Florida Put The Players In A Dump Truck For Its Homecoming Parade

Florida hosts Vanderbilt today at noon for homecoming and 24 hours before kickoff, the Gators paraded through campus for the 90th year in a row. 90 years is a lot, and worth celebrating itself, so they got a corvette and put the players in a dump truck. » 11/09/13 9:30am 11/09/13 9:30am

"Team Obama Loses Early Wicket": The Romney-Obama Debate Was Like Every…

The debate Wednesday could be compared to many things—a slow dance in which the partners are holding potato peelers to each other's throats, perhaps, or a restaurant in which you, the diner, get to watch a prep cook slow-spit on your burger before it's served—but of course everyone immediately turned to sports… » 10/04/12 3:30pm 10/04/12 3:30pm

Yup, A Giant Truck Full Of Fish Crashed Into A Building Named After…

Good writers spend ages searching for the perfect metaphor, the one that makes everything make sense. Agnostics spend their years searching for some sign that a higher power guides the universe. Look no further, heretics (and Marlins beat writers). Everything was revealed today, in the midday sun at Yale University in… » 10/01/12 5:55pm 10/01/12 5:55pm

Is A Monster Stalking The River Outside London's Olympic Stadium? An…

LONDON—The River Lea winds its way southeast from the industrial town of Luton to London's East End, where it drains into Thames a couple miles upstream of the ingenious tidal barrier that keeps the capital dry. A tame body of water by any account, the Lea disperses toward the end of its course into placid fingers… » 8/11/12 2:20pm 8/11/12 2:20pm

Kevin Garnett Made One Hell Of A Cooking Metaphor Today

This year's NBA training camp is shorter than usual, and this upsets a lot of players who'd like more time to gel with their teammates. It has especially upset Boston's Kevin Garnett, who blessed us with this train wreck of a cooking metaphor during the Celtics' practice today: » 12/13/11 6:30pm 12/13/11 6:30pm

Your Religion/Textile/Baserunning Metaphor Of The Day

Anyone want to explain this one? "What appeared to be 90 feet, teased from the fabric of New York Yankees resolve, with each tug brought more yards of grace." » 10/20/10 10:00am 10/20/10 10:00am

President Of Bolivia Knees Political Rival In The Groin During Soccer…

Bolivia held a friendly match to commemorate the re-opening of the newly refurbished La Paz stadium on Sunday. » 10/05/10 11:15am 10/05/10 11:15am

ESPN Radio Intern Inadvertently Scratches Junk On Camera

It's been a while since we heard about a sports radio intern doing something untoward but look at what we have here. Intern Alex of Primetime with Isaac and Big Suke, we offer you our praise and condolences. [Bob's Blitz] » 8/06/10 4:30pm 8/06/10 4:30pm

Metaphor Becomes Reality At Titans' Stadium

LP Field just cannot catch a break. After workers finally cleared out all the troublesome floodwater, a 5- to 6-feet-deep sinkhole was found at the stadium. It has something to do with "substandard materials" that are not Vince Young. » 6/29/10 4:30pm 6/29/10 4:30pm

A Children's Treasury Of Rick Reilly®'s Heat-Related Similes

Rick Reilly®, who yesterday brought word that Colt McCoy's girlfriend is "hotter than shrimp vindaloo," has long shown a fondness for thermodynamic analogy. We've collected a few examples, with helpful visual accompaniment. » 10/15/09 3:00pm 10/15/09 3:00pm

Your Food/Finance/Heavy Construction Metaphor Of The Day

"[W]hen a team gets on a postseason roll, it usually produces a steamroller effect. Sometimes the roll goes stale, but if you get a fast bite after it leaves the oven, it still tastes good and pays dividends." [NYDailyNews.com] » 10/15/09 10:15am 10/15/09 10:15am

Metaphor As Illness: Whitlock, Train Rides And The Pursuit Of "Strange…

Since the deaths of Steve McNair and Arturo Gatti, the world has turned its misty eyes to the prose of Jason Whitlock, who has made sense of it all by analogizing crazily and discoursing on "strange tang" and "young tail." » 7/16/09 6:45pm 7/16/09 6:45pm

Diagramming Sarah Palin's "Full-Court Press" Metaphor

Last Friday, Sarah Palin shrugged into her respectable Republican cloth coat and announced she was resigning from office. Along the way, she dropped a somewhat baffling basketball analogy, which we've helpfully diagrammed for you below, just as Palin described it. » 7/06/09 2:00pm 7/06/09 2:00pm

Of Superbikes And Food Metaphors: FJM's Greatest Hits

A sports blog's success is usually measured by page views or unique visitors — these odd, mysterious numbers that merely serve as advertiser bait, but are woefully inaccurate in revealing overall quality. The true measure of a successful sports blog, like most other creative endeavors done for the right reasons, is… » 11/17/08 1:45pm 11/17/08 1:45pm