Skyline Figures You'd Like Blue Noodles Under Your Diarrhea Sludge

Would you get a load of that horror. I mean lean on in here and get a nice big load of it. That is a pair of tubs of pasta, dyed red and blue by Louisville's Skyline Chili locations as a... what? celebration? like hell! ...of the upcoming Louisville-Kentucky Sweet 16 matchup. Because Skyline Chili figures that if you… » 3/25/14 5:40pm 3/25/14 5:40pm

How To Make Linguine With Clams And Bid Farewell To This Goddamn Winter

Groundhog meteorologists notwithstanding, seasons are shapeless, poorly defined things. To wit: Traditionally, in North America, the "winter" season is regarded as beginning at some point in the back half of December (the solstice) and extending into the back half of the following March (the equinox)—and yet, somehow,… » 3/15/14 1:00pm 3/15/14 1:00pm

How To Make A Ragù, Which Has Nothing To Do With Jars

By now you're likely well aware that the word ragù—although perhaps most frequently encountered with its accent symbol flipped over, emblazoned across ten thousand jars of tomato products in your local supermarket—has its own non-commercial definition, other than "bad-tasting Italian-themed ketchup." » 12/21/13 1:30pm 12/21/13 1:30pm

Can I Cook Italian Food For Italian Guests?

» 12/10/13 3:15pm 12/10/13 3:15pm

Welcome to the Feedbag, where all the dumb questions about food, drink, cooking, eating, and accidental finger removal you've been embarrassed to ask can finally receive the berating they goddamn deserve. Also: answers. Send all your even-vaguely-food-related questions to albertburneko@gmail.com with the subject… » 12/10/13 3:15pm 12/10/13 3:15pm

How To Make A Lasagna And Prepare For Hibernation

Time was, as summer rounded into autumn, you kept an eye out for that first cool, dry weekend after the leaves started to turn, when the air remained genuinely chilly in the shade all day long, and then you tilted back your floppy coppola hat, hooked your thumbs into your suspenders, gazed thoughtfully into the middle… » 10/05/13 1:00pm 10/05/13 1:00pm

Two Ways To Make Alfredo Sauce So Rich It'll Stop Your Heart

So you've decided to end your life, or at least the segment of your life during which you could walk from here to there without your chest making sounds like a whirring blender full of silverware. Because that is the only conceivable reason why you would choose to make Alfredo sauce, which, scientifically speaking, is… » 6/22/13 1:23pm 6/22/13 1:23pm

How To Make Shrimp Linguine: A Guide For Lovers

Look. Wonderful as these foodstuffs are, it's not all pot roasts and chili and disturbingly alien holiday candies out there in the world of eating; nor should it be in your kitchen. Sometimes you're not looking to spend all day slow-cooking some large quantity of rich, meaty food to serve to a lot of people. Sometimes… » 1/05/13 2:00pm 1/05/13 2:00pm