It's a strategy bound to be adopted by countless other obscure, aspiring Olympians, and it's a wonder no one else has become a pimp owner of an escort agency to scale the podium as a medalist. Campbell, however, insists that he's not like his counterparts — you know, the other guys who run prostitution rings.

"When people think of a pimp they think of a guy standing around on a street corner with gold chains. Pimps are more tough-type guys. I'm an owner of an escort agency," he said.

He added that he and his business partner, Hugo Phillips, 20, employed only "smart, attractive" girls. "We don't treat them like pieces of meat." His parents were supportive, he added. "Mum was hesitant but she met the girls, a couple came over to her house and she was sweet-as.

Well then! If mum is sweet-as, why aren't New Zealand's Olympic handlers gung-ho about the idea? Prostitution, after all, is perfectly legal in Kiwiland, but Campbell's risque business might cost him a spot in the country's London delegation because of that oft-cited trope of being an example for the country's youths.

Still, Campbell is teaching the kids a fine lesson, so listen up: Embrace innovation, not whores.

NZ athlete funds 2012 bid with brothel [Times Online]
Olympic hopeful opens brothel to pay for training [CNN]

Yes, the 19th annual hunt in the Central Otago portion of New Zealand drew 460 shooters, separated into 39 teams whose sole purpose is to kill as many rabbits as possible. The winning team was the "Cuniculus Terminators" whose 12-man team blasted 978 cuddly little bunnies over Easter weekend. And bunnies weren't the only things taken out by the marauding hordes of gun-wielding Kiwis. Nope, the total tally included "hares, stoats, ferrets, goats, possums, turkeys and the odd feral cat."

Women and older children joined in, as did the Central Ostago boy scouts, even if they weren't allowed to shoot anything.

Local scouts also benefitted, being commissioned by the Lions to pick up all the dead rabbits and dispose of them in a purpose-dug pit.

Personally, I feel like my Easter Sundays spent finding colored eggs in various pairs of shoes are completely wimpy compared to this.

Terminators top in Easter bunny hunt [Otago Daily Times]

Original PHOTO: By Rosie Manins, Otago Daily Times

*taps foot patiently*

On the day that he was assigned to write that article, I'm guessing that Lester Haines had a pretty good day at work. No less than three cock puns appear in the article, and anytime you can get paid to make cock puns, well, that's a good day.

The gist, if you were too lazy to click the link, is that New Zealand has named their national badminton team the "Black Cocks." Now, they're considering changing it, because the International Badminton Federation doesn't like it. I guess they weren't able to look into the future and predict that any controversy might arise from the term "Black Cocks."

If they think they have problems, they should try doing a Google image search for a picture to use with a post like this.

NZ finds Black Cocks hard to swallow [The Register]

That is the Haka of the All Blacks, New Zealand's national rugby team. I don't know how the Australians fared on that particular day, but if I played on an opposing team, and I saw those guys doing that dance, I would run like hell in the opposite direction while screaming about my plans for immediate retirement.

We still have much to learn in America about intimidation.

Haka of the All Blacks [Wikipedia]