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Fireworks! So loud! So destructive! So shabbily made! Why, they’re the perfect embodiment of America itself! No wonder we blow them up real good every 4th of July.
Cricket Australia will no longer set off flamethrowers at its matches after nearly burning its own captain to a crisp as he attempted to retrieve a ball past the boundary line.
The big Marist/St. Patrick game came down to the final second. We presume all of Chicago stopped what they were doing and pulled their cars off the road to watch a field goal try for the win. What they got: Pyrotechnics. [Awful Announcing]