Also, Rex Grossman has won the starting quarterback job — for the first day of practice. There was a coin toss at a Wednesday morning quarterback meeting. Kyle Orton called it, but Grossman won it and will run with the first-team offense Wednesday.

The really surprising thing here is that the coin wasn't picked off.

Right now every Chicago Bears fan has a single, solitary tear rolling down his or her cheek. And no one blames you at all.

Williams agrees in principle, Grossman wins coin toss to start [Chicago Tribune]

• We kind of love that Rex Grossman got so excited after the Bears' bizarre win over the Broncos yesterday. It was a vintage Bears game; Only one offensive touchdown, an inspiring 17-for-33 day for Grossman, Cedric Benson with 47 yards and ... oh, two Devin Hester touchdowns. (This has led to a new KSK character.) And after the game, Grossman was jumping around like he'd just pulled off the Flutie Heave. Do you think he went home and told everyone, "I won the game! I got the Bears back on track!" and everyone just has to smile and nod and try to look away without giggling? We'll say it one more time: Bring Back Orton.

• It's downright comforting to see the Giants collapsing in the second-half of the season. It's a rite of November passage. Like watching leaves turn, or Isiah Thomas saying everything's going to plan. We're pretty sure it happened because Peyton was there watching. We bet he enjoyed it more than he'll ever admit too.

• Don't know if anybody caught this post-Patriots win, but if you saw it, Andrea Kremer's postgame interview with Wes Welker was awfully amusing. In the middle of it, Welker said, "Coach is calling me over, and he's the one man I hold over you." And he left. Al Michaels then says: "Coming, Mommy." Sounds about right.

• We imagine Merrill Hoge just dancing around Bristol today, reminding everyone how right he was about Vince Young. On days Young plays well, we suspect Hoge calls in sick.

• Has any quarterback ever received more playing time for doing less than David Carr? Yesterday, he was benched for Matt Moore, whoever the hell that is.

• Browns fever, friends: The legend of Horse Balls continues.

• We are absolutely not ready to talk about that Buzzsaw game yet. Maybe later.

Yes, as any Broncos fan can tell you, Brian Griese is not savior. Only through the lens of Rex Grossman could Griese be considered any sort of legitimate starting quarterback; Denver brought in Jake Plummer to take over for him, and you might remember how that turned out.

We don't know why people are focusing on Griese so much. As you all know, only one man deserves the mantle of Chicago Bears starting quarterback:

The time has come, Coach Smith: Do the right thing.

Careful What You Wish For, Bears Fans [Signal To Noise]

• At this point, it seems obvious to everyone, presumably even Lovie Smith: Rex Grossman isn't going to cut it anymore. A normal person might have realized this after he, you know, fell apart in the Super Bowl — the Super Bowl! — but sometimes that sample size just ain't big enough. But now, at last, we know: It's Kyle Orton time, everybody.

• The general consensus heading into this season is that the Chargers would dominant the regular season schedule and then collapse in the playoffs. Norv Turner should be so lucky! To be fair, it's difficult for anyone to overcome the perpetual heroism of Brett Favre, and it's cute that Norv even tried.

• Imagine how much praise Donovan McNabb would be receiving this morning if he were white.

• We enjoyed Peter King being a voice of reason in a world of insanity on "Football Night In America" last evening, pointing out that Matt Leinart will remain the Buzzsaw quarterback despite Kurt Warner's "holy crap, that looks like Kurt Warner!" moments yesterday. It's nice to see Kurt back, actually. But no wife-in-the-crowd shots, alas.

• Some kudos, actually, to the Texans, most of whom limped off the field before finally succumbing to the Colts yesterday. We continue to have Texans fever, and if you don't stop scratching, it will never go away.

• We do find it amusing, actually, that Kurt Warner looked like he could still play yesterday, while Marc Bulger looked washed up. Football doesn't make any sense sometimes.

• The Patriots keep scoring 38 points every game. That should end next week: They play the Bengals, and should put up a ton more.

• Robin Leach has a blog.

• Vince Neil had a surprise birthday party — he's 46. 46! — at the Palms Fantasy Tower. Attendees included Criss Angel (whom Leach breathlessly describes as "magic's 21st century Houdini!" Seriously, Robin, what happened to you, man?), Dennis Rodman, Jason Giambi and "celebrity colorist" Michael Boychuck.

• Oh, and lest we forget: The Sex Cannon Rex Grossman was there, with Playmates! They were playing blackjack until 2 a.m., at which time they moved to the craps table. There, Grossman took out one of the Playmates' eyes with the dice.

• Seriously, what happened to Robin Leach?

Criss Angel's Brush With Death In Las Vegas [VegasPopular]

(Any mention of the Sex Cannon is required to be accompanied by a reference to where it all started.)

And that's just the tip of the iceberg. You can check out the whole shebang here (there are 8 pages of these). I'm not sure how to feel about the one in the middle there. It wreaks all sorts of havoc into Rex's image as the sex cannon.

Super Bowl XLI Surprises [SomethingAwful]

It's just — they're focusing on this guy like they don't focus on anybody! And I tell you, I know what it is. The media, the sports media, has got social concerns that they are first and foremost interested in, and they're dumping on this guy — Rex Grossman — for one reason, folks, and that's because he is a white quarterback.

This is absolutely true: This is why the media constantly rooting for black quarterbacks like Tony Romo.

Limbaugh Returns To Football Analysis [Media Matters, via Fark]
Limbaugh Resigns From NFL Show [ESPN]

You might remember the above ad during the Super Bowl last night, in which two car mechanics "accidentally" kissed because of their intense desire for a Snickers bar. (It's the one where they start ripping out their chest hair in response, which is totally manly.) Well, Towleroad checked out the official Snickers site for the ad, After The Kiss, which features various Super Bowl participants — including the Sex Cannon! — "reacting" to the ad.

It's pretty hilarious, mostly because each player just can't imagine that two dudes might lock lips. (The "I hope they got paid a LOT of money for that!" reaction is our favorite.) Though sorry, Rexy: We don't believe this is the first time you've ever seen two fellas making out. You went to Florida!

Snickers Super Bowl: "Quick, Do Something Manly" [Towleroad]
After The Kiss [Official Site]

Lord knows, it was all anyone could talk about during the telecast — Jim Nantz and Phil Simms, who were oddly competent last night, actually, acted as if the rain were some Biblical plague foisted on Dolphins Stadium by demons — and even if you had the mute on, someone forgot to put a cover on the main game camera, which was sprinkled with precipitation all evening. Not only did the rain make the ball and field slippery, it also apparently reacted poorly with chemicals in Rex Grossman's brain. (Which is funny, because we've always found that water dilutes vodka. Hmm.) It kind of takes some of the fun out of the Gatorade dump when the coach is already drenched.

At least it didn't electrocute Prince. With all that rocking, we're impressed he made it through unscathed.

We know this has been beaten into the ground by now, but really do consider it instructive to think of not only of the Indianapolis Colts as the St. Louis Cardinals, but also the Chicago Bears as the Detroit Tigers. In the former example, a team that had earned much recent success finally won a championship with one of its lesser teams (in a relatively dull deciding game/series). In the latter example, the guy(s) who throw all the balls kept making inexplicable, dunderheaded errors at the worst possible times. In the Tigers' case, it was the five pitcher errors; in the Bears', it was Rex Grossman.

It's just the day after the Super Bowl, and we should enjoy a team's championship before we start looking toward next year ... but it seems impossible that the Bears are ever gonna let the Cannon near their team again. Grossman's first errors were of the fumbling, "hey, it's wet!" variety, but by the fourth quarter, he truly was just his trademark "F—k It, I'm Goin' Deep!" In the Super Bowl. Against a terrible run defense. We wouldn't trust that guy not to break a piece of Tupperware. The postgame highlight for us was listening to Steve Young on "NFL Primetime," doing his best to disguise his disgust at such a befouling of his vocation, and failing.

It's a time to celebrate Tony Dungy, and (we guess) Peyton Manning earning their rings ... but there was only one historic performance last night, and it belonged to Rex Grossman. Sex Cannon, we barely knew ye.

Is Sexy Rexy's Reign In Chicago Over? [WBRS Sports Blog]

Anyway, Da Bears are heading to their first Super Bowl in 22 years, and that's a long time anywhere, and an especially long time for fans as intense as Bears fans. The game was actually a little closer than the score looked — we swear, there was a brief moment in the first quarter when we thought the Saints looked considerably better than the Bears — but it was still definitive. Not that anyone's going to have any faith in him come Super Bowl Sunday anyway, but Rex Grossman did make some key passes, including four on the key drive that put the game away. We are not as down on Sexy Rexy as some others are — you really could have made an argument for him to make the Pro Bowl this year, though that's less because of him and more because the NFC quarterbacks stink — and though he's more likely to throw three interceptions in the Super Bowl than three touchdowns, you couldn't doubt him much in the second half yesterday.

(Though we did find it amusing that he kept wanting to run off the field in the first half, only to have coach Lovie Smith — who is GREAT FRIENDS with Tony Dungy — wave him back on.)

But the Bears are in the Super Bowl; it's all Midwest, baby, all the time. No matter what, someone's gonna need to make sure Tank Johnson is locked in his Miami hotel room.

Super Bowl Bound [Chicago Tribune]

But yeah, this guy can't catch a break. Even in victory, in a game in which he played decent, it's all in spite of Grossman. Here's the lead from the AP game story yesterday:

Two swings of the foot by Robbie Gould were all the Chicago Bears needed to offset any shortcomings in Rex Grossman's arm.

Oof. Hey, thanks. Fear Rex! Meanwhile, the Bears, a team everyone has complained about all season long, is a home game away from their first Super Bowl in 21 years. Oh, and hey: Did you guys hear kicker Robbie Gould was working construction 16 months ago? Well, he was. What a triumphant story. He used to hammer nails, and now he hammers game-winning kicks. Get it?

Bears 27, Seahawks 24 [Associated Press]
Seattle Seahawks, You've Been Cannonized [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

The main question in the NFC this weekend: How will Bears quarterback Rex Grossman play? That is to say: Is he going to completely wreck the Bears again, or will he occasionally throw the ball forward and to a gentleman in the correct jersey?

No answers here, of course, in the last week of the season, as seen here, the Packers did show the correct way to put pressure on Grossman.

If that doesn't work, well, according to The Big Lead, you can just wait for him to get his Kyle Orton on.

That, friends, could also work. And thank heavens football players wear helmets.

Bears Quarterbacks Love To Party [The Big Lead]

(Not surprisingly, Kissing Suzy Kolber is having some fun with this.)

The Bears have the best defense in football, home-field advantage throughout the playoffs and a rabid fan base that hasn't seen a Super Bowl in 20 years. So why is everyone constantly looking for another NFC team to step up and represent the conference? Because of Rex Grossman. Even when he wins, like he did last week, he terrifies anyone who wants to believe in the Bears in any possible way.

Tonight should be an easy one; the Bears face the Rams, and the Cubs-Cardinals rivalry this is not. The Rams are a shell right now, and everyone's putting up points on them too. So if Grossman can do it tonight? Maybe?

Anyway, if you're up for such matters, it's an open thread for you to do with what you wish. It might not be the best game, but we do love the Bears' and the Rams' uniform, and it's a couple teams from the Midwest, so that's something. Enjoy, everyone, if you dare.