Sounds On My Newborn Son’s Sleep-Therapy Machine, Ranked

My wife recently gave birth to a healthy baby boy that we named Ellis. He is a prodigious eater and likes a warm bath. (We have experimented both with a white foam tub and a mesh blue one that resembles a patio chair. I prefer the latter on all counts with the exception of its aquatic-themed design, which is insulting… » 5/05/15 11:28am Yesterday 11:28am

Watermelon-Eating Techniques Of Large Animals, Ranked

Feeding whole watermelons to large animals and uploading the resulting videos to YouTube is a thing that people do, and it is one of the best uses of the internet. It’s pretty exciting to watch these beasts lay waste to a 10-pound piece of fruit like it’s a grape or something. So here are some videos of large animals… » 4/30/15 5:30pm Thursday 5:30pm

Bayern Munich's 6 Goals Against Porto Today, Ranked

Bayern Munich had their backs against the wall. Down 3-1 to Porto after the first leg and short most of their best players due to injury, rather than folding under the pressure, Bayern kicked the shit out of their opponents 6-1, including a 5-0 lead at halftime. Here are all six goals, ranked by a top-secret… » 4/21/15 6:19pm 4/21/15 6:19pm

16 American Stouts, Ranked

Last Friday afternoon, I had the nerve to step away from my desk for as long as it takes to microwave a Hot Pocket and contemplate my sins, and Deadspin took advantage of those three unchaperoned minutes to damn near burn the place to the ground by running a piece with the title "Stouts Are The Best Beers." This was… » 3/17/15 12:59pm 3/17/15 12:59pm

Train Horns That Keep Me And My Wife Awake At Night, Ranked

My wife and I recently moved to a house in the Dunbar/Spring neighborhood of Tucson, Ariz. Because we had never visited the house in the middle of the night, we didn't realize quite how loud the freight-train horns were. We have adjusted, in part with the help of earplugs. (To spoil another potential list, let me… » 2/16/15 12:49pm 2/16/15 12:49pm

46 Times Vox Totally Fucked Up A Story

If you work in the media, you're going to get things wrong. Accuracy and timeliness are in conflict, and when you're dealing with vast amounts of information, accuracy will sometimes suffer. No one is happy about this, but it's how it is, and this is the tradeoff you implicitly accept when reading news. If you are… » 12/30/14 2:52pm 12/30/14 2:52pm

DJ Drama's Gangsta Grillz Mixtapes, Ranked

DJ Drama is arguably the most prolific and important DJ of the Golden Mixtape Era, which started roughly a decade ago and is still going strong—among rap heavyweights, only DJ Khaled comes close. The Philadelphia native somehow made himself the face of underground Southern hip-hop, proving instrumental in the rise… » 11/12/14 10:23am 11/12/14 10:23am