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more about #michaelphelps more comments → Beer-Fart: I love that guy in the picture's cough drops. #michaelphelps more » AzureTexan: Placing a distant seventh was Dusty Hill of ZZ Top. #michaelphelps more » UpstateUnderdog: Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit would have been good strategy if he was swimming against the Amish. #michaelphelps more » ArkansasFred: No, he literally wore a bathing suit made entirely from crushed Olde Style cans. #michaelphelps more » MattinglysSideburns: Was his beard more believable than Greg Louganis's? #michaelphelps more » Elhigh: Is this the same 'Slade he had given to him by his parents for winning at his first Olympics? I hope so. There are few things I hate more than kids ... more » UkraineNotWeak: And he never spilled the bong. He's some athlete. more » NordoftheBlings: Phelps & The Chicago Douche picked a good night to minimize newsworthy indiscretions. more » Doug Dascenzo's Only Fan: Hopefully this Escalade crash is less depressing than when I watched Troy Jackson come down off of an eight ball and twelve Red Bull vodkas. more » ClueHeywood: Michael had to take out that Tiburon. more » Bea Hate Me: I also enjoyed the music video on the rawmilk.org website, "Your Pasteur Is a Whore". more » Barry Petchesky: You non-starred folks are really missing out on unapproved commenter theater on this one. more » Bobby Big Wheel: Michael Phelps doesn't hate boats. Way to check your sources. THIS IS WHY PEOPLE SHOULD ONLY READ NEWSPAPERS. more » Hit Bull Win Steak: so that's not Richard Roundtree? - 99% of the people at Fenway last night more » supermike5alive: hello? the Sox only retire #s of HOF players (save for Pesky). more » -
#swimming
Michael Phelps Wears "Old-Style" Swimsuit And Facial Hair, Suddenly Sucks
"Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit, Michael Phelps missed out on two finals and barely qualified for a third Tuesday at a World Cup short-course meet." [AP] -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Involved In Car Crash
Don't worry, the sea god was uninjured when his Escalade plowed into another car in downtown Baltimore. But let's not forget he's already on probation for a DUI...[WJZ] -
#idolatry
The Real Reason Michael Phelps Won't Meet With the Pope
It's not because he got high (as we all know, the Pope smokes dope). The reason famous fish-person Michael Phelps won't meet with the Nazi Pope is buried deep in his family history, as revealed on his Wikipedia page. More » -
#watercoolerfodder
Heck Of A Career, Jim, But Can You DH Tomorrow?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day. More » -
#swimming
Swimming Records Made To Never Be Broken
Exotic fancypants swimsuits bestow ridiculous Aquaman-like qualities on anyone who wears one, which is why swimming officials have officially banned the suits—right after every record in the books is shattered beyond repair. More » -
#swimming
Sandwich Salesman Breaks World Record, Consummates Stalkerish Relationship
Michael Phelps claims one of the few records he doesn't already own, breaking Ian Crocker's mark in the 100-meter butterfly. "Phelps taped Crocker's picture on his bedroom wall for motivation six years ago, after Crocker set the record." [WaPo] -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Makes America Safe For Weed
Congratulations, dope heads! Your groovy hero has bonged his way into America's heart and now you're free to toke up wherever and whenever you see fit. Enjoy your reefer, hippies, and be sure to thank Michael Phelps when you do. More » -
#books
Michael Phelps' Life Is A Whimsical Morality Tale
Michael Phelps has "written" a children's book called How to Train with a T. Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals. Life lessons include strip club tipping etiquette and when to check-raise on Jacks or better before the flop. [Canadian Press] -
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#wakeupdeadspin
Ladies, Meet The Splash 'Stache
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap More » -
#swimming
Weezy Drops A Beat For Phelps
Lil Wayne's newest track, "No Quitter, Go Getter," begins: "Michael Phelps, this is for you, baby." He's heard that one before. [Jersey Chaser] -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Wins First Two Races in Return, Has a Goatee
He easily took the 200-freestyle and 100-butterfly at the Charlotte Ultraswim, and has a chance for another threewaywins this weekend. By the time London 2012 rolls around, I'll bet he's sporting full dreadlocks. More » -
#swimming
Who's Ready For Non-Olympic Year Swimming?
This guy, that's who! Also, Michael Phelps....who is totally amped to put the stripper orgies, poker parties, and mind-bending drug trips behind him and hop back in the chlorine water. Arrrghgh! More » -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Loves Chewing Tobacco, Loves Threesomes With Strippers
Nobody does news quite like UK's News Of The World and their latest shocking exposé is no exception—a bare-all interview with a Baltimore "dancer" who claims she double-teamed Olympic hero Michael Phelps
More »
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#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Finds Miss California Intellectually Stimulating
No more of this Miss California runner-up action for Michael Phelps. Apparently, he's decided that he will no longer settle for anything but the real thing with the crown. More » -
#michaelphelps
Jay-Z Defends Michael Phelps' Bong-Smoking Habits
"[A]ll these people who graduated from Princeton and Harvard, who are supposed to be pillars of the community, every day [they're] in the newspaper arrested for some kind of financial fraud." [Hip Hop DX] -
#michaelphelps
Was Michael Phelps Narced On By Careless Phish Fan?
Even though it was months ago that Michael Phelps' bong-sucking photo captivated The World and perished many endorsement opportunities, there's still some mystery as to how the photo became public. One theory: Phish heads. More » -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Is Enjoying His Swimming Exile
What's a famously rich, famously awkward swimming champion to do, when he's banned from the pool for too much outrageous behavior? Horrifying clubgoers with drunken makeout sessions is a good place to start. More » -
#michaelphelps
Phelps Bong Hits Feed The Homeless In San Francisco
Kellogg's recent dumping of Michel Phelps as its spokesman had at least one unexpected consequence: The sudden appearance of about 3,800 pounds of cereal at the San Francisco Food Bank. More » -
#michaelphelps
Bong's True Owner Is A Pro Poker Player, Calls It 'My Precious'
The owner of the famed Michael Phelps bong? It's Zachery "Carter" King, 23, who won the 2008 Poker Stars World Championship of Online Poker Main Event, earning $1.3 million. That buys a lot of weed. More » -
#michaelphelps
You Win This Round, Michael Phelps
Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott will not charge Michael Phelps for illegal bong shenanigans, but has vowed never to give up on trying to catch those wily Dukebrothersboys. More »

