As most of you know, today is my last day writing for Deadspin. Thanks to everyone for putting up with my NBA Closers, weekend nonsense and drunken Nightmare Ant posts over the last couple of months. I sincerely appreciate all the best wishes I've read in the comments and received via e-mail. Truth. I'm going to print them out and roll around in 'em ... naked.

Of course, I also want to thank Will for trusting me with the Gawker log-in info — password: hankypankiel — and allowing me write whatever the hell my cold, little Canadian heart desired. I really can't thank him enough for this opportunity, though I'll try hard if I ever meet the guy. (Sager bombs and karaoke!)

And with that hurried "goodbye," I'm done. Take care, everyone, and you'll be hearing from me around these here Internets soon enough. Bye!

Named after revolutionary war general 'Mad Anthony' Wayne, for whom Wayne County, Michigan is also named, 'Nightmare Ant' — or 'Mad Ant' as he's known in some circles — is all fucking business. He enjoys weight lifting; crashing picnics; and making you piss your bed.

He "pretends" to be the official mascot for the Pistons and Pacers' developmental league team: the Fort Wayne Mad Ants, but it's all just a front. 'Nightmare Ant' is Deadspin. He is your overlord. Sleep tight, kids.

(Um, I have no idea what's going on here. I'm just gonna stop. Enjoy your Saturday night.)