Texas Tech boosters who have donated their hard-earned oil dollars to their favorite school's athletic department can rest easy knowing that $20 has been put to good use. A bucket of black paint and some used pirate stencils and head coach Mike Leach has himself a new parking spot. It's about time, if you ask me. How they even called themselves a football program before this moment is beyond me.

It's just too bad that Graham Harrell didn't live to see this.

Mike Leach's Parking Spot Gets a Makeover [Wiz of Odds]

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Good Morning, Thursday. How about Cobain as Bon Jovi? This one's for Emeritus because his angst amuses me.

Texas Tech and Mike Leach have finally agreed to a contract extension after more than 10 months of negotiations, keeping the football coach at the school through 2013, a source with knowledge of the talks told The Dallas Morning News on Thursday.

Leach met with Tech chancellor Kent Hance for almost three hours Thursday afternoon and the two sides have agreed to Tech's $12.7 million offer that will extend Leach's current two-year deal three more seasons. The contract hasn't been signed, but that could take place as early as Friday, the source said.

At the heart of the nearly year-long standoff between Leach and the university were four contract clauses, three of which had to do with early termination/departure.The school had given him a Tuesday deadline to sign the contract, but as we writers all know, deadlines are for mocking, not making.

Anyway, party tonight in Lubbock.

Texas Tech, Mike Leach Agree On Contract Extension [Dallas Morning News]

Texas Tech quarterback Graham Harrell was a key part of the Big 12 passing orgy that dominated college football's storylines this season, but he has not been invited to Heisman Trophy presentation ceremony on Saturday. I guess the Downtown Athletic ClubSports Museum of America is worried that they'll run out of chairs.

Obviously, no one expects him to win and the committee has invited as few as three and as many as six finalists in past years. But it seems like he's earned the right to at least get a free trip to New York and pretend-clap while some other jerk wins a stupid trophy that he didn't want anyway. Don't you agree, Mike Leach?

"If Graham is not invited to the Heisman, they ought to quit giving out the award," he said in a statement. "It is a shameless example of politics ruling over performance."

Leach then hocked a loogie into a spittoon and shoved a half-empty bottle of whiskey into his saddlebag before storming off to find a poker game. He was a little upset.

Texas Tech's Graham Harrell misses out on Heisman nod [Dallas Morning News]
Graham Harrell's Absence in New York a Flaw of Heisman System, Not Voters [Bleacher Report]

Harrell's made some news lately because he's become a little too yappy about the future of his head coach, Mike Leach. Last week, Harrell spouted off to the AP that he thought Leach would ditch Texas Tech after this season, but has quickly backpedaled. But he still thinks his coach, wherever he goes, will be very rich man:

"They're going to have to pay him a lot of money, as anyone will at this point...[H]e does more with less than anyone in the country. He can't go hand-choose his recruits like the USCs, the Oklahomas and the Texases. He has to really work at recruiting, get some less-talented players and develop them."

For sure. Look what he did with this naive boy dressed in a black, gift-covered cardigan?

Harrell thinks Leach will stay at Texas Tech [SI]

1." Did they block the Lions game out again?" (I say I have no idea that I'm from Nashville and just landed in Michigan.) "Oh well, it doesn't matter. Fuck the Lions. I'd rather watch whoever else is playing anyway."

2." The Lions are up 17-0? Damn. Wonder how long it will take them to lose that lead?"

3. "Do you care if we change the channel for just a sec. to see what they're saying about the auto bailout?"

4. "You're from Tennessee? I wish Rodriguez would move to Tennessee and die."

5. "Did you know Ford had to buy the Thanksgiving game tickets this year because no one was buying them? They're selling them to employees for $30 each. I heard no one is buying them even though that's less than half what they actually cost. Boy, when I was a kid that Thanksgiving game was the best."

So be thankful you aren't a sports fan from Michigan. And if you are a sports fan from Michigan? Yeah, sorry, you're screwed. On to the college football round-up.

Oklahoma toasted Texas Tech. Just one day after I announced I had a crush on Mike Leach. This game was kind of like going for a piss, opening the bathroom door, and seeing your crush ski-poling two random guys she met at a fraternity party. Even still, in the great "Will it be, Leach, Brian Kelly, or Lane Kiffin as the next UT coach-debate?", I'm with Leach.

Also, Brent Musberger attempting to pronounce Beyonce's name during the promos for the American Music Awards should put an end to the old-announcers attempt to read promos business. Just put it on the screen. Also, was I the only person who thought that while he discussed the Beyonce mispronunciation Herbstreit was thinking, "I could bang Beyonce if I wanted to." It was the subtext of the entire conversation.

Finally, granted Texas Tech got destroyed, but all they need is an Oklahoma loss on the road at Oklahoma State and they win the tiebreak over Texas head to the Big 12 Title Game. Win that and wouldn't it be hard to put Texas in above them in the BCS Title Game?

Washington State wins in overtime over Washington. The only thing better than a game between two teams who have combined for one win? An overtime game that ends with one team missing a short field goal and the other team making one.

Penn State contributed to the continued collapse of Michigan's self-esteem by beating the only decent team in the state. We've spent enough time on this. Congrats to Penn State on their first Rose Bowl in 14 years. Condolences on Joe Pa announcing he's returning for a 44th season. Meanwhile, Michigan was destroyed by Ohio State to put a merciful end to their season. The Terrelle Pryor Rich Rod picture will never die.

Charlie Weis is a genius! Did anyone else see the snowballs that someone threw right after the missed field goal at the end of Notre Dame's loss to Syracuse? Was this supposed to be a celebratory snowball? Because somehow that snowball bursting open when it landed on the field was the perfect metaphor for the Weis era at Notre Dame. Well, okay, not as good of a metaphor as Weis getting wrecked on the sideline against Michigan, but close.

Also, how many more years does NBC Sports have to pretend they still have a sports department by showing Notre Dame games? Remember back when NBC Sports had the NBA and the NFL? Doesn't that seem like it never happened now? I know NBC has Sunday Night Football, but there's something about their sports coverage that seems wistful for 1988. Even down to the dark, Seinfeld-esque color schemes in their telecasts. Not as wistful as Notre Dame fans are for 1988 or in believing that Urban Meyer will leave Florida to come be their coach, but close.

Tennessee beat Vanderbilt despite passing for only 22 yards. We didn't complete a pass in the entire first half. Four different people played quarterback for Tennessee. Only one of them completed a pass (unless you count Jonathan Crompton's interception on his only pass attempt). There's no existing film from UT's games back in the 1930's. Now, at least I have an idea what the offense would have looked like in person.

Oregon State is a win over Oregon away from their first Rose Bowl since 1965. Lucky for the Rose Bowl that game would be a rematch. This is perfect. Anyone who favors a college football playoff should root for the Rose Bowl to get screwed every year. The bastards think their single game is more important than the rest of college football. Enjoy.

Maryland controlled their own destiny in the and got waxed by Florida State; Miami had the Atlantic Division wrapped up and got destroyed as well. Now I think Boston College controls their own fate. So if they beat Maryland, they're in. But if they lose Florida State is in. So at least there's some finality there. Same with Virginia Tech, win and they're in. Swell, a rematch between two teams that were better last year. To see who gets waxed by another team in the BCS.

Cincinnati and Brian Kelly are headed to the BCS provided they can get the win over Syracuse. Did anyone else think Erin Andrews was slamming the Cincinnati fans every time she did a sideline report. At least twice she pointed out that the fans weren't excited enough. I think this was her revenge for being sent to a night game in Cincinnati in November.

Utah beat BYU and is now 12-0. They're up to number 6 in the BCS standings. What's the route to the BCS Title Game for Utah? I'll tell you. Alabama loses to Auburn, Florida loses to Florida State then beats Alabama in the SEC Title Game. Oklahoma loses to Oklahoma State, Texas Tech loses to Baylor, and Texas loses to Missouri in the Big 12 Title Game. Then, I think, Utah would play USC for the BCS Championship. See, Ute fans, the BCS is an infallible and fair system. You've got a shot too!

Already Obama put some dents in the Republican South by winning North Carolina, Virginia, and Florida. Southern states like Kentucky, Tennessee, Georgia, Arkansas, and Louisiana went for Bill Clinton and have demonstrated that they will vote for southern Democrats. Neither Obama nor his Vice President is Southern, but, and this is key, they do hate the BCS. An opinion that is shared, conservatively, by 99.9% of all Southerners. (The only thing we're more in favor of down here is pre-marital abstinence for everyone but yourself.) Keep attacking the BCS and pretty soon those favorability ratings are going to climb in Tennessee and Georgia and Alabama. Not to mention Mississippi and Louisiana. Even Texas and Oklahoma. Anyway, something to think about when there isn't much to think about after this week's status quo round of games. Obama is already crazy like a fox. If he brings down the BCS, no Republican on earth is beating him in 2012.

1. Florida beat Spurrier and South Carolina 56-6. This is the worst loss of Steve Spurrier's coaching career. Prior to this game South Carolina's defense was number 3 in the nation and the most points they'd given up all season was 24. Remember when Tim Tebow cried and said no one was ever going to work harder after the Ole Miss loss? And you and all your friends made fun of him for crying? Yeah, he was right. And it pains me to say this but no one is beating Florida for the reason of the season. And it's possible no game will be close.

2. The long march towards the ACC Championship remains steeped in confusion. Miami now holds the Coastal Division lead at 4-2 but has two road games (at Georgia Tech and at N.C. State remaining). If Tech wins then we're all set for our four-way 5-3 tie. Meanwhile, with their win over North Carolina, Maryland — Maryland! — has surged into the lead of the Atlantic Division. But I almost feel like even writing about the ACC race is steeped in futility.

3. After their Friday night win over Louisville all Cincinnati has to do to win the Big East is beat Pitt next week and then close out with a road win over Syracuse. But if Pitt wins then the Big East would come down to the West Virginia-Pitt game on the final week of the season. Can you imagine the television ratings that a Cincinnati-Utah BCS game would get? The Fox network might assassinate Brian Kelly. Thank god we've got the BCS to put together four games that no one cares about.

4. Remember a couple of weeks ago when Tulsa was undefeated and in the top 20. Then they lost to Arkansas? Yeah, Houston just dropped 70 on them on Saturday. Including 63 in the first three quarters. Also, don't look now but Rice is now contending to win their division in Conference USA. The nerds are inheriting the football turf.

5. Oregon State continued their run towards the Rose Bowl with a win over Cal. Now they have a game at Arizona and close out at home against Oregon. Win both and they're in for the first time since 1965.

6. Vandy is bowl eligible for the first time since 1982 thanks to their win over Kentucky. (Talk about a bad weekend in the Bluegrass...the Wildcat basketball team lost to Stonewall Jackson's VMI.) This ended the longest bowl drought from a big 6 conference school. Baylor, without a bowl since 1994, the football made of feces is now in your hands. Vandy's D.J. Moore is the best player you've never heard of. He scored two touchdowns at receiver and intercepted two passes. You're going to want your team to draft him when he comes out early this fall. Now the 'Dores have opened as a 3.5 point favorite over Tennessee. Meaning the end of the world is truly nigh.

7. Alabama, Texas, Penn State, and USC all held serve. Meaning nothing changed in the BCS rankings. Oh, and Utah is 11-0 and Boise State is now 10-0. But no one's really paying attention to either team. For now there is one game and one game only, Texas Tech at Oklahoma. Let the planning begin. Personally, I'm watching Texas Tech-Oklahoma without any pants. Which is completely normal.

1. Mike Leach is Blackbeard. This is how the negotiations should go to make him Tennessee's next coach. a. Rent a dumptruck b. fill dumpruck with cash c. drive dumptruck to Lubbock d. dump money in Leach's front yard. e. repeat until contract is signed. Right now Mike Hamilton should be on eBay trying to buy Blackbeard's sword and then offer to dip it in the blood of a virgin (hint she won't be a Tri-Delt in Knoxville) for signing.

There should be a stat for how often Leach's receivers score touchdowns without being touched. It's uncanny. In fact, I'm making it up right now. Le Leach. That's French for "the Leach." People in Lubbock are very worldly, they'll love this. Here's Le Leach giving the weather.

It's always sunny in Knoxville, Mike, always.

2. Iowa's Daniel Murray hadn't made a field goal since the first game of the season. Then he drilled a 31 yarder to beat Penn State by one. Credit to Iowa's coaching staff for accepting the holding penalty on the next-to-last play for Penn State. They'd stopped Penn State on third down but elected to give them another shot after moving them back ten yards. I was cursing the stupidity of this decision when the Penn State wide receiver came wide open in the middle of the field, but Darryl Clark airmailed it for a pick. Meanwhile, please tell me Daniel Murray didn't play it cool after he made this field goal. I'm hoping he showered, went straight to the sorority house and started clambanging. If he didn't, can we rescind the win?

Right now, you should definitely be thinking to yourself, this guy just clarified the BCS? Yeah, he did.

3. Florida destroyed Vanderbilt. The only time Florida didn't score on their first 7 drives was when the refs inexplicably missed a Percy Harvin touchdown and ruled that he fumbled. You know in horror movies where the villian of the film suddenly realizes he's even more powerful than he ever thought he was? This is Urban Meyer right now. Somewhere there's a hero that can slay him, but I'll be damned if I can find one.

Be honest, if you had to pick a team to win the national championship today, you'd pick Florida, wouldn't you? In later years the fact that Hailey and Hanna Nutt's dad went to Gainesville and won with this Ole Miss team is going to seem even more remarkable than it does now. As for the Alabama-Florida SEC Championship Game, I've got the feeling the folks in Miami are upset their BCS Title game is going to be upstaged a month early.

4, North Carolina is going to win the ACC's Coastal Division...maybe. The Tar Hells smacked around Georgia Tech 28-7. At least that seems somewhat likely. We'll have a better idea after Virginia Tech and Miami play on Thursday night. Win and Virginia Tech will have the tiebreak over North Carolina should both win out. But given the clusterfuck that is the ACC this year, who knows?

5. How has LSU's Jarrett Lee gotten a pass on being the worst quarterback in college football? Lee has 14 interceptions. 14! What's worse than this? 6 of those picks have been returned for touchdowns. God, if only Ryan Perrilloux were still eligible. Only, Perrilloux has 12 interceptions while playing for the Jacksonville State Gamecocks.

On the exact opposite score, how good is Alabama's Julio Jones going to be by the time he's a junior. The NFL mandate that guys stay for at least three years in college makes players like Jones into Gods. Seriously, who is going to cover this guy next year or the year after? If Julio could leave after this season he'd already be a first-round pick. At least there's no history of Alabama receivers getting injured because they couldn't leave early.

And with this hat selection, the number of children born in Alabama named Julio will increase 14,000,000%.

6. Cincinnati goes into Morgantown/Deadwood and wins 26-23 to take the inside track to the Big East's BCS bid. Beat Pitt at home on November 21 and get past Louisville and Syracuse and Cincinnati will be in the BCS. I know, ridiculous, right? Let's be honest, how many years is Bill Stewart going to be at West Virginia? Two years at most?

7. Tennessee lost to Wyoming. I know, I know, I'm really questioning a lot of things about my life right now. One of them is this, say UT's players called every play on offense from inside the huddle by the quarterback sketching the routes on his hand. Could we score more than a touchdown in a game? I'm thinking yes. That offensive coordinator money has been really well spent this year and the Clawfense is appropriately named if only because I'd rather claw my eyes out than watch it any longer.

To help clear the palate, here are two more pictures of Hailey and Hanna rocking the football uniform.

Ohio State (-11) at Northwestern- Who's rooting harder for Ohio State to finish the rest of the season without a blemish than Penn State fans? The answer is no one. Back in 2004 Northwestern upset Ohio State. Fresh off their road upset of Minnesota can Northwestern pull off another shocker? A noon kickoff probably helps. But having intelligent football players probably hurts. Damn.

Georgia Tech at North Carolina (-4)- The ACC is a swamp of mediocrity. Every team in the Coastal Dvision of the ACC already has two losses. The loser of this game will definitely be eliminated from contention. I think. But who really knows? A win and UNC has their first winning season since 2001. Tech's quarterback, Josh Nesbitt, may not be able to play. Enjoy.

Alabama (-3.5) at LSU- - Coming soon, a congressional inquiry into how LSU fans are capable of figuring out football player's cell phone numbers. Two weeks ago Knowshon and Stafford responded to their cell phone numbers being leaked with their best games of the season? Can JPW do the same? Who knows? Better question, how many people in Alabama commit suicide if Bama loses to LSU and then finds a way to lose to an awful Auburn team for the 7th year in a row, meaning they don't even win the SEC West. Over/under is 15. Including the always eloquent Cowboy.

Kansas State at Missouri (-27.5)- The over/under on this game opened at 74. That's truly unbelievable. Well, that and the fact that everyone has written off Missouri as a factor in the national scene. Am I the only one who sees Missouri upsetting the Big 12 South winner in the Big 12 title game? Yeah? Oh well.

Florida (-24) at Vandy- Since losing to Ole Miss 31-30 Florida has outscored their past four SEC opponents 201-43. Included were two top ten wins over Georgia and LSU. That's an average of 50-10. Now they get Vandy. A team that scored 7 points against Duke to lose their third consecutive game. This is going to be incredibly ugly. It's a good thing ESPN picked up this game for national broadcast.

Penn State (-7) at Iowa- Can Penn State stop Iowa's tailback Shon Greene from running? If so, they'll blow Iowa out. If they can't, this game might give Joe Paterno heartburn. That's provided, of course, that he actually realizes what the stakes are for his team that remains slotted at BCS #3. Earlier this week Paterno was confused whether it was BCS or BSC. This is Penn State's last road game.

Arizona (-41) at Washington State- In their last two games Washington State has been outscored 127-0. That's bad. What's worse? In their last five games WSU has been outscored 284-30. WSU's defense averages giving up 49.4 points a game. Is there any doubt that the Washington-Washington State game is going to be the most futile "rivalry" game in the country this year? 1-10 vs. 0-10. I can't wait.

Oklahoma State at Texas Tech (-3)- If you don't really have a rooting interest, don't you have to favor Mike Leach in the BCS Title game? Most coaches are circumspect and reserved. Leach is an insane lawyer who graduated from Pepperdine and, wife and child in tow, took a coaching job for $7,000 a year . By the way, if you haven't read Michael Lewis's profile piece on Leach from three years ago in the New York Times, now is the time to do it. One of the best profiles I've ever read. Sample line: Each off-season, Leach picks something he is curious about and learns as much as he can about it: Geronimo, Daniel Boone, whales, chimpanzees, grizzly bears, Jackson Pollock.

Cal at USC (-22)- Do you ever get the feeling that no matter how much the linemaker installs USC as favorites by the line is going to move higher? And USC is still going to find a way to cover. I'm picturing some sallow-skinned man sitting in front of a bank of computers slowly pulling out his red hair while game film of Pete Carroll strutting down the sideline plays on a constant loop. Yep, it just happened again. USC opened as 17 point favorites and now they're up to 22.