Pete was in Houston doing a radio interview, because that's where he and his as-yet-unnamed girlfriend met with a Playboy talent scout. But lest you think the young lass is nothing more than a pair of freakish fake breasts,

[M]y girl's a real educated girl - she graduated from Arizona State. She had a very prestigious job several years ago when she was a flight attendant for Korean Airlines, which is really a big deal in Korea, and she's Korean."

Pete also laid the sole blame for his ban on Bud Selig, but let's be honest. You only clicked on this post to make that photo bigger. You haven't read this far down.

Pete Rose Goes To Bat For His Lady! [Sports Radio Interviews]

Reader Ward writes:

"I was in Vegas with some buddies last weekend [Halloween Weekend] and we saw this guy and his buddy playing craps at Caesars. This guys was pretty strong with the dice and we all won a bunch of $ off his throws. Later I saw him at the sports book placing a World Series bet. I thought the image was a classic."

Makes sense. I mean, you wouldn't go to the stadium without wearing the jersey of your favorite player, right? So why would you to Vegas without honoring and drawing inspiration from the legendary gamblers of our time? Unless this is actually Pete Rose Jr., in which case it's just sad.

I wonder if he apologized in advance for betting on baseball.

* * * * *

Has anything good ever happened on a Tuesday? Let's try to change that.

The lesson of every statistics class is the same: all statistics are skewed. (Right, Mr. Alex?) That seems like it would hold true for a text message poll about reinstating Pete Rose during last night's Dodgers-Reds affair, but then, I guess it is possible for 100 percent of voters to believe in the sanctity of second chances — to have pity on Charlie Hustle, to absorb everything Joe Posnanski has ever written about the Reds, to uphold the values of democracy and the republic and organized religion, all with a few thumb clacks on the T9 or QWERTY keyboard.

Or CarMax got screwed out of a fair and decent poll, and no one really thinks Rose should be reinstated.

I'm not sure which to believe, just as I'm utterly baffled by the curious choice of headshots. Is one supposed to make Rose look like a criminal? Did he acquire his white suit from Rick Pitino? And why is Rose smiling like he's just made some money on this poll's results? Heads I win, tails you lose.

*****

Well, hello! Coming atcha today from Durham, N.C., where no one within 100 yards of me is awake.

Pete Rose popped up at the Reds/Padres game last night sporting some snazzy sunglasses and a young lady on his arm who may or may not be his special lady friend he's adopted to help his fruitless Hall of Fame campaign. Hey, at this point, he has to try anything.

(Thanks to reader Eric C. for the screengrabs.)

*****

Good morning. It's Thursday. I think I'm still drunk.

The biggest voice—and the one that is possibly the most directly affected—is Hank Aaron's. He was widely quoted this weekend for saying that anyone who has been proven to use steroids should be banned from the Hall of Fame. That would conveniently eliminate both the man who broke his biggest record (Barry Bonds) and the man most likely to break it in the future (Alex Rodriguez) ... but not Mark McGwire, who is currently being "banned" anyway. He also wants the 102 names from the infamous list of 2003 released, as if that would solve anything.

"My feeling has always been the same – the game of baseball has no place for cheaters," Aaron said Sunday morning. "There's no place in the Hall of Fame for people who cheat."

He's right cheating is bad. But is using steroids really cheating? Let's ask another current Hall of Famer:

"I certainly don't think you can stand up there and hit a Nolan Ryan 100-mph fastball just because you put something in your arm or took a pill," he said.

Oh, wait ... that was Hank Aaron again. But at the same time, Aaron has no problem with Pete Rose joining the club. In the same impromptu press conference, Aaron said that Rose belongs in Cooperstown and he would like to seem him there. He says that Pete's situation is different than the steroids question. (It is. It's worse.) But if Pete would just ask for forgiveness and admits his faults, this could all be over.

There's the rub, isn't it? Pete Rose doesn't want forgiveness and will never say he's sorry. That's always been part of the "conditions" for the removal of his lifetime ban and that's why it hasn't happened yet. Even if Pete does get the ban lifted, he would be relying on the Veteran's Committee to get him into Cooperstown, which is not a lock. Aaron and two prominent former teammates of Rose (guess who?) have been lobbying Selig on his behalf, but there are just as many Hall members who want to see Rose humbled first. Maybe he broke one of their records?

If there's one thing that induction weekend never fails to reminds us of, it's that there is no more arrogant group of people on the planet than Baseball's Hall of Famers. (Except maybe the baseball writers who put them there.) If you think Rickey Henderson is the new king of that mountain, you're sadly mistaken. (See also: Reggie Jackson.)

MLB commissioner Bud Selig mulling pardon for hit king Pete Rose [NY Daily News]
Aaron wants past steroid users exposed, banned from Hall [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]
MLB: Aaron says Rose belongs in Hall [Honolulu Advertiser]
Rickey has last laugh [Daily Star]

-Antoine Walker joins the NBA All-Star team of gambling deadbeats, alongside Charles Barkley, Alonzo Mourning and Michael Jor[REDACTED BY EDICT OF CZAR STERN] At least Walker tried to pay off his debts. Too bad the checks bounced.

-Pedro Martinez signs with the Phillies, anticlimactically ending his courtship. Also sure to be anticlimactic Pedro's return to the bigs.

-Meanwhile, Los Angeles has taken their offer to Lamar Odom off the table. Gamesmanship? Or, with the cap coming down, can the Lakers simply not afford to pay $9 mil to a fourth option who's running out of potential to live up to?

-To afford to offer Paul Millsap a contract, the Jazz will have to take out a bank loan. Why again did we think Salt Lake City could support a professional sports team?

-MMA poster girl Gina Carano's ex says there's a sex tape. He also says he's "smashed a lot finer than that." Classy.

-Bud Selig says Pete Rose's HOF eligibility is "under review." He declined to set odds for the prop.

-Tony Romo lost a girlfriend, but gained a sense of humor. Does this make you like him more? Didn't think so.

-Because no one believes that Prince Fielder is a vegetarian, here's a list of the 50 fattest MLB players of all time. Starting with Prince's daddy.

It's long been conventional wisdom that Fosse's promising career was ruined by the ridiculous home plate collision that won the game for the National League, but left Fosse with a dislocated shoulder. He was a star on the rise and a great hope for the Cleveland Indians, hitting 16 home runs in what was essentially his rookie year, making the All-Star team and eventually winning a Gold Glove. Sadly, just a few short years later he was a washed-up platoon player struggling to crack the Mendoza Line—and it could all be traced back to that collision with noted jerk Peter Edward Rose.

Except that's not exactly what happened. Yes, Fosse was hurt, but he never went on the disabled list and played 42 games in the second half. (As Rose loves to remind people, he missed three games with a bruised knee.) Playing hurt, there was a noticeable dip in his power, but the next season he went to the All-Star Game again and won his second Gold Glove. His average began to tail off the next two years (72-73), but he was still a full-time starter and a more than serviceable catcher for three full seasons after the original hit.

Fosse's career really went into a tailspin in 1974, after he had been traded to the Oakland Athletics. On June 5, Reggie Jackson, as was his wont, started a clubhouse brawl with teammate Billy North. Fosse attempted to break up the fight—and broke his neck in the process. He missed the remainder of that year, struggled mightily through the next three seasons and was done with baseball by 1977. That was the injury he never recovered from.

The argument could be made that without the shoulder injury, Fosse's home runs don't decline, he's never traded to Oakland, the Indians break their World Series curse, and their superstar catcher goes to the Hall of Fame. And since his injury did happen in an All-Star Game (before it counted!) it feels especially pointless and stupid. But wasn't Reggie Jackson's behavior even more stupid? Isn't he at least as responsible for ruining Fosse's career as Rose was? Why doesn't he catch more grief? (Or the team doctors who let Fosse play hurt?) Unfortunately, we don't have footage of that fight and it isn't replayed every July to reminds us, so Rose remains the villain on this one.

On second thought ...

... what a complete jackass. It is all his fault.

Ghosts of Prospects Past: Ray Fosse [Indians Prospect Insider]
July 14, 1970: Rose crashes into Fosse in dramatic All-Star finish [Cincy Enquirer]
Bowled Over / A collision with Pete Rose in the 1970 All-Star Game changed Ray Fosse's career [SF Chronicle]

Las Vegas golf-course developer, Ken Jowdy, is accused of taking more than $25 million from investors to build a resort in Mexico, only instead of actually building anything, they guy just spent the money on parties for him and his friends. Oh, and his friends are Joe Morgan, Roger Clemens, Reggie Jackson and Pete Rose.

The losers in this scenario included many ex-Rangers, Islanders and Devils including Bryan Berard, Michael Peca, Mattias Norstrom, Chris Simon, Steve Rucchin, and Rem Murray, and current Cup carrier Sergei Gonchar. The winners? The friends who got six-figure no-show construction jobs and anyone who likes to stick stuff in Roger Clemens' ass. According to the lawsuit, Jowdy gave Brian McNamee a job as a personal trainer and put "a Clemens gal pal named Adrian Moore, described as a 'regular party attendee who was close to Clemens,' on his payroll 'as a personal favor'" to the Rocket. (That's New York Post-speak for "they were doing it.")

Other winners included the "porn stars, escorts, strippers [and] party girls" who were flown for the lavish "bacchanalian revelry" that Jowdy used to woo his baseball party pals. The hockey goons weren't invited.

From one angle it makes sense: If you want to throw crazy sex parties to impress your famous "friends," you can't be stealing from those friends. So you have to target a different group of gullible millionaires to finance your orgies with the first group. On the other hand, if you're going to steal money from rich athletes, why would you go after NHL players? You don't see jewel thieves breaking into trailer parks, do you?

Plus, why would anyone want to impress Joe Morgan? (For the record, Joe says: "It's unethical to use my name when I never went to any of those parties, nor was I involved in any other activities." (His name came up in the lawsuit, but so noted.)

According to the filings, Jowdy lavished attention on the baseball players "under the guise that these individuals would eventually purchase real estate" in the planned resorts, called Diamante Del Mar and Diamante Cabo San Lucas. But, the ex-major leaguers never expressed any interest, according to the suit.

Specifically, the suit states, "Clemens and even his wife were vocal and adamant that they would never purchase" the property.

"Nevertheless, Jowdy continued to provide - and these individuals all continued to accept - gratuitous, extravagant private air travel, five-star hotel accommodations, luxury home rentals, unlimited food and beverage expenses, golf tournaments and lavish parties several times a year over a three-year period," the suits allege.

Baseball players: "We may not like you, but we'll take your free stuff."

NHLers: Our Cash Was Blown on MLB Porn Party [TMZ]
GOLF RESORT DEVELOPER BILKED NHL STARS: SUIT [New York Post]

See if you can cut through this wall of logic. Rose was on the Dan Patrick Show today and he explained why he thinks steroids are despicable. They affect records and records are sacred. (He's the hit king, so he should know.) They're illegal (he knows about that too) and they destroy the integrity of the game. (Yes, he actually used the word "integrity.") Most importantly, none of those things would apply to a manager who might have placed a friendly wager on his own team. I mean, how could a manager possibly have an influence on "the direct outcome" of a baseball game?

So that means he doesn't think Alex Rodriguez—an admitted PED user—should be allowed in the Hall of Fame, right? Whoa, whoa, whoa ... let's not be hasty here! He did still hit all those home runs. And you can't take away Barry Bonds' "sacred" home run record, just because he might have done something not good to get there. Rose says he would back A-Rod's candidacy for the Hall of Fame, even if he did do something far, far worse than betting on baseball.

Doesn't every man deserves a second chance?

Pete Rose Talks Roids, A-Rod Pitch Tipping, and Hit Streaks to Dan Patrick [Sports Radio Interviews]
Pete Rose: A-Rod shouldn't get cheated out of Hall of Fame [New York Daily News]
Pete Rose says Alex Rodriguez deserves to be in Hall of Fame [ESPN]

Wonder if Paul Giamatti owns one of these?

Okay, this stifling Monday is finally done. Give your parents a call tonight. They miss you.

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin.

Museum Clones Warhol's "Rose" [AnimalNY]

Because when Pete Rose talks, everyone listens.

"It was a complete embarrassment," said Staff Sgt. Steven Tischer, commander of the Colerain-Highland Ridge U.S. Army Recruiting Station that sponsored the baseball camp for 7- to 14-year-olds. "You don't swear in front of kids, that's just common sense. He dropped the F-bomb and the S-bomb. He told them winning is everything and if you get second place you're just losers."

"His comment that he was (bleeped) off that Marge [Schott] didn't leave him any money in her will and that she left it all to the zoo. His comment about how Marge loved to smoke and she would have smoked in her sleep if someone was there to hold her cigarette all night. His comment that he saw Joe DiMaggio in the shower and he saw more of him than Marilyn Monroe ever did. His comment on a good friend of his that was a gambler - and how I could go on."

Pete Rose ranting about Joe DiMaggio in the shower to a baseball camp. We think we might like hire him and just have him follow us around, commenting on our daily life. Everyone should have a Pete Rose as a friend.

Potty-Mouth Pete Strikes Out At Camp For Kids [Cincinnati Enquirer]

You can guy a piece of 30-year-old chewed gum straight from the mouth of Pete Rose. Amazingly, it's not actually Pete who's selling it, though this probably gonna give him some ideas.

you are bidding on a ONE OF A KIND lot!!! All the items for one price! First you will receive a piece of chewing gum thrown by Pete in disgust after a strikeout in a loss to the St. Louis Cardinals on 8/31/1975. The gum was thrown toward the dugout and stuck to the top wall where it was retrieved by my grandfather and stored for over 30 years. The gum is as hard as a rock but in original chewed condition.

It occurs to us that this piece of gum is exactly 40 days older than we are.

Pete Rose Game Used Chewed Gum [eBay] (via The Lefty)

The answers go from Dan Marino to Andy Pettite to Joe Namath to Pete Rose, who once tried to put his mack down on Lady Andrea's mom. Actually, I'm not sure that's the right term ... he sort of offered to pay her for sex. I guess Pete Rose kind of implied that Lady Andrea's mom was a whore. Which is unfortunate, because she probably isn't.

As for my mom, she was into John Elway (eh), Joe Theismann (which makes me want to take her Mother's Day gift back), and now that I think about it, she kind of had an odd thing for Rickey Henderson, too (AWESOME). Man, if things had worked out differently, I could be calling Rickey Henderson dad ... of course, he'd still be calling himself Rickey. But that's just the complex kind of relationship we'd have.

Mother's Day Potpourri - Your Mom Loves Hot Athletes Too [Ladies...]

His admission of nightly betting came up only because, before he came on the air with us, I had repeated the standard history of his gambling while Reds' manager: that he never bet against his own team, but that he often didn't bet at all on their games. This, to me, was as great a transgression as the gambling itself, because it left open the prospect that he wouldn't use his closer or would rest his key players during the games in which he had no wager. To me that was a kind of passive-aggressive game-fixing.

Rose was correcting me. Used that term. The emphasis was not "I BET on the Reds every night," but "I bet on the Reds EVERY night." To me, that takes a little of the sting out of the process. At least Pete Rose the manager wasn't subservient to Pete Rose the compulsive gambler. At least the game outcomes weren't affected because he was saving John Franco until a night he had $500 riding on the result.

Remember, that's the point of all this: Whether Rose could have fixed a game. The perception of the interview does seem to skew a bit from its actual content. We do respect Rose's devotion to his team, though; we think he actually bet on the Reds to win that interview.

In Defense Of Pete Rose [The Newshole]

• Sorry For That Very Regrettable, Very White Brawl With Yale Holy Cross." — Dartmouth Football Team.

• "Sorry For Setting Off That Nuke." — Kim Jong Ill.

• "That Whole Blowing Up Seven NFL Stadiums Thing? Just My Wacky Sense Of Humor. Sorry" — Internet Terrorism Guy.

• "Sorry For Stealing Steve Lyons' Material." — NASCAR Truck Series broadcaster Ray Dunlop.

• Sorry I Didn't Aim The Knife A Little Higher And Finish The Jo ... Um, So Sorry, Your Honor. — University of Northern Colorado backup punter Mitchell Cozad.

Dartmouth Apologizes For Football Brawl [MSNBC]
Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word [Deadspin]
Speed Channel Suspends Analyst Dunlap For On-Air Remarks About Hispanics [USA Today]
Attempted Murder Charge In Punter Stabbing [MSNBC]
Man Admits NFL Stadium Threat Was Hoax [MSNBC]

Rose is much too classy to profit from his misdeeds in baseball. Um, right Pete? Pete? What's this we found on your web site today?

Here it is — Your personal apology from Pete Rose! Add to your collection, or give as a gift, this custom, truly one of a kind piece of memorabilia straight from the hand of Pete Rose, all-time Major League career hits king. Pete Rose will hand sign a baseball with his now-famous "I'M SORRY I BET ON BASEBALL" inscription, addressed to you or the recipient name of your choice. Item will ship approx 3 weeks from date of purchase. Note: Recipient Name has a 15 character limit. Only $349!

Well, that didn't take long.

For any of you out there actually named Bob, you get first crack at this.

Pete Rose Personalized Autographed Baseball with "I'm Sorry I Bet on Baseball'' Inscription [Pete Rose.com]
Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word [Deadspin]

And here's a surprise: Rose says he's innocent. And to clear his name, he of course went to the one news source we can all trust: ESPN's Quite Frankly with Stephen A. Smith. We watched the video of Rose's Monday night appearance — twice — and still have no freakin' idea what happened; no one in the studio made a lick of sense.

So we remain kind of hoping that this story is true, because it could open up an exciting untapped collectibles market. Imagine Terrell Owens footballs signed: "Sorry I'm such a dick — T.O." Other possibilities:

• "Sorry about the hatchet — Maurice Clarett"
• "Sorry for the last two minutes of the Oregon game — Pac-10 officials"
• "Sorry about the Lusitania — Kaiser Wilhelm II"
• "Sorry for the popped collar — J.J. Redick"

Pete's Signs Of His Sorry Times [New York Daily News]
Rose-Signed Balls: "I'm Sorry I Bet On Baseball" [ESPN]

1. Defended Barry Bonds;
2. Condemned Bonds;
3. Told a weird story that went nowhere;
4. Made the point that taking steroids did not help former track star Ben Johnson with his hand-eye coordination.

Rose then told a joke — so forgetful that we actually forget what it was — and totally cracked himself up.

Maher then posed the question many have been dying to ask of Rose, we would imagine. "You've been itching to get into the Hall of Fame. But you have all the hits, you've done everything there is to do in baseball," Maher said. "So why don't you just say, 'I don't need your Hall of Fame?'"

A good question, to which Rose really had no answer, except to say that he wanted to be allowed back into baseball to "help younger players learn the game." This would have had a more noble ring to it if he hadn't been sitting next to a slot machine at the time.

Let's see. There was the Saturday, January 21 memorabilia signing at Caesar's Palace with Pete Rose, the place's regular occupant. And then, in a couple of weeks, you'll be able to see him with other San Francisco luminaries at the Cow Palace, signing whatever you put in front of him. (Except for NFL Super Bowl MVP items.)

We're not going to give out any information about any athlete's kids here ... but we will say that game that Montana had to rush home to catch Super Bowl weekend? It's a good thing Montana was at that one, because he definitely missed one when he was hanging out with Pete in Las Vegas.

Sign With Joe Montana And Pete Rose [Stars Live 365]
Checking In On Our Man Joe [Deadspin]

Here's today's: Pete Rose's son, Pete Rose Jr., has been arrested and charged with distributing steroids. Yep. From the AP:

The indictment says Rose admitted that he received GBL from an individual in Tennessee while a member of the Chattanooga Lookouts, the double-A affiliate of the Cincinnati Reds. He also admitted supplying half the players on that team with the drug. According to Rose, teammates would take GBL to "wind down" after the games.

This is the type of story that, ordinarily, we would live for. (Particularly since we always "wind down" with steroids too; it helps us come down from our regular ether high.) But our brains are currently spilled on the carpet of this hotel room, and our eyeballs are pointing in all different directions, like when we used to try to watch scrambled porn when we were kids. We hope to be back to normal soon.

Maybe They Can Give Him Dad's Old Cell [Student Of The Game"