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Peter King
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Actual quote from Peter King this morning: "I could watch the Frank Caliendo stuff about a hundred more times. He's funnier today than Belushi was 30 years ago. He's even got George Bush's facial expressions down pat. I mean, they're perfect." [SI.com]
peter king
Peter King's Onion Doppleganger
It's almost NFL season, which means we're all about to experience a solid five months of Peter King. This is fine; King knows more about football than almost everyone we know. But be prepared: MMQB is about to take up residence in your brain and lay eggs. More »
Peter King is back and in full effect, ripping on some guy for having his headphones on too loud on the plane. [SI.com]
media
Peter King, 13 Years Ago
A fascinating look back by the folks at 10 Cent Freeze Pops as part of their "Looking at old issues of Sports Illustrated" series: A 1993 cover story by everybody's favorite international online superstar Peter King about why the NFL is boring. More »
media
Deadspin Moral Quandary: PK Vs. KSK
Contrary to the popular opinion concerning blogs, we consider ourselves pretty nice guys. We mean well for humanity, pet puppies, occasionally give change to the homeless, say please and thank you, all that. But there's still this mindset that blogs are somehow mean. Therefore, we're looking inward and starting a sporadic feature called "Deadspin Moral Quandary." It will look at issues involving moral issues in the sports world, from both sides, and try to determine which side is right, and which is wrong. If you have suggestions for potential topics, please let us know at tips@deadspin.com. Today: Peter King Vs. Kissing Suzy Kolber. More »
cultural oddsmaker
Cultural Oddsmaker: A Very Special Episode
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think. Oh, and apologies, again, to The Dugout. More »
media
Dr. Z Hangs Out With Swimsuit Models
We know, we know: The unconditional love for SI scribe Rick Reilly's "Riffs Of Reilly" segment — sample comedic genius moment: "USC's quarterback is John David Booty and Texas' is Colt McCoy. Hey, weren't both those guys on 'Gunsmoke?'" Oh, Rick, you slay us! — makes you think that SI.com must be so tapped out producing such an earth-shaking segment that they couldn't possibly come up with anything else. But fear not, intrepid online sports content consumer: they've got so much more! More »
nfl
The Peter King-KSK Standoff
The rockers over at Kissing Suzy Kobler would like to let you know that they are reasonable people. All they want out of life is to make a few humorous comments about sports, go home to their families and perhaps enjoy a Krispy Kreme. Or three. But even reasonable people can be pushed to the edge, and KSK have reached their limit. It all has to do with columnist Peter King, and while we will go out of our way to stay clear of this controversy, we cannot say we do not understand where KSK in coming from. From today's post:"Here's the deal, Peter King: we're tired of you writing about the details of your life in your otherwise very enjoyable NFL column. ... Honestly, your column has become an insufferable, scattershot, imperious bore. Regular readers of Monday Morning Quarterback have now been subjected to your coffee habit, your green tea habit, your TV show preferences, your massive airport bowel movements, your torch-carrying for post-Katrina New Orleans, your complaints about coach seating on airlines, your correspondence with deployed servicemen and the goings-on of your family, most notably your athletic daughter Mary Beth."
KSK goes on to say that Peter King has until this afternoon to stop writing about anything non-NFL. If he does not comply, well, daughter Mary Beth will feel the brunt of their wrath. They have pictures of her, they have Photoshop, and they know how to use it.
We pray that both sides come to their senses before it's too late.
A Plea To Peter King, Before We Make Things Ugly [Kissing Suzy Kobler]
Peter King Archive [SI.com] More »
baseball
Roger Clemens Hates His Crotch
You might think that Peter King's gruesome description of the preparations he took to prepare for his colonoscopy would be the most disturbing thing you'd read all day. It would seem like a good bet; Peter, we love the freedom you have online, but there is such a thing as decorum and good will to your fellow man. Please: No more in-depth descriptions of your need to poo. Thank you. More »
espn
Who's Your Favorite Sportswriter's Binkie?
Inspired by a comment in this morning's story about Jason Whitlock and his rips on Michael Irvin, a commenter named Mr. Poon — who runs this site — pointed out something curious about Whitlock. Namely, that Whitlock, in pinch, will fall back on his blind spot; his odd belief that Jeff George (a high school classmate of Whitlock's) was/is, in fact, a great quarterback. George is, essentially, Whitlock's "binkie;" his safety blanket, an athlete that he "champions and claim sis better than anyone else is willing to admit." More »
nfl
Peter King, Hello!
We have always liked Sports Illustrated's Peter King, up until a couple of years ago, at least. He was plugged in, incredible for information, and had that everyman quality we Web people enjoy. But — and maybe because he's gotten all thin now, or maybe it's the breakneck schedule he keeps — he is clearly starting to take some dangerous turns toward the certifiably insane. The Mighty MJD does a great job of documenting this every Monday, but we have a postulate of our own to submit: We think Peter King is slowly turning into Larry King. You can barely tell the columns apart anymore. More »
nfl
NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a microwave until it began to bubble up and then finally burst, and then you covered that exploded head with months-old maple syrup and planted it in a field of fire ants ... you'd have an approximate physical manifestation of how Vikings quarterback Daunte Culpepper feels right now.• You know what would be really funny? If the Lions finished 4-12 this year, and GM Matt Millen was like, "Joey Harrington just needs more weapons" and then drafted him another wide receiver.
• If Brett Favre killed a man at midfield right before a game-ending drive that failed, afterwards, he would be called "heroically unconventional" by Peter King and Len Pasquarelli after the game. Well, as long as Favre still gave out the phone number to his Mississippi farm, where he's always out mowing when they call.
• Oh, and we just read the following sentence from Pasquarelli, about Jags QB Byron Leftwich: "Swathed in more ice than the body of Ted Williams, bearing huge discolored splotches and limping noticeably, Leftwich settled in front of a locker stall following a 10-3 defeat, looking like one oversized 250-pound welt. Had the Colts been charged with assault and battery by the local constabulary, the prosecutor would have only had to present a naked Leftwich to the jury, and deliberations would have lasted maybe 30 seconds." Doesn't that sound kind of like the "romance novel" that Mr. Garrison wrote on "South Park?"
• We are 100 percent that the reaction to the news that Jets wide receiver Laveranues Coles had gone public with the fact that he was sexually abused as a child by the majority of football fans was, "we can't believe he didn't get in the endzone on that play to the 1. We're starting T.J. Houshmandzadeh next week; Coles could have had two TDs."
• Speaking of fantasy football, it was totally a good idea to start Eagles linebacker Mark Simoneau as our fantasy football kicker rather than Lions kicker Remy Hamilton. Just a last-minute hunch.
• Lesser people, they might consider abandoning their team if a potential game-winning final drive were lost by a freaking false start penalty. Not us. Just don't mention the Buzzsaw to us today, OK?
nfl
Peter King Gets His Lindsay Lohan On
All right, now we know that Sports Illustrated's Peter King has lost a lot of weight over the summer, but as this photo from last month shows ... come on, Pete. We understand obesity is a key factor in heart disease, but wasting away that fast just can't be healthy ... More »
peter king
Stomach Stapling Browns Fans. There Is No God
OK, we know SI's Peter King is losing weight like mad and everything, so it's obviously on its mind. He still has a pretty amazing scoop in MMQB today: More »
