Carlo Ancelotti's Eyebrow Is The Greatest Thing Ever: A Gallery

Some may argue for Jon Hamm's jawline, Angelina Jolie's lips, or Halle Berry's cheekbones as the world's greatest facial feature but for my money, perfection incarnate is Carlo Ancelotti's left eyebrow. Its curve. Its omnipresence. It's the most interesting to happen on a human face since Cyrano de Bergerac's nose. » 3/07/14 3:24pm 3/07/14 3:24pm

Ball Boy Refuses To Give Ronaldo The Ball

This is from Sunday's match at Vicente Calderon Stadium, where Atlético Madrid hosted Real Madrid. Cristiano Ronaldo saved what would have been a Real Madrid loss and the first Atlético sweep of the series in 63 years with a late goal to make it a 2-2 draw, but who cares. This ball boy owned him so hard. » 3/04/14 2:13pm 3/04/14 2:13pm

Gareth Bale And Cristiano Ronaldo Swiss-Cheesed Schalke's Defense

Hey, stupid Real Madrid fans: can we stop pretending like Gareth Bale isn't still the great player Madrid thought they were buying? Today's complete demolishment of Schalke in the Champions League has to finally shut you guys up, right? » 2/26/14 5:05pm 2/26/14 5:05pm

How Atlético Madrid Is Making La Liga Fun Again

The typical European soccer league hierarchy is in a bit of flux this year. Yes, England's league, as usual, remains the deepest in the world in the midst of an amazingly competitive campaign with more swerves and shifts of momentum than a Gareth Bale free kick. But in Germany—often the most competitive from top to… » 2/11/14 2:47pm 2/11/14 2:47pm

Young Superstars Neymar And Gareth Bale Are The Future Of El Clásico

Tomorrow is El Clásico, a matchup between two of the biggest, most storied clubs in the world: Real Madrid and Barcelona. It's the best rivalry in sports because it's the best kind of rivalry in sports. For 90 minutes, decades of shared history, clashing politics and nationalism will intersect with soccer to create an… » 10/25/13 2:52pm 10/25/13 2:52pm

Facebook Map: The Manchester United States Of America

Champions League action resumes today, but who is America rooting for? The map above, using data provided by Facebook, shows which of the qualifying teams have the most "likes," by state. While Americans like to make fun of all the people overseas who randomly wear Yankees caps, it's a clean sweep in the U.S. for… » 10/22/13 1:50pm 10/22/13 1:50pm

Gareth Bale Scores On His Real Madrid Debut

After an excruciating summer, Real Madrid bought the Premier League player of the year Gareth Bale from Tottenham Hotspur for a world-record fee of £85.3 million. Today, Bale made his debut against Villarreal, who surprisingly were kind of thumping Madrid for much of the first half and took a 1-0 lead 21 minutes in. » 9/14/13 5:27pm 9/14/13 5:27pm

The Gareth Bale Transfer Saga Is The Worst Thing In Sports

This is so dumb. A few months ago, rumors started swirling about Tottenham's Gareth Bale, the Premier League player of the year, heading to Spain to sign for Real Madrid. All summer, it seems, Real Madrid has been closing in on the star for what's been reported by everyone to be a record-breaking sum anywhere between… » 8/22/13 5:23pm 8/22/13 5:23pm

Is Gareth Bale Really Worth $150 Million?

Even before Tottenham winger Gareth Bale swept the Premier League season individual awards last year, winning player of the year, young player of the year and Football Writers' Association player of the year, we knew that Real Madrid wanted him. We just didn't know how badly. » 7/28/13 5:30pm 7/28/13 5:30pm