"He's stupid," James said of Barkley. "That's all I have to say about that."

Hey now, Mr. Potty Mouth! That sort of filth won't fly in Cleveland! They may encourage that talk in some cesspool of a city like, oh, I don't know, New York, but...oh. Gotcha. Carry on then.

In actual basketball news, Cleveland stayed perfect at home with a 112-97 win over the Warriors. Lebron had 23 points, 7 rebounds, 8 assists, and 4 extremely weak taunts.

• Chris and the Hastily Installed Waterfront Condo Elevator: Ominous news for Raptors fans: Chris Bosh has only been a legitimate "super"star for about a month, and he's already showing up late to games. Sure, it was because he was trapped in the elevator of his condo building for almost an hour, but that's still no exc...what's that? I'm now being told it's "the perfect excuse".

"I was just heading to the game and I got stuck," said Bosh, who shook off an understandably slow first half to erupt for 15 of his 30 points in a decisive third quarter for the Raptors. "So I sat and reflected on life. Just chilled."

I think I know what he means: I often reflect on life by furiously clawing at the walls of enclosed spaces while crying like a little girl. And all that reflection seemingly paid off, as Bosh was able to focus the Raptors in a big 93-88 home win over the still-good Hawks (a game I was lucky enough to attend). Toronto now hits the road for games against the Lakers, Nuggets and Jazz. Good luck with those.

• That Old Gang of Mine: In other news, Kobe Bryant scored a season high 35 points as the Lakers beat the Dallas Insider Traders 114-107. Meanwhile, Shaq's other superstar former teammate (you know, the one who didn't go public about Shaq's alleged habit of paying women to keep quiet about sex) beat up on his old buddy in a different way - Dwyane Wade dropped 43 points as the Heat spanked the Suns 107-92. It was the first meeting between the teams since they swapped Shaq and Shawn Marion back in February. Steve Nash didn't play for Phoenix, as everyone knows Canadians don't play on American Thanksgiving weekend. It's a respect thing.

Charles Barkley trades barbs with Cleveland Cavaliers star Lebron James [Cleveland Plain Dealer]

Bosh elevates his game [The Globe and Mail]

Oden, who sat out last season with a knee injury, scored Portland's first points of the preseason with a pretty impressive dunk, going on to score 13 points in about 20 minutes. So now, let the hype begin. Here's the assessment of Young Frankenstein's debut from Blazers Edge:

I assume that the minute he stepped on the court everybody saw the difference between Greg Oden and not just everybody else in the game, but pretty much everybody else on the planet. I mean, “RAAAAAWWWR! GREG SMASH NOW!” What? Huh? Say, you’re pretty hu… “YOU MOVE NOW! GREG DUNK BIG!” Oh sorry…I was standing in your way there. My mistake. (I don’t mean to convey any limited conversational skills on Greg’s part…there just aren’t polite words and whole sentences for what he does out there. It’s primal.) His offense obviously needs some work, but then again what’s wrong with a back-down dribble, a spin, or an offensive rebound and then a monster slam? Sounds good to me.

More photos here, and further Oden worshipping here. Of his five baskets, four were dunks, and he also blocked a dunk attempt by Sacramento center Spencer Hawes. For a more detailed analysis of Oden's performance, look no further than Portland's LaMarcus Aldridge: "I'm going on record and saying that Greg is a man-child."

• Elgin Baylor Unceremoniously Tossed Overboard By Clippers. Former Lakers star Elgin Baylor, who was a great shooter, rebounder and passer during his career — therefore leaving him nothing in common with today's players — has stepped down as vice president of basketball operations with the Los Angeles Clippers. And by stepped down we mean resigned amidst some sort of dispute. Mike Dunleavy will assume his responsibilities as general manager. The Clippers issued an 18-word press release; hardly a fitting tribute considering the man spent 22 seasons with the team.

• Captain Ron. Ron Artest's Houston Rockets debut highlighted an otherwise tepid, mistake-prone exhibition opener at the Toyota Center, Houston beating Memphis 96-93. Carl Landry led the Rockets with 18 points, and Artest scored 12 of his 15 points in the first quarter, making three of his five 3-pointers. But he made just one of five shots in the second half and four of 12 overall.

• It's Go Time. Wizards' forward Antawn Jamison wasted little time climbing onto the pain train, leaving their exhibition game with the Mavericks in the first quarter with a right knee injury. Dirk Nowitzki and Brandon Bass each scored 17 points to lead Dallas to a 108-82 win.

• Now who's streakin', bitch? Phoenix won their seventh straight game at the expense of the previously streak-happy Rockets by a score of 122-113. The vaunted Houston defense couldn't do much to stop Amare. Stoudemire scored 30 points thanks to a perfect 20-20 performance from the free throw line. That's 20 points the exciting way!

• Superman forgot how to score. Dwight Howard should dominate every single night, but that is not the case. The physically dominant big man had another lackluster offensive effort, scoring just 11 points on 3-5 from the field and an ugly 5-11 from the line. Atlanta picked up the 98-90 win over Howard's Magic despite not playing Salim Stoudamire. Damn you, Mike Woodson.

• Utah's pretty good as well. The Jazz relied on a balanced offensive attack and timely defense to hold off Atlanta. Josh Smith and his Hawks put up a solid fight, but in the end we saw an excellent home team (14 straight wins) dispatch of a woeful road team (7-20 on the year). The Jazz had seven players score in double figures including Carlos Boozer with 21 points and 12 rebounds. Smith put up 30 and 12, but it was Kyle Korver's free throws in the waning seconds put the game away. Utah won it 100-94.

• He can't feel his face. DeShawn Stevenson hit 4-7 from deep and all four of his fellow Wizards starters scored in double figures. Gerald Wallace sat this one out for the Bobcats because he got KTFO a couple of nights ago by Mikki Moore's sharp elbow. Washington picked up a much needed 110-95 win over Charlotte.

• Salim is God. My boy Salim Stoudamire finally got a little bit of burn and he responded with 18 points in Atlanta's win over the Warriors. The backcourt duo of Baron Davis and Monta Ellis hit up the Hawks for 61 points but the Hawks got the 117-110 victory.

• That's a shitload of bench points. J.R. Smith blew up to the tune of 43 points off of Denver's bench but Chicago's blistering shooting won out in the end. The Bulls, led by Ben Gordon's 37 points (also off of the bench), shot 57% from the field and finished with seven players in double figures. They topped the Nuggets 135-121.

• Everybody's gonna score! Corey Maggette led the Clippers with 31 points, while five of his teammates contributed 10 or more in the Clippers 120-107 win over the Nets. For what it's worth, New Jersey also had six players reach double figures in scoring. Moral victories are fun!

• The one they call Half Man, Half a Season. Tracy McGrady's rust was apparent, but his long-awaited return was a big success in the end. The Houston Rockets defeated their in-state rivals the San Antonio Spurs 83-81. Yao led the way with 21 and 14 while Skip added 16 points to go with 6 assists. Timmy Duncan was stellar with 24 and 17, but aside from Tony and Manu nobody scored more than six points.

• Mama said there'd be days like this. Kevin Durant was slightly less than spectacular in yet another loss for the Sonics. The rookie scored just six points on 3-12 shooting with two rebounds in nearly 25 minutes on the floor. Dallas got the win over Seattle by a score of 111-96 behind 48 points off of the bench.

• Nobody make any sudden movements! Ron Artest returned to the Palace for the second time since the infamous fracas back in his Pacer days. He began the game on the bench along with Mike Bibby and Kevin Martin, but the three combined for 58 points in a win for Sacto. Check out the highlights from this newfangled website here.

• My new favorite sign. I already mentioned Washington's win over the Knicks and I showed you fantastic Fire Isiah sign, but I'd be remiss if I didn't show you the other side of that coin. If you're a fan of an Eastern Conference team (or any NBA team for that matter) other than the Knicks, then you simply have to agree with this guy's sign.

• Roy's Sore Butt Doesn't Stop Blazers. Portland dispatched of Utah despite having to make due without their leader for most of the game. Brandon Roy was forced to the sidelines by his bruised tailbone but Martell Webster and LaMarcus Aldridge were aided by a huge performance from the bench (43 points). The Jazz couldn't take advantage of their weakened opposition, possibly because they were without a starter themselves in Andrei Kirilenko. Deron Williams was efficient but Carlos Boozer was horrendous, the final was 103-89.

• New Orleans Is Boss. Chris Paul took things into his own hands and led the Hornets to a huge 118-113 win over Steve Nash and the Suns. Paul put up a line of 28/10/5 and all four other starters scored at least 19 points each.

• Detroit is untouchable. The Pistons look like the best team in the league on the heels of their 11th straight win, a destruction of the Raptors. They got great performances from their starters and subs alike and outscored the home team by 11 in the fourth quarter. It's early but I'm calling it now, the Pistons are way too deep for the Celtics to handle in a seven game series. Detroit 101 - 85 Toronto

• The Big Three Two. The highest scoring duo of forwards in the NBA is not Nowitzk and Howard, Garnet and Pierce, LeBron and Teamate X. That title belongs to Butler and Jamison. Antawn paced the Wizards with 24 points while Caron contributed 13/7/7 in a drubbing of the beat up Bucks. The win moves Washington back over the .500 mark. Washington 101 - 77 Milwaukee

And now, a look at what happens when people with courtside seats don't pay attention to where they are...

That's why Buckhantz and Chenier are the best in the business!

I love how quickly she gets back to her seat as if it will help to deflect further embarrassment. That's some quality scurrying.

Antawn Jamison Has Perfect Aim

"We'll keep moving in this direction," Thomas said. When asked what direction that would be, he responded, "Me as coach." Happy New Year, Knicks fans.

Thomas then called a closed-door meeting with himself, after which he reported that he may have been fondled.

• Scottie Pippen, Making Friends. How does one lobby for a head coaching job in the NBA? By ridiculing that team's current players, naturally. Scottie Pippen is playing it very wise indeed, on Monday telling the Chicago Tribune that Ben Gordon and Kirk Hinrich shoot too much, among other things. Pippen said that Gordon is "out there shooting for a contract" and that "taking bad shots is a sign of a lack of respect for your teammates. You think I'm going to run back if I know B.J. Armstrong is jacking it up?'' Pippen said, the newspaper reported. ''My shot is just as good as his. That's what players think ... You can't have midgets running your backcourt. Little guards always put you in a vulnerable position."

Still The Coach [New York Post]

Notes on Wednesday's games in the National Basketball Association ...

• Where Have You Gone, Billy Owens? Normally no one would make a huge fuss over an eighth playoff seed, but this is the Warriors, who haven't tasted the post-season since Latrell Sprewell and Chris Gatling were in the lineup (Jud Buechler! Dell Demps!). That was in 1994, when the coach was also Don Nelson (he coached there from 1988-94, then was hired again in 2006). Needing a win (or a Clippers loss) on the last day of the regular season to get in, Stephen Jackson had 31 points and Baron Davis had 12 points, 10 rebounds and 14 assists to lead the visiting Warriors over the Trail Blazers 120-98. Their prize is a first-round matchup with Dallas, which had the NBA's best record this season at 67-15. Nelson, who coached the Mavericks from 1997-2004, has beaten Dallas in five of their past six meetings. So, in this case, first round = fun!

• Anticlimax Theater. The Clippers found out during their game that the Warriors had won, eliminating them from the playoffs. And so Rasual Butler's tie-breaking jumper with 1.5 seconds left gave New Orleans an 86-83 win, sending LA to summer vacation and a spot in the draft lottery. Not so bad, when you think about it.

• Net Dividends. So as it turns out, the Nets draw the Raptors in the first round of the playoffs, and the Bulls get the horns. Er, the Heat. Vince Carter's 24 points, 10 rebounds and nine assists led New Jersey past Chicago 106-97, costing the Bulls the No. 2 seed in the East. The Nets get the No. 6 seed, with the Cavaliers moving up to No. 2.

• Lakers-Suns Rematch On Tap. Meanwhile, the Lakers signed the final papers for their No. 7 seed in the West, which gives them a first-round series with the Suns. LA beat Sacramento 117-104 behind Kobe Bryant's 34 points. Last year, the Suns overcame a 3-1 deficit to knock out Los Angeles in seven games in the opening round. Game 1 of the series will be Sunday in Phoenix. See you there?

Notes on Tuesday's games in the National Basketball Association ...

• Watch As We Write 'Warriors' And 'Playoffs' In The Same Headline! In their most inspiring grab for glory since, well, this, the Warriors are just one win away from an NBA playoff berth. We understand your confusion; the Warriors are never in contention for the playoffs in April, at least since 1995 (top Billboard single: Gangsta's Paradise, Coolio). In its final home game of the regular season, Golden State beat Dallas 111-82, to maintain a one-game lead over the Clippers for the eighth and final playoff berth in the West, with one game to play. The Warriors play tonight in Portland, while the Clippers, who hold the tiebreaker with Golden State, will be at home against New Orleans. The Clippers beat Phoenix 103-99 Tuesday. Of course, Dallas kept Dirk Nowitzki, Josh Howard, Jerry Stackhouse and Erick Dampier out of the meaningless game against the Warriors, while the Suns played their starters against the Clippers. For whatever that's worth. Anyway, big drama tonight, as two perpetually downtrodden organizations vie for a little well-earned respect. If you've got the widescreen, we'll bring the hot wings!

• Jay-Z And The No. 2 Seed. Larry Hughes scored 22 points and LeBron James had 18 points to lead Cleveland to a 98-92 win over Philadelphia 76ers. The Cavaliers can claim the No. 2 seed in the East tonight if they beat Milwaukee and New Jersey beats Chicago (also tonight). Will Nets part-owner Jay-Z give a more stirring pre-game speech than his pal LeBron tonight? We'll see.

• Slokar, Of The Hill People. Sure it was a meaningless game, but without it we never would have been treated to the offensive stylings of Raptors rookie Uros Slokar. Although Toronto lost to Detroit 100-84, Slokar scored 18 points in 30 minutes. He came into the game with 20 career points in 19 games. The Pistons are the Eastern Conference's top seed and the Raptors will be No. 3.

• Sorcery! The Magic beat the Wizards 95-89 Tuesday night, Orlando having a chance to take the No. 7 seed in the Eastern Conference with a victory over Miami, combined with a Washington loss to Indiana, tonight. Hedo Turkoglu scored 26 points to lead the Magic. Washington has lost eight of nine and could finish anywhere from sixth to eighth in the East.

• Rocket Boosters. Yao Ming and Tracy McGrady injury troubles aside, we never could understand why the Rockets aren't up there in the conversation with the Suns, Mavericks and Spurs. Perhaps now they are. Yao is back healthy, and McGrady is playing better than ever; his 39 points leading Houston over Phoenix 120-117 on Monday. Yao had 34 points as the Rockets clinched home court advantage for the first round of the playoffs. Houston will open the playoffs at home against Utah next weekend. Amare Stoudemire scored 30 points for the Suns, who used their starters most of the game even though they had already clinched the No. 2 seed.

• Lincoln Tunnel Series. Are the Nets a playoff factor? Magic Eight Ball sez: Prospects are unclear. Vince Carter had 29 points, 12 rebounds and 10 assists as New Jersey clinched at least the No. 7 seed in the Eastern Conference with a 104-95 win over the Knicks.

• Boozer Time. The Jazz got their act in gear a little too late to wrest first-round home court from the Rockets, beating Portland 130-93 shortly after Houston's win. The Jazz had lost to Phoenix 126-98 on Sunday, earning postgame wrath from team owner Larry Miller. Carlos Boozer led the Jazz with 26 points.

• Other stuff. Oklahoma City SuperSonics? The Seattle SuperSonics have one foot out the door, it seems, after the Washington lawmakers refused to vote on public funding for a proposed $500 million arena in Renton before the Legislature adjourns this weekend. Hopefully they'll work out something before the Key Arena lease runs out in 2010 ... MSNBC's Sam Smith is ready to call the NBA title for the Spurs. Yep. "You haven't heard much about the San Antonio Spurs this season, though you will in a few months when they win their fourth NBA title in the last nine years." Um, even if Joey Crawford is officiating?

• Nicholson Suicide Watch Is Over. The Lakers are in the playoffs. It took 50 points from Kobe Bryant to do it, as Los Angeles beat Seattle 109-98. LA has still lost seven of its past 11.The Lakers have one regular-season game remaining, at Sacramento on Wednesday night, and will finish seventh or eighth in the Western Conference. That means they will face either Dallas or Phoenix in the first round. (Cough).

• Maybe Duncan Can Challenge Him To A Foot Race. That's what we like to see; people getting ejected from a totally meaningless game. San Antonio is already the No. 3 seed in the West, and Dallas is No. 1. Yet this one was an elbow-fest, with Tim Duncan getting two technicals — one for laughing on the bench — as the Mavericks prevailed 91-86. Dirk Nowitzki and Devin Harris each scored 21 points for Dallas, which got win No. 66 (ninth-best in league history). Tony Parker led San Antonio with 23 points, and Duncan had 16 points before being ejected. "He (referee Joey Crawford) looked at me and said, 'Do you want to fight? Do you want to fight?' " Duncan said to the Dallas Morning News. "I didn't say anything to him. If he wants to fight, we can fight. I don't have any problem with him, but we can do it if he wants to."

• Warriors Inch Ahead. Jason Richardson's 32 points and 12 rebounds led the Warriors to perhaps their most significant win since Chris Mullin was playing for them, rather than general managing, as he's doing now. With its 121-108 win over the Timberwolves, Golden State moved a game ahead of the Clippers in the race for the eighth and final playoff spot in the West. The Clippers lost to Sacramento 105-100. Golden State has not been in the playoffs for 12 years. Two games remaining for each, folks.

• A Magic Evening. The Orlando Magic will be in the playoffs. Sunday's 88-86 win over Boston saw to that, as Hedo Turkoglu led the Magic with 20 points.

• LA Story. With the kind of year that Kobe Bryant is having, and with the money they're paying Phil Jackson, could the Lakers actually miss the playoffs? We wouldn't panic if we were Jack Nichiolson, but the Lakers are only 1 games ahead of the Clippers and Warriors in that battle for the final two playoff spots in the West. Corey Maggette scored a career-high 39 points and Elton Brand had 32 points for the Clippers (38-40), to offset Bryant's 50-point effort (his ninth of the season scoring 50 or more) as the Clips won 118-110.

• Cavs Cancel Travel Plans. LeBron James scored 35 points in 36 minutes, as Cleveland secured home-court advantage for the first round of the playoffs with a 94-76 win over the Nets. Cleveland is tied with idle Chicago for the No. 2 seed in the Eastern Conference. The Cavs have three games left.

• No Grant Hill, You Shall Not Steal The Pistons' Thunder. Grant Hill scored 18 points in the first half but was held to four in the second, as Detroit locked up home court advantage in the East with a 104-99 win over Orlando on Wednesday. Hill's 22 points was the most he has scored against Detroit since leaving there in 2000. It was the Pistons' fifth Central Division title in six years. Billups led the Pistons with 28 points and Richard Hamilton had 21. The Magic lead Indiana by one game in the race for the final playoff spot. Meanwhile, until the playoffs start, we're going to watch this video over and over until we overdose on cute. (Thanks, Mighty MJD).

• Rocky Mountain High. Wow, this AI trade thing just may work out after all. The Nuggets won their seven straight, 115-106 over the Jazz, to remain unbeaten in April. Allen Iverson had 22 points and 12 assists, and Carmelo Anthony had 32 points for Denver.

• It's Hard To Find A Word That Rhymes With Sixty. Tim Duncan's 26 points led San Antonio to a 109-100 win over Sacramento, improving the Spurs' record to 57-21 with four games left in the regular season. They've won five straight and 11 of 12, and are a league-best 22-3 since the All-Star Game.

• Controversy On A Sesame Seed Bun. We are sad to report yet another scandal involving the troubled Mayor McCheese administration, as the Chicago Bulls were accused on Tuesday of running up the score against the New York Knicks in order to provide their fans with free Big Macs. The Bulls took control of the game early, eventually winning 98-69. But Chicago took three 3-pointers in the final minute of the game, and Malik Allen missed a layup with 10 seconds left, leading to the piling-on charges. After the game, Nate Robinson, Jerome James and Steve Francis confronted the Bulls' Tyrus Thomas, and James had to be restrained from going after Thomas in the hallway. "I think they were definitely trying to rub it in," said Eddy Curry, who spent his first four seasons with the Bulls. "But we'll see them next year." Fans get free Big Macs if the Bulls score 100 points. "We just wanted to do something for the fans," said Chicago's Chris Duhon. "I don't cook, so I wanted one myself. We certainly didn't mean any disrespect." (We love that quote.) The Bulls are second in the Eastern Conference, at 47-32, leading fifth-place Cleveland by a half-game and Atlantic Division winner Toronto by 1 . Chicago owns the tiebreaker over both teams and has clinched home-court advantage in the first round of the playoffs.

• NOOCH Us To Make Sure We're Awake. And coming up on your left, folks, it's NOOCH, on their way to the playoffs. Wah ...? David West's 33 points led the Hornets 103-100 OT win over the Los Angeles Clippers, bringing New Orleans/Oklahoma City within one game of the eighth and final playoff berth in the Western Conference. Right now Golden State has that spot, with the Clippers a half-game back in ninth.

• Wizard World. The Wizards are in the playoffs! But they still lost on Tuesday, 96-92 to the Nets, having backed in to the postseason by virtue of the 76ers beating the Pacers. Washington has lost five straight, and is without Gilbert Arenas for the rest of the season. But hey, playoffs! (Cough).

• When The Charlotte Bobcats Go Bob Bob Bobbin' Along. It's looking like no home court advantage for you, Miami Heat! With Dwyane Wade still at half speed, Gerald Wallace had 24 points and 10 rebounds to lead the Bobcats to a 92-82 win. The loss left the Heat three games behind idle Toronto with four games remaining in the race for home-court advantage in the first round of the playoffs.

• Honk If You Like The Warriors' Playoff Chances. It's a rivarly as old as the sport of basketball itself: Golden State vs. the Los Angeles Clippers. And this time, it's personal. Actually none of that is true. Sorry. We're just a bit disoriented over the prospect of the Warriors in the playoffs, which now actually might happen. With four games left in the regular season, Golden State inched ahead of the Clippers for the eighth and final playoff berth in the Western Conference, after a 126-102 win over the Jazz on Monday. Stephen Jackson had 28 points for the Warriors (38-40), whose eighth victory in nine home games put them ahead of the Clippers (37-39). For the math inclined, Golden State has a .4872 winning percentage to .4868 for LA. The last time the Warriors were in the playoffs was in 1994. And if you think the Warriors-Clippers traffic jam at the bottom of the playoff standings is bad, how about traffic outside the Oracle Arena on Monday night, where their respective schedules show both the Oakland Athletics and the Warriors with home night games, which ended at about the same time? Both teams use the same parking facilities. Ouch.

• Mint Condition Mavericks. No sooner had the Mavericks clinched home court advantage throughout the playoffs than coach Avery Johnson sealed his two best players in bubble wrap, placed them in the boxes they came in and locked them in a closet. Dirk Nowitzki and Jerry Stackhouse will not be joining the rest of the Dallas team on their final road trip, after the Mavs' 96-86 win over the Clippers on Monday clinched the NBA's best record with five games to go. Nowitzki and Stackhouse scored 26 points and 18 points, respectively.

• Nuggets Poised To Pounce. Could the Nuggets finally be getting hot just before the playoffs? Although only 27-27 since the trade that brought Allen Iverson from the 76ers, Denver won its sixth straight on Monday, 115-111 over the Lakers, as Carmelo Anthony had 33 points and Marcus Camby 22 rebounds and seven blocks. Iverson had 24 points. The Lakers (40-38) haven't beaten a team with a winning record since Utah on Feb. 26.

• The Big Five-Oh. Meanwhile, the Pistons lowered their magic number (magic numbers in basketball!) to clinch the top seed in the Eastern Conference playoffs to one, after a 91-83 win over the Knicks. Chauncey Billups scored 22 points as Detroit got its 50th win of the season.

• The Bell Curve. In a format in which more than 50 percent of teams make the playoffs, is it conceivable that the Lakers will fail to make the cut? The Clippers trail the Lakers by 1 1/2 games for the eighth and final spot in the West (by one in the loss column). The Lakers have five games remaining; one against the Clippers. On Sunday, Raja Bell was 6-of-6 from 3-point range and had 22 points in the Suns' 115-107 win over the Lakers. Bell, of course, was 0-for-10 on 3s on Saturday against the Hornets. Kobe Bryant had 34 points.

• It's Iguodala Time. Your 76ers update: Four games behind the Magic for the final playoff berth, with six games to play. Andre Iguodala, 25 points in a 109-104 overtime win over the Hawks.

• Wade Is Back. Dwyane Wade came back from a 6 1/2-week layoff (12 points in 27 minutes), but it didn't help the Heat in a 111-103 OT loss to Charlotte, which got 30 points from Gerald Wallace.

• This Is Our Countrrryyyyy. Sure we've taken our lumps lately. But don't ever let anyone knock the USA; this is still a great nation ... a land where they deliver your Pistons playoff tickets right to your front door, complete with a side helping of optimism. On Sunday the Pistons held LeBron James to 20 points on 5-of-16 shooting in an 87-82 victory. Richard Hamilton scored 21 points for Detroit.

• They're Hot, Baby. On Jan. 27, the Miami Heat were 19-25, just a chalk outline on the sidewalk, really. Not only did their two stars miss significant time due to injuries, but so did their coach, for Pete's sake. Cut to Thursday, as Antoine Walker and Shaquille O'Neal scored 20 points each in a 94-90 win over Cleveland, helping the Heat clinch a berth in the Eastern Conference playoffs. Miami moved 1 1/2 games ahead of Washington in the Southeast Division, and, uh, we don't like the Wiz chances of catching back up.

• To Catch The Sun. They way things began, no way did we think the Spurs would catch the Suns for the No. 2 seed in the West. But look! Over there! (No, not the curtains ... over there). Tony Parker scored a season-high 35 points to lead San Antonio over Phoenix 92-85, bringing the Spurs to within two games of Phoenix for second place in the West. Steve Nash led the Suns with 20 points.

• Zero Tolerance. As you may have heard, Gilbert Arenas' knee surgery has ended his season. Arenas was diagnosed with a lateral meniscus tear and had arthroscopic surgery at Sibley Memorial Hospital in Washington. He was injured in the first quarter of Wednesday night's 108-100 loss to the Charlotte Bobcats. He could be back, though, should the Wizards make the NBA Finals, which we could absolutely see happening now.