Here's your backstory:

Many, many years ago President Andrew Jackson forced the Creek Indians who lived around Talladega to give up their land and relocate to the west. The Indian removal policy was a shameful episode of American history that included the infamous Trail of Tears.

There is a legend that as the Creek were leaving the valley the tribe's medicine man looked back on their home one last time and placed a curse upon it.

Fast forward more than 100 years to the time when Talladega Superspeedway was built in 1969. Over the 40 years since then various calamaties[sic]have befallen various drivers at the track and an urban legend arose that the cause was the curse placed on the land.

Alright. According to Wikipediastic research by our friends at Style Points, the following is but one example of the bizarre events that have occurred to those who dared to tread, um, tread on the famed race track:

In 1973, Bobby Isaac left his car during the race on lap 90 because of voices he claimed to have heard which told him to park his car and get out. Earlier on lap 14 in the same race, young driver Larry Smith died in a seemingly minor wreck. To some, Bobby Allison's 1987 wreck described above was yet another reminder of the curse. In 1993, Bobby's son, Davey Allison, died in a helicopter crash in the infield of Talladega.

Yikes. It seems to me that the Talladega Speedway is a Bermuda Triangle of sorts, except it's not located in the middle of the ocean and no one has disappeared. But it's similar.

Thrower himself understands how many may find his ceremony somewhat amusing and silly, but he believes this is a great opportunity to teach people a little bit about the aboriginal culture of the area.

"We ask for your hand upon each driver," Thrower said in offering a prayer to God. "Let this talk of a curse be no more. Let the protection of your hand be a testament to your power."

Thrower said he wasn't suggesting that a curse has been in effect all these years or that it played a role in any calamaties at the track.

"This thing about a curse," he said. "A lot of times that's people's perceptions."

Indeed. And my perception is that the average fan of NASCAR doesn't give two craps about any gosh darn ritual. Unless it has to do with raising Dale Earnhardt from the dead.

I tell you one goddamned thing: "The Intimidator" wouldn't have put up with any shit from some no good Injun spirits. And that's a fact, Jack.

Creek medicine man lifts "curse" from Talladega Superspeedway [The Birmingham News]
Talladega Now Free Of Pesky Turn 3 Spirits [Style Points]

For those of us who saw "The Final Destination" in motherfuckin' 3D, which, obviously, is all of us present here, because seeing dumb kids die on film is definitely something we can all come together around, whether we want to do Ben What's-His-Roethles-Burger in the rear or not, we are anticipating some really gruesome irony of the 9/11 Happened To ME! variety. How is the 9/11 race car a good idea, just conceptually speaking? The whole point of 9/11 is to avoid shit blowing up, even if the Coast Guard apparently didn't get that memo. And to do some awesome tailgating.

Also isn't it kind of weak if your 9/11 car loses on 9/11? And everyone is like "Oh and then that 9/11 car came in 8th, sad, let's NEVER FORGET that."

Since here we are, let's never forget the one really awesome thing George W. Bush did.

This is the vision of artist Katie Cooper who explains Baby Racing Jesus this way:

"I picture him coming back today, to save those who have claimed him as their savior. What would that Jesus have to be like, to want to save people like us? He would have to be a fan of consumption. He would constantly have jingles and advertisements running through his mind, and would be moving too busily and too quickly to stop and take a breath. When thirsty, this Jesus would want to grab a cold one. The King of Kings and the King of Beers are together at last. NASCAR Jesus."

Well, duh. Of course, Jesus would like cold ones. He's an American, isn't he? On the other hand, NASCAR fans aren't the people he has to win over. I hope he likes drinking white wine spritzers in the luxury boxes, too.

NASCAR JESUS [All Left Turns]

* * * * *

Spin the wheel and it's Thursday morning. The circle of life continues.

Cops were called to Mayfield's property on Saturday night, after neighbors heard someone yelling and banging on the front door. When the arrived they found Lisa Mayfield, drunk as a skunk and threatening everyone in sight.

"According to the officers she was pretty high," Cook said. "The officers took her to jail on public assistance ... to make sure she didn't cause problems to anybody or herself.

The Mayfield Mom also allegedly kicked a couple of the neighbors, one of whom was pregnant, and threatened to come back and kill Jeremy's wife as the cops dragged her way. She was charged with public intoxication, simple assault, and second-degree trespassing. Mayfield still hasn't filed the wrongful death lawsuit that he claims will prove that Lisa killed his father (she has her own countersuit), but this drunken, violent rant won't add a ton of credibility to her claims about her stepson's meth habits.

There's only way to solve this dispute. A reality show. "Methin' With The Mayfields," Tuesday mornings at 4 a.m. on Versus.

Lisa Mayfield, Jeremy Mayfield's stepmother, arrested at his home [ESPN]

You see, just because Lisa Mayfield told NASCAR that her stepson is tweaked out on meth, that doesn't automatically give him the right to say she kills people. (Unless she does kill people! But that's why we have judges, right?) She's seeking compensatory damages and punitive damages, plus other "relief as the court may deem just and proper."

For his part, Mayfield The Younger is standing by his words, but still hasn't filed his wrongful death suit accusing her of killing his father, like he said he would. The "basically a whore" thing is more a judgment call, I guess.

Jeremy Mayfield of NASCAR sued for civil damages by stepmother Lisa Mayfield [ESPN]

Mayfield is accused of being a gigantic meth head, a charge he vigorously denies. He claims to have multiple clean drug tests from independent labs and that NASCAR spiked his failed drug tests. (This will be in court for awhile.) However, if you're trying to convince the world that you're a sober, level-headed citizen it won't help your cause to have people dig up old videos of you lighting random fires, packing watermelons with explosives, throwing M-80s at men with guns, and blowing up cans filled with gasoline. That doesn't exactly scream "responsible death machine operator."

Now we would also never allege that everyone who likes to blow shit up is a meth addict ... but if you are a meth addict, chances are you don't mind seeing shit blow up. Unless it's your meth lab. That's no fun at all.

Jeremy Mayfield Blowing Stuff Up! [YouTube, via Brooks]
Report: Mayfield claims NASCAR 'spiked' sample [Fox Sports]
Behind a Court Battle Over Mayfield's Suspension, Questions on Nascar's Drug Policy [NY Times]

Hershel McGriff's first race was in his family's sedan on an unpaved track. His first NASCAR race when Truman was in office. The point I'm making is, he's really really old (not that this is a handicap, apparently).

He's 81 to be exact. And depending on how qualifying goes today, he could become the oldest man to run a NASCAR series race. McGriff is attempting to make the field for this afternoon's NASCAR Camping World West Series event in Portland, Ore., 64 years after his first race there.

McGriff was personally invited to join NASCAR by Big Bill France, in its third year of existence. Back then, that meant driving his stock car around the country to each race track. He's racked up four Cup wins in his career, been named one of NASCAR's 50 greatest drivers, and was inducted into the Motorsport Hall Of Fame in 2006.

But he's no stranger to comebacks: he's had two retirements, 48 years apart. So if you're in Portland and want to know which car is his, just look for the one with the blinkers on.

McGriff bids for a return to racing at age 81 [AP]
Elderly Drivers In Fewer Accidents Than Others [Boston Globe]

UPDATE: He done qualified.

It's a changing world out there, even in the bastion of redneckness known warmly as the NASCAR circuit. Newspapers can't afford original, on-site race coverage, and meanwhile, Jeremy Mayfield admits to doing meth while circling a racetrack faster than he turned on his mother. The obvious solution: Dole out press passes to bloggers! NASCAR, to its credit, is anything but square.

Which is how we end up with the NASCAR Citizen Journalists Brigade To Save The Future Of Journalism, or whatever it's called today. But don't worry, newspaper reporters, because these bloggers are professionals. Some of them were your former co-workers. They're the ones who aren't wearing Tony Stewart's face.

After a lengthy review process, which included evaluating independent Web sites on professionalism, reporting and commentary, and use of social networking tools, 28 sites were invited to be part of the new media corps.

Members of the corps will have the opportunity to apply for media credentials but like all media, will be expected to abide by the standards of professional conduct (i.e. no autographs, photos with drivers, etc.) They will also have access to other media-driven events and teleconferences and NASCAR's media-only Web site. NASCAR will provide access to the information; it's up to the journalists to tell the story.

And no, we are not one of those 28 storytelling outlets in the NASCAR Amateur B-Loggers To Tout NASCAR's Awesomeness with access to free food on Sunday, provided you pay your way to the racetrack. Helicoptering in only when a methed-out driver calls his mother a gold-digging whore, it turns out, is neither professional nor social networky enough to merit a credential.

Oh, well. It's not like anyone ever needed a press pass to watch a good ol' wreck.

NASCAR Announces Citizen Journalist Media Corps [NASCAR.com]
NASCAR Citizen Journalism Media Corps [SportsJournalists.com]
EARLIER: Jeremy Mayfield Goes To War Against NASCAR

To recap: Mayfield tested positive for methamphetamines on May 9 and was suspended from driving on the circuit. He sued in protest and a U.S. District Court judge issued an injunction on July 1, lifting the suspension. On July 6, NASCAR administered another drug test that he also failed (again because of meth), so they went back to court yesterday to get the ban reinstated. In a surprise twist, their legal filing included a signed affidavit from Mayfield's stepmother, claiming that she has personally seen him use the drug at 30 times.

Well, Jeremy did not like that at all. He's filing a wrongful death suit against Lisa Mayfield, claiming she killed his father in 2007. (The death was officially ruled a suicide.)

"She knows what we've got on her," Mayfield said. "For her to come out and do this is pretty ballsy. Everybody that's ever known me knows I never, ever have been around her for more than 10 hours of my life. She's a gold digger. I knew that from Day 1." ....

"She's basically a whore," he told ESPN.com's David Newton. "She shot and killed my dad."

Oh my. This has certainly taken an unexpected turn. There are two possibilities here. Mayfield is right, and his gold digging stepmom killed his father and then ratted him out to his bosses—who are determined to destroy his career over some unexplained grudge. Or two: Mayfield is seriously whacked out on crank.

Or I suppose it could be both? Just because you're paranoid, that doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.

"Brian France out there talking about effective drug policy, it's kind of like Al Capone talking about effective law enforcement. And that's the way I feel about it. The pot shouldn't be calling the kettle black, you know what I'm saying? And I think the world needs to hear that, too."

[...]

"They're playing this high school [expletive], they better be ready," Mayfield said of NASCAR. "I'm coming after them in a big way. I'm prepared to go all the way and have the backing to do it if it takes everything I've got. I'm not going to back down for something I didn't do."

Well, he's definitely excited about something. No sponsor would touch Mayfield before yesterday and no matter what the truth is, this won't help. You may now commence the "redneck soap opera" jokes.

Jeremy Mayfield accuses stepmother Lisa Mayfield, NASCAR of lying [ESPN]
Mayfield vs. NASCAR gets real bizarre, Part II [Birmingham News]

In court filings today, NASCAR asserts that in addition to the test that led to his suspension in May, Mayfield failed a random drug test on July 6, with meth again showing up. You'd think after the first "false positive," Mayfield would have stopped taking Adderall and Claritin-D together. But you know how addictive those A.D.D./allergy medicine cocktails can be.

In addition, NASCAR filed an affadvit from Mayfield's stepmother, claiming she personally saw him use methamphetamine at least 30 times over seven years, first cooking it up himself, later buying it from others.

Mayfield's sticking to his guns, though:

"I don't trust anything NASCAR does, anything (program administrator) Dr. David Black does, never have, never will," Mayfield told The Associated Press in a phone interview.

"Now they got this lying (expletive) to tell lies about me, someone I am embarrassed even uses the Mayfield name. She's tried everything she can do to get money out of me, I won't help her, so I guess she found a way to get money from NASCAR by giving them an affidavit full of lies."

The legal wrangling over Mayfield's ban may be moot, as he's been unable to find a sponsor willing to let him race for them. May we suggest Carl Edwards' #99 Claritin Ford Fusion?

NASCAR: Mayfield again tests positive for meth [AP]

Courtesy of Sir Jay Busbee, Yahoo! sports blogging longshoreman.It's just two people sitting back-to-back against each other on old bar stools in the flatbed portion of a pick-up truck at the Milwaukee Mile NASCAR race. What's that you say? What about the fake leg strewn across the hood? That's Navy Seal-like preparation, man. On big race days, it's good to have a prosthesis handy. What if one of those tires comes flying over the fence and hacks your leg off? You'll be legless, bleeding to death, and forced to leave early because you'll need to get that replaced. Not these fans, though. No way. They're not missing one second of this race.

******

Good morning. It's Tueeeesday. Put on your fake leg and dance.

Davis, who is black, made an ill-advised turn on pit road that caused Gaughan to slam into his back bumper, creating major damage to both cars. Berry jumped out of the pit box to chase Davis back to the garage, shouting a stream of profanities along the way, and at least two witnesses say they heard a racial slur in there somewhere. (Take a guess which one.)

It's probably not news to anyone that NASCAR is dominated by Southerners who have a slightly different perspective on race relations than a elite, Northern liberal like myself. When people are angry they sometimes say thing they normally wouldn't—it doesn't appear that Berry said the slur directly at Davis as he chewed him out back in the garage, so yay for sensitivity—and the complex racial history of blah blah blah.... Berry's a jerk, Davis is taking the high road, and life will go on on the racing circuit. I'm sure Davis had heard a lot worse—and will hear plenty more before his driving career is over.

Crew chief suspended for using racial slur [AP]
NASCAR suspends crew chief after confrontation, use of racial slur [That's Racin']

Maybe you're the kind of person who considers your grandmother's funeral to be a "highlight" of your life, but most race fans probably don't see it that way. Even more insulting? The article that this picture and caption accompany erroneously claims that Earnhardt's nickname was "The Black Knight." Blaspheme!

Why is the Journal writing about NASCAR in the first place? They haven't gone bankrupt yet, have they? No, its just that some egghead professor has a theory that the sport is a descendant of medieval jousting, because fans travel from all over the country; hold days-long celebrations of mirth, music, food and wine (ok, Bud); admire the dangerous and suspenseful action; and revere the participants as if they were gods upon the Earth.

Yeah, that's also known as "every sport ever." Nice try.

The Wall Street Journal steps way over the line with NASCAR story [Detroit NASCAR Examiner]
Nascar's Roots May Go Way Back [Wall Street Journal]