Deadspin
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mlb
What About His Face? Did Something Happen To Rick Ankiel's Face?
The Rickster was hospitalized after crashing face first into the center field wall last night. Doctors say he might not have been hurt at all if only he had kept the mustache. [Missourinet]
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Comment by wonderlic---myballs: In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches.... 8 Responses | Other threads
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rick ankiel
Rick Ankiel Is The Latest American Mustache Hero
According to the American Mustache Institution, Ankiel's "labia secula" (Latin for "lip sweater", apparently) is responsible for his increased production at the plate. [AMI]
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By DAULERIOComment by The Devil and Daniel Murphy: Why Rick Ankiel, you look like somebody walked all over your grave 5 Responses | Other threads
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rick ankiel
Goodbye Rick Ankiel, Hello Dick
"Ankiel has been preoccupied recently about when it is age appropriate for him to shorten his given name, Richard, to "Dick" instead of "Rick.""[StLToday]
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By DAULERIOComment by apostles03: Apropos of nothing, I always thought Dick Button had the funniest name everwhen I was a kid. 7 Responses | Other threads
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pining for darrell porter
On Vincent Gallo, Black Gallagher And Rotten.com Videos
This video has been online for about a year now, but I just saw it for the first time today. It's brutal, punishing and so uncalled for that it should come with a Tipper Gore warning. It's from 2001, when my immortal beloved Rick Ankiel was still struggling with his "control" and some minor league fans were letting him have it, and then some. It's like seeing other kids picking on your son; it's impossible to look at. More »
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By Will LeitchComment by Pardon_The_Bad_Post: Come on will. you walked in here unprepared and arrogant. you were sloppy. and i know why. you got... more » | Other threads
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mlb closer
Giants Show Everyone Their Merkin
Tim Lincecum and Merkin Valdez, what an unbeatable duo. Both were instrumental in the Giants' first win of the season on Wednesday, 2-1 over the Dodgers. Witness this AP paragraph, which is my pick for paragraph of the year so far: The Dodgers announced less than 20 minutes before game time that Hong-Chih Kuo would start on the mound in place of Chad Billingsley due to the threat of inclement weather. The Giants followed suit, starting Merkin Valdez and keeping Lincecum waiting in the wings. More » -
rick ankiel
We'll Believe It When We See It ... And Even If We Don't
Matthew Berry, whatever you do in this world, you've made a Midwestern boy happy this Tuesday morning. We don't believe it, at all, but you know, no matter what, it's quite the fun next chapter.
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By LeitchComment by anonymouseducator: Last year 5 guys hit 40 plus HR more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
Awaiting A Full Year From Ankiel
Yes, yes, we know: We have a bit of a bit of a blind spot when it comes to Rick Ankiel. But now that the lunacy of the final two months of last season are past us ... is the guy really ready to be an every day outfielder. More »
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By LeitchComment by UncouthSloth: @badead1: ...but LaRussa is a GEEEEEN-yusss! more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
Everybody come by and say hi to Mr. Ankiel at 3:30 ET today. [Cardinals.com]
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scott boras
Rick Ankiel's Depressing Big Buddy
Now that college football is over, and we have less than a month of the NFL left to go, perhaps we take a moment and look toward baseball. How about that heartwarming, inspiring story of, oh, what's his name .... More »
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By LeitchComment by Shawon-O-Meter: Are you sure you're not actually supporting Hillary, Will? With damning comparisons like that.... more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
What if Rick Ankiel had never stopped pitching? Sigh. [Ballhype]
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key pages in the mitchell report
The Rick Ankiel Section
So you don't have to sift through the whole document, we're gonna call out some key pages. More » -
2007 shoty
SHOTY First Round: Sean Salisbury Vs. Rick Ankiel
After almost a week off, the 2007 SHOTY Tournament returns with a matchup of two very different human beings. More » -
our last cardinals post for a while promise
It Won't Be Much Longer Now
Last year, on August 14, 2006, we admitted that if this annoying team actually won the World Series, we'd feel they didn't deserve it. We have changed our viewpoint on that. (Obviously.) But we were off by a year and a month: This Cardinals team stinks. We'd almost rather watch the Buzzsaw. More »
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By LeitchComment by metalmaniac: @Lady Andrea: I've been a Cards fan for almost 50 years, and I don't remember any season as fucked up... more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
Why The Radio Silence From The Cardinals?
It has been about 15 hours since the Rick Ankiel story broke, and so far, the only public comment has been Cardinals general manager Walt Jocketty's clearly confused, wha-wha-WHAT? quote of "This is the first I've heard of this; If it's true, obviously it would be very tragic, along with everything else we've had happen to us this year." (Hey, Walt: Screen your calls, dude!) This silence is not good, for anybody. More »
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By LeitchComment by pthomas745: So what happens if we find out so many players who had serious injuries were prescribed steroids or HGH ... more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
What We Lost, And What We Never Had
The Rick Ankiel thing, for Cardinals fans, has always been about hope. There was hope in 2000, when we thought we had discovered a 19-year-old Steve Carlton. There was hope in 2001 when we believed a young man could conquer his demons. There was hope in 2003 when we anguished as another young star went under the Tommy John knife. And, yes, there was hope in 2004, when we cheered as the prodigal son returned to rousing applause that was the sonic equivalent of a wool blanket on a cold November night. There was always an innocence to the hope; against all rational thought, we believed in Rick Ankiel because if you could believe in him, you could believe in anything. It made Cardinals fans proud of themselves; it was through our support, we believed, that Ankiel could frame his various comebacks. We would be patient; we would wait for him in a way we couldn't see other fanbases doing. It came from the very best part of us. We were so proud of ourselves. Whatever your thoughts on the jaw-dropping New York Daily News story this morning, that innocence is now replaced with ... something else.
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rick ankiel
Roy Hobbs Strikes Again ... And Again
Since the weekend we spent in St. Louis for Rick Ankiel's first games, we've done our best to take it easy on the coverage around here. Not because we didn't want to, but because we were afraid if we kept down that road, before we knew it, every post would be about him. And you might not like that. More » -
daily closer
Let's All Get Baked!
Yeah, the Royals are pretty fucking terrible, but try to not let that diminish your appreciation of Scott Baker's masterful performance. A leadoff walk in the ninth inning spoiled the perfect game before a one-out single to pinch-hitter Mike Sweeney (but I thought Jesus loved no-hitters! Now I don't know what to believe...). Baker finished off Kansas City and picked up the one-hit shutout in a 5-0 Twins victory. On an unrelated note, Francisco Liriano's arm fell off. More »
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Comment by Moonshine Mike: @Christmas Ape: marylanders never huffed paint. we huffed old bay and pcp more » | Other threads
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field trips
Our Rick Ankiel Weekend
It really has been bizarre to watch the reaction to Rick Ankiel's triumphant return to St. Louis as a power-hitting outfielder. We understand that it's an inspiring story — obviously — but it's still odd to see a guy we've been quietlystalkingfollowing for seven years now suddenly leading newscasts. As we mentioned on Friday, it's like turning on CNN and seeing a Breaking News Alert: "Mattoon, Illinois to open second Hardee's store." We're touched that everyone suddenly cares ... but Rick's ours, you know? More » -
daily closer
He's A Rick ... House
When Rick Ankiel made his debut, I was sort of hoping he'd continuously foul tip the ball to the backstop, just like old times when he was a pitcher. But rather than indulge in my fantasy, Ankiel basically shut all of us up Thursday night, then duct taped our mouths shut Saturday night with his first ever multi-home run game in the St. Louis Cardinals' 6-1 win over the Los Angeles Dodgers. Ankiel finished the night 3-for-4 with three runs and three RBI. If he keeps this up, the Cardinals trainers might have to begin lacing Scott Spiezio's pancakes with cocaine ("Aw, shucks, Scott's off the wagon again. Rick, you're staying with us in October.") More »
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By sussmanComment by Come a little Miroslav Klose You're My Kind of Man: @wes mantooth: I have a dread that Milwaukee is going to manage to win only 81 games, again -- meaning... more » | Other threads
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rick ankiel
One Glorious Night At Busch
We're gonna get this out of the way first thing, so we can all move on with our days, OK? Thank you. So, Rick Ankiel. More » -
rick ankiel
Roy Hobbs Returns
We got into St. Louis just in time for Rick's homer. We were there for it. So yeah: It's been a pretty fun night. More tomorrow. -
forgive us as we weep sweet tears of hope
Ankiel Gets The Call
He is the The Natural, he is Young Musial, he is the alpha, the omega, the beginning, the end. And, as of today, he is a member of the St. Louis Cardinals. Sources tell us that an announcement that Rick Ankiel has been called up to the big leagues is scheduled for later this afternoon/weekend. More » -
rick ankiel
Here's that Rick Ankiel comic book cover we were telling you about. [The Beat]
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the hulk has nothing on him
The Man Needs No Superpowers
We can't thank Benjamin Hill of Minor League Ball enough for this little tidbit: We're about to get our comic book geek on with our hero among heroes. More »
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By LeitchComment by ScottVanPeltIsMyHero: @metschick: Bon soir. I too will be leaving, I want to do a little reading before bed. Good night everyone! more » | Other threads
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man crushes
Ankiel's Gonna Sit A Few All-Star Plays Out
Forgive us, but it's time for a Rick Ankiel update. More »
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By LeitchComment by CardinalRedOctober: Will, Thanks for the update. Keep 'em coming. more » | Other threads
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man crushes
Rick Ankiel Is Going To Be Here Any Minute Now
Oh, it's so close now, friends ... As you know, our serious, debilitating man crush on Rick Ankiel makes it nearly impossible for us to have even the slightest bit of perspective on him. Every time we think about him, we want to give him a Harold Reynolds. We still wear the jersey every time we play softball. And we wrote 2,500 words on him for the new book. We're a little obsessed. More »
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By LeitchComment by Convergent_Punk: Ankiel is a loser. If he were a winner, with his stuff, he would be pitching and would already... more » | Other threads
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man crushes
Yeah, Laugh It Up, Rick. Jerk. (Just Kidding, We Love You!)
This happened a while ago, but this is the first we've seen of it. More »
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By LeitchComment by Dan Serafini: I think Ankiel has a death wish, as we all know that space shuttle astronauts have a longer life expectancy... more » | Other threads
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baseball
Rick Ankiel, Six Years Later
As we await tonight's hopefully-not-rained-out NCLS Game 1, we think back to 2000, when the Cardinals and Mets last met under these circumstances. This is known, of course, as the Rick Ankiel series, when the blistering lefthander, whose curveball was one of the most gravity-defying things we had ever seen (along with Skip Bayless), melted down in the most gruesome way possible, essentially ending his career and making Tony LaRussa hesitant to ever count on anyone under the age of 30 not named Pujols again. More » -
baseball
Saying Goodbye To Rick Ankiel, Once Again
With all the activity in the world of our St. Louis Cardinals over the last week, one story slipped through the cracks a bit: Terminally tortured "prospect" Rick Ankiel, who is now 26 years old and can hardly be classified a prospect anymore, underwent surgery on his left knee and will miss the rest of this season. Ankiel, as has been well documented, is trying to make it as an outfielder after flaming out from years of wildness, and now that has been postponed for yet another season. More »
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By LeitchComment by Will Leitch: Well, I doubt I'd care as much as I do now -- because I really do care, way too much,... more » | Other threads
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