A Combat Doctor's Field Guide To Masturbating In Afghanistan

Nine real-life scenarios from the front lines, nine field-tested solutions, courtesy our friend "Dr. Watts," a military doctor who served with the Marines Corps infantry. » 5/26/14 4:00pm 5/26/14 4:00pm

"I Heard Myself Say Out Loud, 'Someone Needs To Smoke That Little Girl'"

Here Is Your Memorial Day Menu

So it's Memorial Day, a day designated by the federal government for inching glacially northward on I-95 with ten trillion other weekend beachgoers, cursing the day this humid blue turd congealed out of space-garbage in the orbit of a giant ignited fart, secretly desperate to return to the climate-controlled privacy… » 5/26/14 12:00pm 5/26/14 12:00pm

Slash Played The National Anthem Before Blackhawks-Kings Game 3

What better way to honor our fallen troops this Memorial Day weekend than to have Slash shred a rendition of The Star-Spangled-Banner? » 5/24/14 8:30pm 5/24/14 8:30pm

A Wisconsin Festival Claims A Record Bratwurst Because Of Course

The Midwesternest piece of Memorial Day Weekend news has broken, and it is that the self-proclaimed World's Largest Brat Fest has achieved its destiny by grilling and bunning perhaps the world's largest brat. » 5/25/13 8:52pm 5/25/13 8:52pm

How To Grill Cheeseburgers And Win Your Memorial Day Cookout

So you've got your grand Memorial Day weekend feast all planned, your spread of exotic, expensive victuals purchased and prepped and ready to be grilled and smoked and barbecued and so on. Brined chicken breasts and home-ground-spice-rubbed pork ribs and organic farm-raised fair-trade cockles; a rainbow cornucopia… » 5/25/13 11:34am 5/25/13 11:34am

Metta World Peace Wishes You All A Happy Labor Day

In a way, it is sort of fitting that World Peace can't remember Memorial Day, but we're guessing this has less to do with Metta being meta and more to do with Metta being Metta. Enjoy it. » 5/28/12 2:18pm 5/28/12 2:18pm

In Honor Of Memorial Day Weekend, Here's A Children's Treasury Of…

Memorial Day is great: it's the unofficial beginning of summer, Jurassic Park 2 comes out if it's 1997, Saving Private Ryan is on somewhere, swimming in public bodies of water becomes socially acceptable again, and barbecue. All the wonderful barbecue. » 5/31/10 5:15pm 5/31/10 5:15pm

Remembering, On Memorial Day

It's Memorial Day, and, like most of you, we're off until tomorrow. As our one post today, as tradition, we remember Pat Tillman, along with all veterans, and honor all those still serving. If you need something to read today and reflect, here's Gary Smith's outstanding Tillman story from a couple of years ago. Be… » 5/26/08 3:48am 5/26/08 3:48am