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New York, 10:07 AM
Tue Dec 15
12 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of ArkansasFred ArkansasFred
    10:03 AM

    In reply to Tiger's Latest Mistress: A Doping Scandal
    Is "platelet-rich plasma therapy" some New Age-y medical scam like
    "craniosacral therapy" or "diet and exercise"?
     Reply
    ArkansasFred was starred ArkansasFred was unstarred
    Image of Phintastic Phintastic
    10:03 AM

    In reply to Tiger's Latest Mistress: A Doping Scandal
    Other texts to the Doc include this gem...

    When's the last time you got laid? Get over here. I will wear you out.
     Reply
    Phintastic was starred Phintastic was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    10:00 AM

    In reply to Tiger's Latest Mistress: A Doping Scandal
    The guy on the left is supposedly 50 years old, btw.

    Ryan Seacrest just injected a quart of purified calf's blood into both his eye sockets.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of Civil Negligence Civil Negligence
    09:59 AM

    In reply to Tiger's Latest Mistress: A Doping Scandal
    Maybe the Canucks here can clear this one up for me, but does it go:

    FBI : The Royal Canadian Mounted Police :: CIA : Her Majesty's Bird-Watching Troupe?
     Reply
    Civil Negligence was starred Civil Negligence was unstarred
    Image of sir_pantsalot sir_pantsalot
    09:56 AM

    In reply to Tiger's Latest Mistress: A Doping Scandal
    "He does admit to getting beef injections from his partner Hugh for the last ten years, which is just bizarre, but we'll move on."

    -fixed
     Reply
    sir_pantsalot was starred sir_pantsalot was unstarred
    Image of Chamomiles Davis Chamomiles Davis
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    Hank Gola makes Hank Gola look like Hank Gola.

    I WIN!
     Reply
    Chamomiles Davis was starred Chamomiles Davis was unstarred
    Image of Steve U Steve U
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    Craggs to Gola - J'Accuse! (of being a terrible columnist)
     Reply
    Steve U was starred Steve U was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    ...the vacuum is being filled by more tawdry stories every day.

    Must be one of those Dyson Ball vacuums.
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of ClintonPortishead ClintonPortishead
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    I think I've figured out the Sportswriters' Formula.

    1. Make a crazy point.
    2. Flesh out that crazy point with multiple qualifiers & counter-examples which cast doubt on to the crazy point just made.
    3. Return to crazy point undeterred, as though you actually just strengthened your argument.
    4. Patronize.
    5. Utilize fantastically ridiculous simile/metaphor to drive home the crazy point you just inadvertently destroyed through your own circular reasoning.

    And I swear to god if anyone here replies with a "6. Profit!!," I'm going to figure out how to castrate you via an IP address.
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead was starred ClintonPortishead was unstarred
    Image of Clarence Rosario Clarence Rosario
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead: I'm going to figure out how to castrate you via an IP address

    Too late: GooglesnIP is already in beta. Want an invite?
     Reply
    Clarence Rosario was starred Clarence Rosario was unstarred
    Image of Hustler of Culture Hustler of Culture
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead: Wouldn't it be

    6...
    7. Profit

    //ducks
     Reply
    Hustler of Culture was starred Hustler of Culture was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead:

    Six: Jenna von Oÿ?
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of Richard Petty Bourgeoisie Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead:
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead promoted this comment Edited by Richard Petty Bourgeoisie at 12/11/09 2:19 PM Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was starred Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was unstarred
    Image of ClintonPortishead ClintonPortishead
    12/11/09

    @Weed Against Speed: And there's my first "have to google that" of the DS day. MarkKelso'sMigraine weeps in silence.
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead was starred ClintonPortishead was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead: @Clarence Rosario: There's also the exciting new "Chemical Castration, By Bing."
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of ClintonPortishead ClintonPortishead
    12/11/09

    @Richard Petty Bourgeoisie: Aww, I got the joke, no need to delete.
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead was starred ClintonPortishead was unstarred
    Image of Richard Petty Bourgeoisie Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
    12/11/09

    @ClintonPortishead: I was actually concerned about the lack of funny. My fastball isn't even tickling the mid 80s today.
     Reply
    Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was starred Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was unstarred
    Image of dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    We're beyond reasonable behavior with Woods. He's coming across like a horny teenager.

    Eleven times a day? Unreasonable?
     Reply
    dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac was starred dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    He executed his own column and hung it upside down like Mussolini.

    He double penetrated that shit like he was the Kennedy brothers.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of ClintonPortishead ClintonPortishead
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    that one wonders how he can write and clutch his pearls at the same time.

    I've often thought the same thing about BDD.
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead was starred ClintonPortishead was unstarred
    Image of Steve U Steve U
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    write something about Tiger Woods so egregiously stupid that it'd make Mark Whicker look like Grantland Rice. Take it away, Hank Gola.

    Just to clarify: He's saying that the New York Daily News makes the Orange County Register look like the turn-of-the century New York Times.
     Reply
    Steve U was starred Steve U was unstarred
    Image of ClueHeywood ClueHeywood
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    Suspend him for adultery? If other leagues suspended players for philandering, we'd end up with Kurt Warner playing one-on-one with Jon Kitna.
     Reply
    ClueHeywood was starred ClueHeywood was unstarred
    Image of DirkToberFest DirkToberFest
    12/11/09

    In reply to Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
    When it does, Finchem has to call Woods into the principal's office, give him his fair hearing and, if his actions are as shameful as purported, suspend him.

    Little known fact: Hank Gola's mother lost both of her hands during Hank's childhood.
     Reply
    DirkToberFest was starred DirkToberFest was unstarred
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