Deadspin: on the dl

Josh Elliott Reveals What Makes A Giant Man With Uncooperative Hair Get Up So Early Everyday

DAULERIO — Fri, 01 May 2009 17:25:01 EDT

ESPN's resident morning sports centrist, blog buzzologist, speaks candidly about sports media, some of his colleagues in Bristol, and even the odd fascination with Hannah Storm's wardrobe. [On The DL]

Tony Kornheiser Talks About His Future At ESPN

DAULERIO — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 13:45:04 EST

"I don't make enough money that they have to worry about getting rid of me. They can do it if they want to. I hope they choose to retain me." [HappyBirthdayDanLevy]

From the Department of Blind Items

Leitch — Fri, 29 Dec 2006 14:57:11 EST

Hmm...

Which married journeyman pitcher tries to make up for his lack of height and size in other fun ways? He claims to be 5' 10 but in reality is no taller than at least 5'6, apparently prefers blowjobs to all other forms of sex and regularly offers his "services" to just about every woman whom he encounters. He even went as far as to approach the long-term girlfriend of a teammate. Within minutes of her boyfriend leaving the room he gazed deeply into her eyes and uttered the phrase that every girl longs to hear... "God, I'd love to eat you out right now." It seems that his wife is simply "not into that kind of thing" so the poor guy is forced to put his skills to work on other women.
The teammate's girlfriend was somehow able to stop swooning long enough to decline the offer. However, another lady, who knows him a bit more intimately, confirms his claim of prowess in that particular department but observed "he has to be good with his tongue because the rest of his body is in proportion to his height."

Downtown [OnTheDL]

It's Fun When Baseball Players Type

Leitch — Wed, 25 Jan 2006 16:45:45 EST

The great minds and pure souls at On The DL only update once a week or so, but when they do, you can pretty much guarantee it will be a doozy. Today's post unveils a secret computer IM conversation between a major league player and one of his "fans", and it's a little dirtier than even we like to get into around these parts. An excerpt:

mlbguy06: i wanna c— in every hole you have ;-)
luv2party: oooh baby i cant wait!!! i bet ur even better than [name of player deleted]
mlbguy06: and he was good
mlbguy06: maybe you could get him over for a threesome ;-)
luv2party: LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u would want a threesome with [name of player deleted]?!

The On The DL girls don't give any hints as to the identity of the player, but based on the syntax, grammar and literary style, we think it's pretty obvious that it's David Eckstein.

Computer Love [On The DL]

(Warning: Transcript is EXTREMELY ribald. Make sure your boss isn't standing behind you. Or your mom. Or anyone, really.)

Kenny Rogers' Special Friend

Leitch — Thu, 29 Dec 2005 16:45:16 EST

Our old, dear friends at On The DL — whom will always be our best friends, because they've been nice to us from the beginning — have uncovered some excellent photos of new Tigers pitcher Kenny Rogers out on the town with a lady who does not particularly resemble Mrs. Rogers. The photos — there's another one, from a camera phone, on the site — were sent to the On The DL ladies by the woman herself.

Of course, right after they were taken, Rogers just decked the photographer anyway.

Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood [On The DL]