By sheer coincidence, athletes from three different teams in three different places hung out with penguins today. But we need to know: Who was the best?
Sidney Crosby renewed his driver's license at the DMV this week. Unlike all of the rest of us, he didn't have to wait, thanks to Pennsylvania state policy. GET ANGRY (or don't because this policy actually makes sense).
It took 28 seconds for the Bruins to score first in Game 2 of the Eastern Conference finals. It took even less time than that for Sidney Crosby and the Penguins to shit their pants.
HBO will film the Capitals and Penguins this December for a four-episode Hard Knocks-esque miniseries. Will there be Ryanian pottymouthage? "You might hear some salty language with a little Canadian or Russian flair," said a network exec. моргала выколю, падла!
Tim Gorman, a correspondent for the Boston Globe (read: unemployed writer), decided to conduct a social experiment and run the Boston Marathon dressed as a Yankees fan. This could have ended very badly, but didn't, thank heavens. There was this, however: