Joe Paterno's New Eyewear: Eyes

The 83-year-old Penn State coach had eye surgery which helps him "read his watch" and "not have to wear glasses" anymore but he should, because without them, he looks old and scary. [FightOnState] » 2/12/10 9:20am 2/12/10 9:20am

Bobby Bowden Acts His Age, Forgets Score

Bowden may not remember what happened two quarters ago, but he remembers when FSU was good. That used to be enough for boosters, but after a mental lapse quite in character with an octogenarian, who knows. » 11/11/09 2:30am 11/11/09 2:30am

Jim Calhoun Is Unbreakable

12 miles into his charity bike race for cancer research, UConn's 67-year-old head coach hit a pot hole, fell, and broke five ribs. After he crossed the finish line, he fainted from dehydration and was hospitalized. Out today, though. [NYDN] » 6/14/09 9:45am 6/14/09 9:45am

He's Just Your Average Octogenarian Bodybuilder Who Will Not Die

Hmm. Yes, I guess this could technically be categorized as "Nightmare Fuel" but at the same time, there is something comforting in the fact that 80-year-old bodybuilders like Ray Moon do exist. Actually, not all. These men should only exist in the darkest corners of a mescaline-ravaged mind or a Guillermo Del Toro… » 9/18/08 6:45pm 9/18/08 6:45pm

Bill Conlin's Sensitivity Once Again Called Into Question

Bill Conlin, Philadelphia Daily News columnist, surf enthusiast, and, well, Deadspin contributor, has been suspended from his television stint on Philly Comcast's Daily News Live show (pretty much Philly's version of ESPN) pending further review, after he made some comments on air that some viewers found "insensitive." » 6/12/08 10:40am 6/12/08 10:40am

People Not Quite Old Enough To Remember The Last Cubs' Title

Forgive us the doubling-up on Cubs stuff today, but we just can't help ourselves: A new story in — of course — AARP Magazine chronicles the plight of old people just trying to stay alive long enough to see a Cubs World Series win. (Via wrigleyville23.) Our suggestion is to look into cryogenics. » 5/13/08 5:01pm 5/13/08 5:01pm

Goodbye, Shaun Alexander

Seahawks running back Shaun Alexander has joined the growing segment of unemployed rich guys. It's amazing that a couple of years ago, he was a top five fantasy pick just and a league MVP. But the foot, man, the foot is not well. And some of the Seattle faithful are happy he's gone. Like porny-named Tumwater resident… » 4/23/08 3:30pm 4/23/08 3:30pm

ESPN Insists You Watch Them Torture Miguel Tejada

Tonight at 7 p.m. ET, ESPN's E:60 unleashes its orchestrated ambush of Miguel Tejada in all of its uncomfortable, Schapp'd-up glory. They couldn't sit on the story long enough because, well, a 33-year-old man posing as a 31-year-old is something that needs to be revealed as soon as possible so that the public can no… » 4/22/08 6:45pm 4/22/08 6:45pm

Lute Olson's Back And Surly Like A Fox

The University of Arizona has its long-standing head basketball coach back on the bench, but he apparently upped his prickliness quotient during his season-long leave of absence . First order of business? Fire the guy who kept the ship afloat while you were gone. Kevin O'Neill, who was at one point penciled in as… » 4/02/08 6:30pm 4/02/08 6:30pm

The Favre Retirement Snafu Mystery

So, honestly, what in the name of fucking Florio happened today with the very brief, yet very public screw-up regarding Brett Favre's retirement? About an hour ago, the Packers PR monkeys fessed up to the whole situation, telling Dennis Dillon at The Sporting News that, "The people who handle our website… » 2/28/08 4:45pm 2/28/08 4:45pm

It's Important That You Know Bill Conlin's Compensation

We had a lot of fun with crotchety old Bill Conlin on Friday, but we had no idea how serious he was about this email business. Apparently, he's been firing off angry emails to random readers for weeks now. » 11/26/07 5:05pm 11/26/07 5:05pm