Chris Kluwe Signs With The Oakland Raiders

It looks like our boy has finally found work. Chris Kluwe punted for the Minnesota Vikings for eight years, but was cut 10 days ago to make room for a younger, cheaper option: rookie punter Jeff Locke out of UCLA. In his time at Minnesota, he carved out a resume as maybe the best punter in franchise history. As the…

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If You Stole Jerome Simpson's Shoes And Tea Set, Please Return Them

Vikings wide receiver Jerome Simpson had a rough Sunday. While the rest of us were kicking back, having a few beers, and enjoying an exciting finish to the Masters, Simpson was getting a hard lesson in the cold and uncaring nature of our world. That's because some asshole stole two pairs of Air Jordans and a $600…

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The Vikings Sex Boat Is Back On The Water

The Minnetonka Queen is no more. The 64-foot Skipperliner, which infamously hosted a Vikings sex party in which Fred Smoot used a double-ended dildo on two call girls, has been laid up in drydock for far too long. Now it's been given new life. As the Scandalous, it will ply the gentle waves of Iowa.

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Seahawks Trade For Percy Harvin

Seattle, just two points from the NFC Championship game, gets another fancy toy for its emerging star quarterback to play with. The Seahawks have acquired Percy Harvin from Minnesota for draft picks, and just like that, the two early favorites for 2013 are both in the NFC West.

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38A

Chris Kluwe And Brendon Ayanbadejo File A "Cockmonster"-Free…

Vikings punter Chris Kluwe and Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo have been the most outspoken proponents of gay marriage in the NFL, if not in all of sports. This fall, they found themselves on the right side of gay-marriage referendums in their respective states, Minnesota and Maryland, whereupon both Kluwe and…

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