•It's been a while since we've seen Bruce Pearl use a bit of the ol' magic on the fairer sex, but he more than makes up for it in this undated very old photo of him with his new divan.

•Sorry, golf fans. No refunds on tickets if Tiger doesn't show up for the event. As if Prayad Marksaeng wasn't enough of a draw for your $200.

•Mike Holmgren is reportedly in talks to take over the Browns' football operations. I'm sorry, did I say "take over?" This must be a newly created position, because the Browns don't have any football operations to speak of.

•In an SI poll, the majority of NFL players think Roger Goodell is doing a bang-up job. This means nothing if we're grading on a curve, given his commissioner counterparts.

•I take back everything I said about Tracy McGrady not being a worthy all-star. After three points in eight minutes in his season debut, I'm convinced he could take on the East 1v5 and take them easily.

•••••

That's it from me. The daywalkers will be with you presently.

Mike Holmgren will wield power over an NFL fiefdom from the turf for the last time (in theory) Sunday when the Seahawks scare the Cardinals into actually playing their starters. In thanks for the many years of almost achieving final victory, his players gathered up the cash to buy Holmgren his favorite toy: a new Harley.

Players were coy about the source of the money and the idea, but Seahawks fans showed concern on local sports talk radio when concussion-prone QB Matt Hasselbeck legitimately couldn't seem to remember how the idea came about. Or where his car keys were. Or why he wasn't wearing pants. Again. (Maybe he was just mimicking Coach.)

Holmgren Rides Off Practice Field in Style [Seahawks Notebook]
Coach Mike Holmgren gets new Harley Davidson [Seahawk Nation]

Holmgren, obviously, wasn't happy.

"There are not a lot of secrets, but I think those things probably, they should probably tell you if they're going to try and do that," Holmgren said. "Or ask you, and if you say no, they should honor that request. I would rather they didn't do that."

It shouldn't cause too much trouble for Holmgren; he says the chart changes every week, which is good, considering how Seattle's offense looked Sunday. We do love the helpful little hints in the bottom right hand corner, though. "JUST CALL IT!" "RUN!" We now want Mike Holmgren to write a self-help book.

Mike Holmgren's Game Plan [Enjoy The Enjoyment]
It's All In The Cards [Seattle Times]

It's common knowledge what the life of a NFL coach entails during the season. The grueling 18-hour work days, suffocating pressure and lack of job security ensures that most of them are not the most fun people to be around. Their families sometimes feel the full brunt of this. For every unhealthily obsessed successful coach, there are always the accompanying battle scars of their success: sleeping in the office, hypertension and, most often, a total lack of recognition for what goes on in the outside world between August and January.

Sometimes, there's more serious collateral damage from this sacrifice - your family. Andy Reid's sons are currently atop the coaching casualty list thanks to their recent legal indiscretions and emotional troubles. Of course, it's a little quick to call them totally hopeless. Much of what the Reid kids are going through (in particular, the pill-popping, swerve-driving Britt) can be chalked up to just plain old growing pains. Granted, he's 22, a legal adult, but come on, who didn't do dumb shit when they were in their late teens/early 20s?

I know I did. In fact, I spent three separate nights in jail before my 22nd birthday. The charges:

• 1991, Ocean City, N.J.: Underage drinking
• 1992, Sea Isle City, N.J.: Underage drinking, public urination, indecent exposure
• 1995, Bethlehem, Pa: Public intoxication, assaulting police officer (dropped)

It's different, obviously, since I don't blame those little missteps on an absentee father. I'm more a product of my environment. It's definitely a gritty life in the farm animal-shaped, mailbox-lined streets of Churchville, Pa. When you spend a childhood riding Huffy bikes around well-lit cul-de-sacs, splashing around in-ground pools and playing soccer at St. Vincent De Paul's, ya grow up hard. Thank God I got out of there. I'd either be dead or in prison.

Andy Reid's troubled children may not be direct results of his profession. But Andy's all-night film sessions and meticulous coaching nature leave little time for him to be a part of his family's everyday life. Britt Reid won't be the last to get swallowed up by this cruel reality of the NFL coaching lifestyle. In fact, given his "problems," he actually might be one of the lucky ones.

So this week, I'm running around, robbing banks all wacked off of Scooby Snacks, and placing odds on the next NFL coach's family to fall apart.

Let's go check in on that cat and silver spoon, after this MORE.

Brian Billick: 1/2

This guy's been a dick since the first moment a microphone was stuck in his face. The Baltimore Ravens head coach is an unabashed self-centered tyrant, a bully, and there's not an airplane hangar big enough to store his ego. Brian Billick is convinced that's the solar system buzzing around his head each day. His approach to coaching has to spill over to family life, and it's probably his younger daughter Keegan who'll most likely suffer. How awful must it be to grow up in a house with a Dad who's written a book called " Competitive Leadership: 12 Principles for Success"? She probably related to Little Miss Sunshine on a personal level. Now, she's a college field hockey player at THE Ohio State, but who's to say she's not spending her weekends carving "Fuck You Dad" into her forearm with a screwdriver and taking her patriarchal frustrations out on top of the faces of the Buckeyes offensive line? Yeah, DAD, which chapter talks about how I can be "successful" at THAT?

Mike Holmgren:1/1

Another hot-head who has probably missed most of his family life due to football. Holmgren's temper is legendary, and he's always resorted to barking orders and having very little patience for people who don't respect them. Just ask Marty Mornhinweg about the time he played a tape of Holmgren's high school doo-wop group for Packers players. Marty shit a ghost. So far, it appears like Holmgren's dodged a bullet with his four daughters — one's a successful doctor, another's a lawyer — but resentments have a way of festering and revealing themselves later in life. Sure, Dr. Calla Holmgren sounds like she's got her act together, but there's a reason she chose gynecology as her medicinal field. She grew up hating men. Oh, and she loves a daily dose of uterine lining. YOUR FAULT, Coach.

Mike Nolan:1/3

The San Francisco 49ers coach's decision to wear a suit on the sidelines tells you a lot about his character. The man likes to keep up appearances and has no tolerance for people lacking self-respect.
He's young, but he embraces a military-sense of discipline. His poor sons have probably had a childhood of daily bed checks and inspirational sayings from Korean War vets taped to their foreheads while they sleep. Of course his two young daughters can look forward to their young adult years filled with constant demands for longer skirts, extra buttons on blouses and background checks on all their boyfriends. Nolan should be hopeful their rebellion doesn't come in the form of double-teaming Kevan Barlow one day. But his sons will probably live a life comparable to Ricky Fitts, wandering around with video cameras videotaping their neighbors reading on the toilet.

Bill Belichick: 1/8

He's just terrifying. Growing up with Bill Belichick must have been like growing up with Martin Sheen when he was filming Apocalypse Now. Just a dark, haunted man, whose connection to humanity was lost sometime during his press conference turning down the Jets job. After that, he willingly accepted the Robert Kraft anal probe and left all remnants of his past life behind. His soon to be Rutgers Lacrosse playing son, Stephen, has already been busted for smoking pot. Most likely, Belichick's already given up on the other two and left them to fend for themselves and learn their life lessons on their own; it's a cold and cruel world, but you must learn to survive in it wearing only a gray sweatshirt.

Anyway, it's the Seahawks, who look like they might stumble into an NFC West title after all, hosting the Packers tonight on what appears to be Favre's final Monday Night Football appearance. (In other words, expect about 80 references to and highlights of that game he won after his dad died.) By our calculations, there's only one compelling MNF matchup left this year, Cincinnati at Indianapolis on December 18, and that's only if the Bengals don't fold it in by then. Even the doubleheader on Christmas night is a little lacking, unless Terrell Owens decides to try to kill himself again.

But here's your thread, anyway, if you wanna chat about the game tonight. (We're gonna do this for Thursday's game too, even if a ton of you won't be able to watch it.) Count the number of times that it sounds like Tony Kornheiser is about to say something negative toward Favre, and then changes his mind. We think you can actually hear him reign himself in.

Well, enjoy, anyway.

The NFL's reigning most valuable player is crediting the power of prayer for possibly healing the cracked bone in his left foot. The foot stopped hurting Tuesday and word spread as Alexander began alerting friends and family. Alexander's brother, Durran, confirmed this today and said his famous brother plans to undergo additional tests today. These stories are rare but not without precedent. Reggie White credited prayer for healing his injured hamstring, allowing him to play for the Green Bay Packers in 1995.

Unfortunately, Jesus isn't in charge of the depth chart: Mike Holmgren is, and he reminded Alexander that, uh, dude, your foot is freaking broken. So Alexander might have Jesus as his co-pilot, but Maurice Morris is still going to be driving.

See, Shaun: It's obviously that you just didn't pray hard enough. What a lousy Christian you are.

Alexander Feels Like Dancing, But Tests, And Holmgren, Say No [Seattle Times]
Jesus Heals Seahawks Running Back [Seattlest]