new-england-revolution Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lionel Messi coming to MLS has had the effect you’d think
One of the bonuses for both MLS and Apple TV having an exclusive streaming deal is that they’re not forced to tell us how it’s going. Or they can decide what they want to say. Without usual ratings to gauge how the revolutionary deal is fairing, we’re usually left guessing. There were whispers that ...

So what will MLS do about its TV ratings?
When setting up for the current MLS season, which started the last weekend of February, one of the major themes was the league locking in its new TV deal sometime in March. MLS’s TV deal has been paltry when compared to the other sports leagues ($90m a year), and there was a feeling that while the n...

MLS is just silly, and it loves it, apparently
The MLS playoffs concluded their second round last night, with some of its trademark goofiness. And in true nothing-means-anything fashion of the whole league, both No. 1 seeds failed to win a game....

The New England Revs are going to set the league points record, and they’re not going to play any defense to do it
While MLS still has its fair share of issues, the one thing you have to give it credit for is that during the regular season, the league rewards teams that just say, “Fuck it, it’s free cake.” They don’t generally live on in history, because wonky defensive teams get found out by the extremely callo...

Zlatan Assists Zlatan For A Typically Stupendous Zlatan Bicycle Kick Goal
Zlatan Ibrahimović has been consistently Zlataning since coming to MLS, scoring 32 goals in 38 games, but it’s been a while since his last truly memorable Zlatan moment. Possibly in recognition of this relative drought, Zlatan pulled off a spectacular Zlatan on Sunday, with a Zlatan-y sequence of sk...

Columbus Crew Trade Away Top Scorer Following Dumb Penalty-Kick Beef
Now, I don’t know much about MLS, but trading your top scorer coming off a season where he tied the league lead for most goals all because he got into an argument about who would take a penalty in what should’ve been a blow-out seems really, really weird to me. And yet these appear to be the facts o...

Jermaine Jones Gets Red Card, Attacks Referee
Jermaine Jones, German-born USMNTer currently in MLS to get some checks and play whatever position he wants, has a history of getting heated and falling ass first into some stupid red cards. Back at Schalke, he got suspended for two months for stomping on Marco Reus’s foot....

Damn, Even We Have To Admit That This Seattle Sounders Goal Is A Beauty
You know how we feel about MLS, but still, even we can't front on a team goal of this quality. This is a textbook three man weave the likes of which you'd be happy to pull off in training, let alone a match. Pure class. Bravo, Sounders....

Landon Donovan Retires A Champion; Galaxy Win 2-1 In Extra Time
Robbie Keane's goal in the 111th minute gave the LA Galaxy a 2-1 lead over the New England Revolution en route to their fifth MLS Cup, and third in four years. Keane's cartwheel/somersault/finger gun celebration was impeccable....

MLS Used A Blind Draw To Decide Where Jermaine Jones Will Play
In one of those "only in MLS" stories—and not one of the charming ones, either—World Cup standout Jermaine Jones is now a member of the New England Revolution, but only because the Revs' name came up in a random draw....

This Long-Range Volley Might Win MLS Goal Of The Year
The Houston Dynamo visited the New England Revolution yesterday in MLS play. Houston won 2-1, which is fine, but what's really worth talking about is this filthy, filthy 25-yard volley from midfielder Adam Moffat to give the Dynamo the 1-0 lead....

This Week In Guys Losing Their Lunch On The Soccer Pitch
It has been an unfortunate week for gentlemen suffering gastrointestinal distress on the soccer pitch, as at least two professional stars displayed their athletic acumen—and their lunch—before what we assume was a grossed-out television audience....

An Entire Section Of DC United Fans Planked At Last Night's Game
Well, planking just won't die. We thought it had, over the weekend. But maybe soccer fans based in DC don't watch morning news in Dallas....

Trouser Snakes On A Plane
Remember that scene in Airplane where everyone starts freaking out that the pilots are sick and then, pow, some topless chick runs right in front of the camera? That was the first time I ever saw an unclothed pair of boobies in cinema ... while watching it with my parents. They didn't realize that w...

Patriots. Red Sox. Boston College. You just can't stop ANY of them. As if Massachusetts sports fans didn't have enough to tout, New England Revolution midfielder Michael Parkhurst scored his first career goal ... from midfield. Here's video proof that Jesus is simply engrossed in a month-long chowde...