massholes Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

In a sport of polite claps, the boos were never going to be loud enough to disrupt LIV golfers
Phil Mickelson slid out of the U.S. Open on the oil slick he oozed in on not a penny richer from his appearance in Brookline, Mass. He missed the cut after a 3-over round Friday that put him at +11 after 36 holes, and if you don’t make it to the final two days of the tournament, you don’t get a cent...

Now, For Your Enjoyment, We Have Angry Bruins Fans Whaling On Each Other
Lots of tension in the arena tonight for Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Final. Lots of wound-up hockey fans. Perhaps this sort of thing was inevitable, although you’d expect it to at least be between opposing fans. Not so! Here we have two young Boston bros talking shit and hurling beer into the face of ...
![These Massholes Found The Missing Red Sox Division Banner, And They're Willing To Negotiate [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/iambxpocn4wuhwqt9xez.jpg)
These Massholes Found The Missing Red Sox Division Banner, And They're Willing To Negotiate [Update]
Practically every stereotype of a New England sports fan is on display in this astounding Boston Globe video accompanying the story of Louie Iacuzzi of Malden—of course—who with his buddy found the Red Sox’s 2018 division title banner on the highway and now want a reward for its return....

Massachusetts Man Cannot Handle Seeing A Sunfish: "What The Fuck Is That, Kid?"
At first, it’s reasonable to think that this video’s protagonist, a man from Malden, is laying the Massachusetts accent on a little thick as he reacts to seeing a sunfish in the water. Oh man, Jay, it’s dead, bro, or somethin’! Michael Bergin’s interview with the Boston Globe basically confirms that...

Five Boozy Hot-Drink Recipes To Enjoy During This Neverending Winter
It's snowing again. That's true of the place where I live, and probably of the place where you live, because apparently, Mother Nature and Father Time have colluded to ensure that this winter will never end, ever. As if all this snow weren't enough, we'll spend the next seven or so years hearing...

Mayor Of Boston Credits "KJ" And "Hondo" For Team's Heart, Success
Mayor Thomas Menino has presided over Boston, city of champions, since 1993. He knows his sports. For instance, he once talked about the time "Varitek split the uprights." Now he's talking about "KJ" and "Hondo," the two Celtics with a lot of heart. He probably means to discuss Kevin "KG" Garnett ...

Yes, ESPN Is Really Producing A Sitcom About Four Longtime Guy Friends Who Live Outside Of Boston And Watch Sports
My God, my God, thou hast forsaken me. [Deadline, h/t Patrick]...

Massachusetts-Area Idiots Fly Jolly Roger Atop Tiny Fishing Vessel, Try And Fail To Rob Sailboat While Owner Sleeps
Piracy is real, y'all. East Africa? Hornet's nest. Caribbean? Same deal. But the North Shore of Boston might be the worst of the bunch. Here are the obnoxious news ledes mocking this terribly serious crime:...

If Albert DeSalvo Wasn't The Boston Strangler, Who Was? Bill James Investigates
During the years 1962-64, 13 women in the Boston area were molested and then strangled by an assailant who came to be known as the Boston Strangler. In 1965, Albert DeSalvo, a convicted sex offender and patient at a local mental institute, began telling people he committed the murders. With the help...

Boston Fans Perfect The Art Of Self Parody
This custom Beruit table perfectly crystallizes the essence of why the stereotypical Boston sports fan is so universally loathed. Naturally, the stereotypical Boston sports fan who created it could not be prouder. [BarstoolSports]...

Jeter On The Lam After Bank Robbery, Support Of PatriotsBlue Jays
Chad Floyd Jeter is wanted by police after allegedly robbing a bank in Alabama, while wearing a New England PatriotsBlue Jays cap misidentified by Alabama police as a Patriots hat. (Who did you think I was talking about?) He is considered armed and dangerously clutch. [Wicked Good Sports]...