author of "Munson: The Life and Death of a Yankee Captain." "Some people will ­argue that intangibles don't ­exist, but in the ninth inning of close games everybody believes in them."

Thurman Munson's and Mr. Jeter's personalities were different; Munson was surly and pugnacious, while Mr. Jeter still projects the image of boyish enthusiasm he had as a rookie in 1995. But, says Mr. Appel, the two share one ­important characteristic: "They both lead by example and performance. They helped make their teams better just by being there. No one ever slacked off with either of those guys on the field." To which Mike ­Ozanian of Forbes.com adds: "Jeter has been the ­anchor on a team that could have been ­derailed by injuries to key players like Alex ­Rodriguez. Winning has to count for something."

The campaign for Teixeira was inevitable. He has driven in a fat load of runs for the team with the best record in baseball, and even reasonable people think that should count for something. (It shouldn't, but whatever.) And someone was bound to bring up Morales, undeserving or not, if only because he's put up the most surprising numbers on a team that has put up a lot of them. Jeter is another matter entirely. Barra admits as much, writing, "No one would argue that Mr. Jeter's statistics are better than those of Minnesota catcher Joe Mauer." An MVP for Jeter wouldn't be an award for performance; it'd be an honorarium for Jeter's lengthy service to the sportswriting profession as a catch-basin for all its loose ideals about hustle and leadership and sportsmanship. (It'd be cousin to the vote that put Jim Rice in the Hall of Fame not because he deserved it but because he could be turned into a living PSA about steroids.)

Baseball is full of unworthy MVPs — Jimmy Rollins and Justin Morneau come readily to mind. But at least for them, people had the better sense to make specious arguments on faulty statistical grounds rather than specious arguments on matters of character. Jeter's MVP would be a case of the mythmakers congratulating themselves on the quality of their myth, of sportswriters swallowing their own line of arrant bullshit.

The Case for Derek Jeter, MVP [Wall Street Journal]
RandBall: Jeter as AL MVP over Mauer? [Star Tribune]

After a raucous capacity crowd booed the living daylights out of their wayward native son during Monday's opener, Orioles fans decided to pace themselves in Wednesday's second game by not showing up. I don't mean to be a pessimist, but the Yard was half full Wednesday, at 22,856, for their Game 2, 7-5 spanking of the Yanks. Of course, it was fun for Baltimore fans to sit at home and watch this graphic. If only the stock exchange would rise like that.

Game 3 gets underway in a few minutes, and I would suggest the Yankees try to win this one if they don't want to return home next week to find their new stadium burned to the ground.

Meanwhile, Teixeira attempted to clear up the controversy over whether he was a Yankee fan or an Orioles fan while growing up (which seems to be a main point of contention in Baltimore).

"I rooted for Don Mattingly, though, whenever he came here,"Teixeira said. "He was my favorite player growing up. When the Yankees came to town, that's who I rooted for. I loved him. He was my guy. I wore No. 23 every chance I got. So the only time I was allowed to wear Yankees stuff was when Mattingly was coming to town and playing the O's."

So every other day, you were in Orioles' gear?

"Oh yeah. My favorite team was always the Orioles. I've always said that," he said. "But when the Yankees were in town, I'd wear a Mattingly T-shirt and a Yankees hat and root for him."

Hope that clears it up.

Clarifying Teixeira's Childhood Loyalties [Baltimore Sun]
Game Two: Baltimorons, Mascot Taunting & A Late Rally [Fack Youk]

As Dash mentioned earlier, there's already panic in the Bronx after Baltimore's 10-5 spanking of New York on Monday. But things couldn't be lovelier in Crab City, which enjoyed the following cosmic justice, albeit only for a day.

• Johnny Damon appeared to have a shot at catching Cesar Izturis' fly ball in the eighth, until an Orioles fan bumped his glove in a battle for the ball at the top of the left field wall. It ended up as a two-run homer that gave the Orioles an 8-5 lead. Call it "Avenging Jeffrey Maier.'' Although the fan in Baltimore didn't appear to reach over the fence, as the 12-year-old Maier clearly did in the 1996 postseason to turn Derek Jeter's fly ball to rightfield into a key homer, the same two teams were involved. And this time it went Baltimore's way. "I thought I had it," Damon said, "and then the fan's glove looked like it got in my way.". Note: The fan IS reaching over the fence, isn't he?

• Joe Biden had better control than CC Sabathia.

• Maryland native Mark Teixeira, who signed with the Yankees in the off season, was 0-for-4 with a walk and left five men on base. He was booed with a vitriol usually reserved for Barry Bonds or Bernie Madoff, and afterward seemed to be curiously in denial about it: "I expect to get booed in every visiting stadium," Teixeira said. "We're the Yankees." OK then.

But most of all, the 48,607 fans who packed Camden for once didn't remind us of the Yankees, Maryland Chapter. The great majority were in orange and black, causing Sun columnist David Steele to note that they had finally "taken back Camden Yards." That may have been mostly to boo Teixeira, which means its temporary. But one hopes not.

Meanwhile, on the Orioles blogs:

I've thought for a while that Girardi's Yanks are soft and play with a smug sense of entitlement. Not the confidence of a champion but the pretentiousness of a spoiled child.

And a commenter chimes in:

About Teixeira
I saw a post game interview with him on MLB Network where he said the boos didn't get to him because it reminded him of when he was a kid and he'd come to the Orioles games and boo the other teams himself! Did you do that when WEARING YOUR YANKEE CAP TO THE GAME AND HAVING ALL THE O'S FANS GIVE YOU A HARD TIME the way you said they did when you became a Yankee? What a douche.
— by Stacey on Apr 7, 2009 4:36 AM EDT

Oh, and Tim Lincecum is scheduled to battle Jeff Suppan here at AT&T at 1:05 PST, but as I peer out the window it's raining. Curse the gods!

Yanks Can Ease Recession Blues [Fox Sports]
Irked Orioles Fans Send Angry Message To Native Mark Teixeira [New York Daily News]
Bird Droppings: Opening Day Hangover Edition [Camden Chat]
Fan Battles Damon For Drive, Helps Turn It Into HR [Newsday]
Orioles Fans Reclaim Camden Yards [Baltimore Sun]

In fact, the Teixeira hate has already begun. From the Baltimore Sun:

At 1:40 p.m., Mark Teixeira emerged from the Yankees dugout to do an onfield interview for the YES network. There weren't many fans here, but those gathered around the Yankees dugout made themselves known. "You're a sell-out, Mark!" one screamed. "We hate you!" said another.

That should only be the beginning for Teixeira, who chose to sign with the Yankees over his "hometown" Orioles over the offseason. So peeved are O's fans at Teixeira that there has even been a song written for the occasion. The Boooog Powells have written "Boo Teixeira," a ditty which includes the stirring line:

Now Yankee fans think that they can take us,
But guess what chumps, we've got Nick Markakis ...

Video below.

At least all of this Teixeira hate takes the heat off of Joe Biden.

A fun Teixeira quote to leave you with:

"In a perfect world, the Orioles would've won the World Series every year I was alive, and I'd be an Oriole right now," Teixeira said. "I have so much love for this city, for this organization. But in the business world, in the baseball world, sometimes you have to make difficult decisions. When it came down to it, the Yankees were a better fit for me."

I won't comment on that: I'll leave it up to you.

Mark Teixeira Has No Regrets About Choosing New York Yankees Over Hometown Baltimore Orioles [The Star Ledger]
Teixeira: In A Perfect World, I'd Be An Oriole [Baltimore Sun]

The Teixeiras were introduced by the Yankees at a press conference this morning, where Mark revealed how their deal — at one time thought completely dead — came to pass.

"The whole process was confusing. Sometimes I'd tell Scott [Boras] to stop calling me, then I'd call him five times a day saying, 'Tell me what you know!' Two weeks before Christmas, I talked to Leigh about it again, and we kind of decided that, hey, the Yankees are where we want to be. Cash [Brian Cashman] might want to give Leigh a hug, because when I asked her during the process, 'Where should I go, where should I go?,' she'd always say, 'I just want you to be happy.' Finally she said, 'I want you to be a Yankee,' and it was a done deal. Once we got the contract figured out, it was a no-brainer for me."

Somehow I have a hard time picturing Barry Bonds or Roger Clemens deciding where to sign based on what their wives say. But this is obviously one of those marriages, where choosing the living room drapes is a joint decision and Mark will share equally in the car pool duties.

Here she is, second from the left with Heidi DeRosa, Stacie Barajas and Angela Showalter. And more Leigh in the video below (not exactly camera shy, is she). Get used to seeing her around, Yankee faithful.

Yankees Can Thank Leigh Teixeira For Their New First Baseman [Big League Stew]
Leigh Teixeira [Digg Mirror]
If The Yankees Are Buying A Championship, At Least It's A Good Looking One [The 'Ropolitans]

The Red Sox? I thought that John Henry said that was off? He lied to us!

While the source declined to discuss specifics, there are strong indications that the Red Sox will announce that they have landed the highly-coveted slugger, who has been courted this off-season by several major league clubs, including the Angels, Orioles and Nationals.

The Red Sox have been considered one of the lead contenders in the Teixeira sweepstakes, but it was unclear whether the team would be able to meet the asking price from agent Scott Boras, who had hoped to land a contract for as much as $200 million over ten years. Last week, Red Sox owner John Henry told reporters that the team was no longer pursuing the player, but the statement was widely seen as a negotiating maneuver.

Word has it that the Nationals were going hard to the hoop; an eight-year deal worth between $178 and $184 million. And since Tex is a Maryland native, the Orioles were hopeful (they were even going to throw in the Orioles door knocker).

By the time this is over, it'll be time for Brett Favre to start deciding if he's going to retire.

Teixeira Announcement Today [Washington Times]

According to Ken Rosenthal of Fox Sports, the row of dominoes looks something like this: The Angels want closer Brian Fuentes, but only only if they lose Teixeira. The Cardinals also want Fuentes, so must wait on the Angels. If the Cardinals don't get Fuentes, they could go for pitchers Kenshin Kawakami or Will Ohman. If Boston the Angels don't get Teixeira, they're interested in Manny Ramirez, Milton Bradley and possibly others. The Yankees could be after the same group if they lose Teixeira. Meanwhile the Cubs and Rays want Bradley, but can not get him until he exhausts his options with the Angels and Yankees.

Once Teixeira signs with someone, the free agency dam will break with such ferocity that both Buster Olney and Peter Gammons will be swept out to sea, never to be heard from again. There will also be much property damage. But where is Tex most likely to go? From The Sporting News:

If Teixeira wants to be part of something special, he should sign with the Red Sox. Never mind a couple of extra years. He can name his price. Eight years at $165 million? Done, Mark. What jersey number would you like? See you in Fort Myers.

Where Teixeira Could And Should Play In 2009 [The Sporting News]
Once Teixeira Signs, Others Likely To Get Deals Fast [Fox Sports]

Both of today's stories are nice guy athlete stories, because it's a Monday and we can't get worked up to be too negative on Mondays. First up: A jovial tale of mirth with Rangers first baseman Mark Teixeira, coming to us from Dallas' Reid Wakefield.

I was at a Jackopierce concert with my wife and spotted Mark Teixeira (there with a date - and, yes, he bobbed his head and sang along all night). During the show, Tex got up and headed towards the lobby, so I followed him out. My brother and I are huge Rangers fans and actually had a bet last season about whether or not Teixeira would hit 40 homers (I thought he would). I cornered Tex and explained to him that my brother had no faith (the final tally was 43 jacks); he agreed to rub it in by calling my brother on my cell. I was expecting some friendly banter, but instead the conversation consisted of one line: "Hey Trey, this is Mark Teixeira...shove it up your ass!" Sweet.

For the record, we do not recommend following athletes when they leave a concert. That said, we don't recommend going to Jackpierce concerts either.

Athlete Run-Ins: Matt Leinart's Surprise [Deadspin]

(By the way, even though the Win A Book! part of this contest is over, we still encourage you to send us your athlete run-in stories at tips@deadspin.com. If it's good, we'll run it on the site and, hell, we'll probably find something cool for you lying around here.)