Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Roy Hobbs Meets Sisyphus

Things got better on Friday for Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran starter and living parable. Yet things also got no better. Pitted against 28-year-old Angels ace Jered Weaver, the 38-year-old Colon found that his arm was fresh, his control everything he wanted it to be. "I feel like I did at the beginning of the… » 9/12/11 5:11pm 9/12/11 5:11pm

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Plagued By Indecision

Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran pitcher and embodiment of struggle against the all-consuming void, pitched again on Saturday. Or did he? He came in on a three-game losing streak; the Yankees won; he is still on a three-game losing streak. His line: 6.1 IP, 7 H, 4 R, 7 K, 1 BB, 2 HR. » 9/06/11 4:38pm 9/06/11 4:38pm

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Conquered By Optimism

How can hope be the enemy of human endeavor? That was the question facing Bartolo Colon Sunday afternoon, as the Yankees pitcher-philosopher took the mound against Zach Britton of the Baltimore Orioles—veteran against rookie, righty against lefty, metaphor for inexorable despair against metaphor for the power of… » 8/29/11 1:26pm 8/29/11 1:26pm

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: It's A Fine Line Between Failure And Non-Failure

What did Bartolo Colon teach us about our place in the universe last night? Special philosophical correspondent David Roher was at the ballpark to witness the veteran Yankee's performance against Oakland, as Colon fell behind the A's 5-0—with two of the runs scoring after he'd left the game, on a double served up by… » 8/24/11 4:56pm 8/24/11 4:56pm

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Boone Logan Ex Machina

New York Yankees starting pitcher Bartolo Colon threw himself-and all humanity-on the mercy of the universe Friday night, by daring to pitch against the Boston Red Sox. And the universe delivered a mixed verdict: 4.2 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 K, hooked for Boone Logan with the bases loaded in the fifth. The Yankees rallied to… » 8/08/11 4:03pm 8/08/11 4:03pm

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Wonders Are Still Unceasing

Yesterday, the New York Yankees' veteran salvage-heap starter — and barometer of existential significance — took the mound against the Oakland Athletics. How did he (and by extension, all humankind) fare? 7.0 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 4 K. Joy reigns once more, till the next time. » 7/25/11 1:15pm 7/25/11 1:15pm

What Does Bartolo Colon Mean Today?

Life is a small sample. So what are the metaphysical implications of the most recent game pitched by the Yankees' 38-year-old fourth starter? After July 14 (0.2 IP, 8 H, 6 R, 0 K), "Defeat had simply taken wonder's place." Last night? 6.1 IP, 5 H, 3 R, 9 K. Wonder is back! » 7/20/11 2:55pm 7/20/11 2:55pm