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MLS Will Ride The USWNT's Coattails By Having Floats In Victory Parade

If the TV ratings for the USWNT’s obliteration of Japan in the 2015 Women’s World Cup final—it was the most-watched soccer game in U.S. history—stood for anything, it’s that Americans will support the sporting greatness of our own unreservedly. Unfortunately, the vultures in charge of the inferior soccer product MLS… » 7/09/15 2:49pm 7/09/15 2:49pm

MLS Invents New Rule To Help Big-Market Teams

Traversing MLS’s ever-shifting labyrinth of player transaction rules has always been nigh-impossible. And somehow or other, now the league has sprouted yet another alleyway to get lost in. Luckily, no matter how winding the path is, you always wind up in the same place: whatever’s best for the big-city teams. » 7/08/15 5:53pm 7/08/15 5:53pm

Looks Like Cristiano Ronaldo And MLS Are Tugging Each Other Off

Surprise, surprise. There are more whispers and rumors linking MLS with another aging star—in this case, Cristiano Ronaldo. And while the MLS- and Ronaldo-friendly version of events doesn’t make too much sense on its face, it’s not to hard to reverse engineer what’s most likely going on here. (That it might appeal to… » 4/24/15 5:11pm 4/24/15 5:11pm

MLS Players And Owners Agree To Keep League Mired In Mediocrity

We're still in the process of digesting last night's surprise CBA accord between MLS and its players. Until or unless we get to dig into the specifics, it'll be difficult to judge exactly how the new agreement will affect those involved. Of course, the specifics will mainly be of interest for those outside the game,… » 3/05/15 2:36pm 3/05/15 2:36pm

Iker Casillas Hopes To Become Overpaid By MLS One Day

Real Madrid legend Iker Casillas has had a rough go of it these past few years. The goalkeeper has seen his previously blemish-free legacy tarnished by the hand of a vindictive manager, lost a considerable amount of support from a fanbase that once idolized him, suffered a cratering of confidence, and now looks likely… » 1/27/15 5:21pm 1/27/15 5:21pm

MLS Is Putting The Fix In For Toronto FC, Right Before Our Eyes

Not that this is any real secret, but it deserves to be said as often as possible: MLS is rigged. The league jointly owns each individual team, centrally controls all major decisions, and has a rule book as regularly erased and written over as a chalk board. With yesterday's reported news that Juventus forward… » 1/19/15 2:08pm 1/19/15 2:08pm

Fans Righteously Pissed At Realizing NYCFC Is A Glorified Farm Team

The strange Frank Lampard/NYCFC/Manchester City love triangle always felt like it was going to end in a bit of a train wreck, with Lampard's stay with City set to end this month and the MLS expansion club counting on him to be its face. Well, that train just jumped the tracks: Lampard is staying in England, and fans… » 1/02/15 12:18pm 1/02/15 12:18pm

MLS Commissioner Has Some Dumb Shit To Say About Jürgen Klinsmann

USMNT coach Jürgen Klinsmann has taken up one of his favorite pastimes recently: criticizing the U.S.'s subpar domestic soccer. Last week, Klinsmann made waves by coming out in support of a promotion-relegation system. On Tuesday, he took time to lament the return to MLS of America's best players, namely Michael… » 10/16/14 12:41pm 10/16/14 12:41pm

MLS Expands To Atlanta, Because The Quality Of Play Was Just Too High

Major League Soccer boosters are always going on (and on) about how much the league is growing, and whether or not there's anything to the more outrageous claims about the league's popularity, they have a point in at least one sense: the league is definitely getting larger. Last week, for instance, MLS announced that… » 4/21/14 4:12pm 4/21/14 4:12pm

Getting Ready For MLS? Allow Us To Convince You Otherwise

It's about that time of the year again! Timber Joey is gassing up his chainsaw, Thierry Henry is stretching those creaking joints, and Michael Bradley is getting ready to lace up his boots, the prodigal son back on (well, North) American soil after so many years away. Yep, Major League Soccer, the land of has-beens… » 3/06/14 3:37pm 3/06/14 3:37pm