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more about #swimming more comments → Beer-Fart: I love that guy in the picture's cough drops. #michaelphelps more » AzureTexan: Placing a distant seventh was Dusty Hill of ZZ Top. #michaelphelps more » UpstateUnderdog: Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit would have been good strategy if he was swimming against the Amish. #michaelphelps more » ArkansasFred: No, he literally wore a bathing suit made entirely from crushed Olde Style cans. #michaelphelps more » MattinglysSideburns: Was his beard more believable than Greg Louganis's? #michaelphelps more » Hit Bull Win Steak: It's fun to swim at the Y...M...C....A more » Civil Negligence: The Huffington Post even utilized its seldom used "ass cam" for the occasion. Well, Ted Kennedy has been sick since last year. more » Gourmet Spud: Sad? Whimsy? Swimsy? more » sarrible: Those suits had a limited lifespan anyway. The swimmers are wearing them so tight that the seams are splitting left and right. Which, frankly, is kind... more » ArkansasFred: Phelps is cool with the decision as long as you don't take away his bicycle horn and bucket of delicious herring. more » dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Swimming Records to Never be Made Out of Elbows Again more » X-tacle: However, the ruling will not take effect until 2010, giving everyone just enough time to set dozens of new, unimaginable records before the ban render... more » Hatey McLife: One thing that wasn't mentioned, is that after the make their way from the water in Rome they will still be able to use the milk of a she-wolf to reco... more » Karlifornia: I taped Carrie Prejean's picture to my wall, which help me set a new record in the 100-meter semenfly more » Hatey McLife: If Creative Steps Inc. is upset now, wait until they get served by Ron Santo's attorney. more » -
#swimming
Michael Phelps Wears "Old-Style" Swimsuit And Facial Hair, Suddenly Sucks
"Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit, Michael Phelps missed out on two finals and barely qualified for a third Tuesday at a World Cup short-course meet." [AP] -
#sadwhimsy
Swimsuit Still Has Major Rear Air Conditioning Problems
This poor Italian woman first suffered this indignity. Yesterday, U.S. swimmer Ricky Berens' suit also busted open in the back, revealing his backside to America. The Huffington Post even utilized its seldom used "ass cam" for the occasion. [KC.com] -
#swimming
Swimming Records Made To Never Be Broken
Exotic fancypants swimsuits bestow ridiculous Aquaman-like qualities on anyone who wears one, which is why swimming officials have officially banned the suits—right after every record in the books is shattered beyond repair. More » -
#swimming
Sandwich Salesman Breaks World Record, Consummates Stalkerish Relationship
Michael Phelps claims one of the few records he doesn't already own, breaking Ian Crocker's mark in the 100-meter butterfly. "Phelps taped Crocker's picture on his bedroom wall for motivation six years ago, after Crocker set the record." [WaPo] -
#sadwhimsy
Where Is The Brotherly Love?
Just when race relations in the United States seemed all hunky-dory — welcome to the White House, Mr. President — a swim club in Philadelphia kicks out 60 minority campers because they would "change the complexion" of the club. More » -
#swimming
A Hearty L'Chaim To Jason Lezak
Jason Lezak — three-time Olympic gold medalist, Phelpsian savior and, blessedly, former bar mitzvah boy — will skip the swimming world championships to race in Israel's Maccabiah Games. When in Jerusalem, he'll be hankering for Chinese food from Beijing. [AP] -
#swimming
Wardrobe Malfunction Costs Swimmer Race, A Little Bit Of Dignity
Italian Olympian Flavia Zoccari was disqualified from a race yesterday after her swimsuit literally tore her a new butthole. That's not going to sit well back home, but hopefully it will all work out in the end. [DailyMail, via Slanch] -
#books
Michael Phelps' Life Is A Whimsical Morality Tale
Michael Phelps has "written" a children's book called How to Train with a T. Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals. Life lessons include strip club tipping etiquette and when to check-raise on Jacks or better before the flop. [Canadian Press] -
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#wakeupdeadspin
Ladies, Meet The Splash 'Stache
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap More » -
#swimming
Weezy Drops A Beat For Phelps
Lil Wayne's newest track, "No Quitter, Go Getter," begins: "Michael Phelps, this is for you, baby." He's heard that one before. [Jersey Chaser] -
#deadcast
A Game Of “Healthy Fat Or Unhealthy Fat” With Martellus Bennett
Our Deadcast guest this week is none other than Martellus Bennett: tight end for the Dallas Cowboys, expert blogger and renowned Twitter fiend. More » -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Wins First Two Races in Return, Has a Goatee
He easily took the 200-freestyle and 100-butterfly at the Charlotte Ultraswim, and has a chance for another threewaywins this weekend. By the time London 2012 rolls around, I'll bet he's sporting full dreadlocks. More » -
#swimming
Who's Ready For Non-Olympic Year Swimming?
This guy, that's who! Also, Michael Phelps....who is totally amped to put the stripper orgies, poker parties, and mind-bending drug trips behind him and hop back in the chlorine water. Arrrghgh! More » -
#michaelphelps
Michael Phelps Loves Chewing Tobacco, Loves Threesomes With Strippers
Nobody does news quite like UK's News Of The World and their latest shocking exposé is no exception—a bare-all interview with a Baltimore "dancer" who claims she double-teamed Olympic hero Michael Phelps
More »
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#swimming
And Now Equal Time For Female Abs
I think Dara Torres has literally had a washboard surgically implanted in her abdomen. Trust me—the answer is not "drink more milk." [Sportress of Blogitude] -
#michaelphelps
Phelps Bong Hits Feed The Homeless In San Francisco
Kellogg's recent dumping of Michel Phelps as its spokesman had at least one unexpected consequence: The sudden appearance of about 3,800 pounds of cereal at the San Francisco Food Bank. More » -
#swimming
MSNBC's Idea Of Swimming Is Different Than Ours
Here's a screen grab from a Feb. 19 article on MSNBC Chicago on a hazing incident involving the Deerfield High School swim team. Um, girls, you're doing it wrong. More » -
#swimming
Woman Swims Across The Atlantic Ocean (Except When She Doesn't)
You may have seen recent headlines declaring American Jennifer Figge to be the first woman to swim across the Atlantic Ocean—an astounding feat, provided you don't actually do the math. More » -
#michaelphelps
Tony The Tiger First To Jump Ship
Kellogg's will not extend contract with Michael Phelps; Subway also mulls divorce. [Advertising Age] -
#michaelphelps
What We've Got Here, Is A Complete Lack Of Respect For The Law
Hmm; one thing that kind of got lost in the shuffle about this Michael Phelps bong hit business ... smoking weed is still sort of illegal here. Especially in states like South Carolina. More »
