Karim Benzema's Gorgeous Pass To Ronaldo Helps Tie Up El Clasico 1-1

Karim Benzema's tiny little flick to Ronaldo is a thing of beauty because it's the kind of devilish move that makes soccer special. At first glance, it's just another back-heel. Then Ronaldo comes charging down the pitch with nothing but green and a goalkeeper in front of him and you realize, oh my God, that play was… » 3/22/15 5:06pm 3/22/15 5:06pm

Lionel Messi And Cristiano Ronaldo Find Their Final Forms

For a depressingly large group of actuarial soccer fans, this season's thrilling edition of the duel between temporally and cosmically entwined superstars Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi has mainly served as another set of cudgels to club down the other's reputation and legacy. Go deeper, because if you're… » 3/19/15 2:39pm 3/19/15 2:39pm

Why Would Gareth Bale Want To Go Back To England?

There's a battle for Gareth Bale's soul being waged in the media of two different countries. On one side, you have the Spanish press expressing the frustrations of their readers by bashing the player's lazy, timid displays on the pitch. On the other, the press in Bale's native Britain is using its pages to decry his… » 3/17/15 4:18pm 3/17/15 4:18pm

Cristiano Ronaldo Reminds Us Why He's So Likable

In a weekend that saw Lionel Messi overtake Cristiano Ronaldo as the Spanish league's top scorer this season, Ronaldo can rest easy knowing his Argentine rival isn't likely to catch up to another one of his records: that of world's most-liked Facebook page. What makes him so beloved? Well, besides the multi-talented » 3/16/15 11:51am 3/16/15 11:51am

Why I Love Coutinho, And How Real Madrid's Slip Gives Us A Great Clásico

With the fireworks of the last few days, it would be natural to look down the sights and champ at how those results set up a couple blockbuster head-to-head matchups in the coming weeks. But let's take a second to look back and appreciate what we saw this weekend, which was magnificent. » 3/02/15 5:20pm 3/02/15 5:20pm

Cristiano Ronaldo Sings, Drops It Like It's Hot At Birthday Party

Real Madrid's crushing defeat at the hands of rivals Atlético almost put a damper on that night's previously scheduled party in celebration of Cristiano Ronaldo turning 30. Almost. Instead of feeling too down, Cristiano decided to sing and boogie the night away. Here's a GIF of his best move from the video above: » 2/12/15 12:29pm 2/12/15 12:29pm

Atlético Destroyed Real Madrid, Proving Their Continued Greatness

November 29, 2010 remains infamous for all who remember what took place in the soccer world that day. The date itself probably doesn't ring a bell, but if I showed you a picture of an elated, triumphant Gerard Piqué stabbing the air with his raised hand, each of his digits spread wide, it'd probably come to you. If… » 2/09/15 10:21am 2/09/15 10:21am

How Atlético Will Rely On Their New-Look Attack To Beat Real Madrid

Here we stand, on the eve of what will be the sixth Madrid derby of the season, and it's still a little weird acknowledging that perennial little brother Atlético Madrid should be considered favorites. After their devastating late defeat in last year's Champions League final, Atléti have beaten Real three times and… » 2/06/15 4:55pm 2/06/15 4:55pm

Fernando Torres Scores First Goal Back With Atlético Against Real Madrid

Hey, maybe this whole homecoming thing is going to work out, afterall! This is the exact kind of goal Torres has made his once-proud name so infamous, one where he had ample time to size up a fairly easy shot, and instead of scuffing it into an ad board, he spanked it home. » 1/15/15 2:25pm 1/15/15 2:25pm

How Real Are These Rumors About Gareth Bale To Manchester United?

The January transfer window is almost here, which means the rumor mill is just starting to rev up into the senseless, self-serving, outlandish, and dangerously addicting clusterfuck we've come to expect. And while some of the rumors can already be written off fairly easily—Barcelona to sell Busquets? lol—this whole… » 12/24/14 9:16am 12/24/14 9:16am

Viggo Mortensen Calls Cristiano Ronaldo A Pretty Boy Choke Artist

Viggo Mortensen—the NYC-born, Buenos Aires-raised Danish-American actor most famous for playing Aragorn in the Lord of the Rings movies—is a humongous fan of Argentine club San Lorenzo. His team has reached the final of the FIFA Club World Cup, where they face Real Madrid. As well as acting, Mortensen's good at banter. » 12/20/14 2:49pm 12/20/14 2:49pm

Spanish Soccer Official Bails On Meeting To Go To Real Madrid Game

One of the most pressing concerns in Spanish soccer today is how to deal with fan violence. Apparently, a more pressing concern is whether Real Madrid will win the Club World Cup that takes place this week, since the president of Spanish Soccer blew off a meeting addressing the violence to watch Los Blancos. » 12/16/14 5:48pm 12/16/14 5:48pm

17 Real Madrid Fans Banned From Stadium For Chants Of "Messi's A Retard"

You can understand, in light of the recent violence in Spanish soccer, why La Liga officials are a little sensitive to negative fan behavior, but this might be a bit much. Marca has reported that the league has banned 17 Real Madrid for chants aimed at Lionel Messi—"Messi's a retard"—and Catalonia—"Fucking Catalonia." » 12/08/14 11:37am 12/08/14 11:37am